Addiction to opioids

Treatment and medication
1

Well it's 6am and I'm in a bad place. My life's turned upside down over the last several years due to taking opiods. It started in 2009 when I slipped in the shower which resulted in a pro lapsed disc L2. Was given tramadol which didn't do anything. Pain was so bad I went to A&E in the early hours and was given 2.5ml of morphine. Well that was it right there that moment that my life changed. I went ho.e floating pain free feeling amazing so it wasn't just about the pain relief obv the actual drug gave me a feeling i had never had before. My doctor and had several since was reluctant to prescribe me any but after pleading with him he did so. After an op I developed nerve pain which was a risk due to operation. This increased my pain ten fold and over the next few years I tried different meds until I was given oxycontin. Now in 2017 after a second successful operation my pain has gone apart from the odd flare up. At this stage im prescribed 160mg 80mg x 2 oxycontin plus 20x4 oxycondone daily and don't need it for pain. I've reduced it slightly and suffered withdraw but I'm really worried if I'm going to be able to stop taking this medication as I don't feel im taking it for the right reasons and have a major additicion/dependence. I've lost my marriage live alone and exist only to take meds daily it's not a nice life to live and I also lost my mother last year and was abusing the medication which blocked out the pain of my loss.. I just don't no where to turn my doctor surgery is a joke and you can never get in to see anyone i just feel abandoned and left to deal with this myself..

Not sure how much longer u can go on like this and would appreciate any help or advice.

Thanks for taking time to read my story. It's not put to you in a very informed way but it's difficult to explain in depth. So much has gone on but my memory just can't bank all that's happened.

Cheers

Danny

1 Like
2

Danny

Almost as bad situation was on pain medication for 12 years cocodamol and tramadol. 30 plus cocodamol and 16 plus tramadol daily 

Before back operation to fuse four lower discs.

Oxy was added to the above medication afterwards

That was 18 months ago.

Hell on earth to come off medications 

Was at least 6 months to feel normal. 

Still days now that feel was better on the pills! 

Sorry to throw that in.

Anyway got NO help from anywhere least of all Doctors was treated as !!!!. Would of had better help if was a smack head. Can you believe that.

So basically Danny it's down to you....

If you ever need anybody to talk to message me. Am here.

Been totally clean now 18 months.

Arsenal Gunna

3

Danny

I feel your pain mate seriously. I've been where you are & it's a horrible place to be. It's actually He'll & back plus some!!

I started on Oxycodone then ended up being prescribed 800mg of Oxycontin per day, 1x80mg & 1x120mg 4 times per day but, I got so addicted I was taking closer to 1500mg per day.

I know exactly what you're going through, I couldn't get any help, know one wanted to know. I felt my GP put me in the mess then left me to deal with it.

I didn't live I just existed. I was suicidal.

I lost all interest in anything & everything. Depression, anxiety you name it. So when I i say I know what you're going through I really do.

You don't feel like it's you anymore, like someone has taken over you, like something is missing from how you used to be etc etc etc & it's so very hard to explain to people.

The people that made this drug have been found $650million in lawsuits in the states for saying it was not addictive!!! It's called "Hillbilly Heroin" in the states because thats exactly what it is. Heroin!!

I've now been off Oxycontin for 12months & I did it by going to a new GP who put me on a tapering program. I dropped down from 1500mgs down to 320mgs quite well, then I hit a brick wall. That's when I really hit rock bottom & didn't want to live anymore.

But, I kept fighting it till eventually I got put on methadone to stop with drawals & this replaced the Oxycontin.

I've reduced the Methadone over time & I'm now on 35mils per day from 115mils.

It's a long hard journey mate but you can get there with the right help & support. You can't do it on your own!!

If you need to talk private message me mate.

Good luck

& take care, you will beat it

Ritchie

1 Like
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Can someone please tell me yet again why my message to Danny is waiting to be moderated???

I'm trying to help him by offering my ows personal experience. I haven't swore or used any bad language yet, yet again my message is waiting to be moderated when this poor bloke needs help!!!

Ridiculous!!!!!

5

Danny

I've sent you a private message about how my GP had me on 800mgs per day of Oxycontin & how it turned into 1500mgs per day.

I've sent it privately as hopefully that way the moderators on here won't block it for no reason at all!!!!

Ritchie

6

Cheers man I'll update you in the next few days I'm really just low at min and got no interest in anything. Lost everythink and got no one so life's a bit weird on heavy drugs everyday on your own .

Cheers kid

7

If you want to come off them, and really want to, start reducing your dose, slowly, by about 10%. So start with dropping one of the 20 mg. You shouldn't get too much withdrawal from that. Then after a couple of weeks to a month, take out another 20 mg. You can cut the non-long acting in half for lower dose reductions.

However, if you are still in pain, this may not work. Are you still in pain? 

I have been on morphine for about 6 years now and need it for my pain. I had a 'new' doctor (new not just to me but to the field of medicine) after mine retired. He cut me by 25% the first time I saw him. It was rough and for the first time in my life I had trouble sleeping (among other things). Overall he dropped me by 40% in 3 months, and my pain scores increased considerably. I have since dumped him, but now need to drive 3 hours each way every two weeks to get my meds (good thing I am self-employed). 

Make sure you are ready and really want to stop. Otherwise you will certainly fail, and failure doesn't seem like something you need right now. However, it is normal to 'fail' or 'relapse' or have a day you go back to a higher dose after decreasing. Don't let that get to you. If you want to, you can do it. 

I just worry what you will do about your pain, because despite what else these drugs can do, they do help with pain. 

Take it easy and be strong. You will get through this. However, it would be easier if you had some support on journey. Do you have anyone who could help you through this? 

If not, people here are here for you.

peace and blessings. 

8

Good advice to Danny Judi.

I actually turned Morphine down as the name frightened me. Ĺittle did I know after being on and offered Oxycontin for a while with never once being told by my GP it was legal heroin, after finding out later it was actually 2.5x stronger than morphine. That's when I realised I was in a mess!!

That's when I went back to my GP for help & was told well, we only normally give Oxycontin to cancer patients. They're gonna die anyway so being addicted to it wont be an issue for them really will it!!

Gobsmacked was an understatement!!!!

Take care Judi

Ritchie xx

9

Yep Oxy is much stronger. Meanwhile my doctor who reduced me to severe pain wanted to switch me to Oxy it to help with my 'taper'. Hhhhmmmm..... I am tapering you, so here have something stronger.

Apparently switching can help, but I prefer things that come from nature—my morphine is extracted from poppies. Other 'opioids' have never seen a poppy, or are very far from it. Oxy is 'semi-synthetic' and the 'opioid crisis' upon us (that has kicked many chronic pain patients to the side of the road) is from pure synthetics, like fentanyl or carfentanyl made in labs and bathtubs around the world. 

Purdue Pharma originally marketed Oxy as being "non-addictive", another problem. 

How is your Oxy going? It is much stronger. Humans do strange things to natural substances. 

You take care as well Ritchie.

Judi

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I've been explaining to Danny how the manufacturers of Oxycontin have made $31billion just from this one drug & how they've had lawsuits in America equating to well over $650million.

You don't have to explain Purdue Pharma to me Judi, I know all about how much blood they have on their hands!! But, I've copied this message just in case I have to send it you privately, as every time I mention their name on here my post gets moderated!!!

Strange that hey??????

11

That is certainly strange Ritchie, but where there is power there is control ; ) 

Take care. 

12

Sorry to pipe in, but that is a very high dose Ritchie!!!

The doctor that took me in only to reduce my dose and increase my pain thought my 365mg of morphine was "very HIGH". 

1500mg of Oxy is equivalent to about 4000mg of morphine. 

Geez, those doctors should also lose their licenses. Have you considered launching a complaint? That often gets some attention, or may at least make you feel a bit better. 

You did not do this to yourself, the system did it to you. Be strong and take it slowly (slowly being key). 

Judi

13

Hi Richie hoes tricks mate..

Kids go back to school today so I'm gonna focus on myself over the next few weeks and get a grip of this out of control addiction..

I've been meaning to message you but I want to when I've got no distractions and have a good chat. I showed my daughter the convo we had and see was really touched by your kindness .. she lives with me and worrys a lot . She's been my rock to be honest but it kills me to expose her to this mess .. I'm ment to the one protecting her from nasty things in life but it's the other way around at the minute which make some feel really low to sat the least.. got docs app in morning . So I'll speak to you soon .

Just fought I'd touch base and let you no I'm gonna get intouch .

Stay safe and have a blessed day

14

Hi Richie been away for while I’ve had no phone or internet due to money issues. 

Put me on universal credit now. 

Just thought I’d touch bass with you. 

I’m actually waiting on a call off Claire from London.  Not been a good last few weeks medication wise. It’s getting me down mate. Never ending struggle so seriously thinking of going on a sub but gonna speak to Claire and see what she think. 

Hope Caroline’s okay aswell I’ll catch up later 

Danny 

15

Sorry to hear you've been in a bad place my mate. Christ it's hard Danny but, you have the strength to get there my mate, i know you do & i know you'll beat this!!

My ESA appeal date has come through for 16th November (my daughters birthday) so hopefully a double celebration on that day, and one where i can stick 2 fingers up at those Corrupt Sharks we call our government mate!!!!

I hope Claire can help you like she helped me. Just keep on hanging in there Danny, you WILL get there matey!!

Take care Danny!!

16

Hi mate 

She called late today and we had a good chat. She thinks I should just stay as I am does wise and get thru Xmas. She’s calling me next week. She definitely knows things my doctor doesn’t.  Very understanding which was refreshing after banging head on the wall for so long with various doctors. 

Hope your appeal goes in your favour I’m sure it will 🙏 

Speak soon mate 

17

Thats great danny!

She knows her stuff, she was really great & helped me loads.

Thats mate, im keeping everything crossed!!!

18

This thread has been a while. Just wondering how you are doing now? I read your story and I’m in your exact position.