Perimenopause
Hi Debbie, I have only missed one period. However, having always suffered badly with PMT I didn't notice any difference. Neither did my family!!!! From what I have read it appears the symptoms remain, sadly. Hope this helps. It's a worry and it would be reasonable to assume that a practitioner would be able to provide some sound advice. Alas that does not seem to be the norm.
Hi Debbie,
I am 49 and still pretty much regular as clockwork, apart from one period last year being 3 weeks late.
Last September I had to see my doctor after getting what I'd term as DMT not PMT - During not Pre! The day my period started I was weepy and I found myself crying at the drop of a hat all day every day for 5 days. I was paranoid, uptight, unreasonable etc...and it was so bad that a friend who never takes tablets for anything unless it's antibiotics actively encouraged me to get antedepressants asap! I was prescribed Fluoxetene to take for so many days each month but I was horrified to discover it's another name for prozac so I only took 3 days worth, until I felt better.
That aside, I am finding that PMT and into the period can be horrendous! If I'm not weepy I am angry - furiously so! Luckily It's pretty much all directed at myself, particularly during the episodes of brain fog and forgetfulness! However, no-one who knows me would have recognised the harridan who stormed across the garden to shout at someone in a neighbouring garden (of a house where no-one lives at the moment) who had set yet another bonfire to clear their DIY waste, because I had washing out! As soon as I saw smoke and flames through the window I saw red and just acted on instinct! It took me ages to calm down afterwards!
But that is how the perimenopause is affecting me - dreadful mood swings and brain fog - and now insomnia! I have noticed my moods improve, along with my energy levels, as soon as my period finishes, but these restless nights have only been going on for 2 weeks and I haven't discovered a solution yet. I seem to wake up feeling battered and bruised, too, at the moment!
So you are by no means alone! We go through life hearing about hot flushes and loss of libido, etc, but they never tell you about the other crazy symptoms! When I was a teenager, a lad at school lost his mum when she committed suicide during "the change" - I can understand the triggers now!
Yes, I'm 49 and in full hormone meltdown. The smug and irritating post office guy wouldn't give me my parcel yestrday, despite me having ID, and insisted it needed to be redelivered. I saw red and I told him he was a pathetic little jobsworth with a tiny penis (I was ruder than that). I felt like I was going to turn into the hulk, and yet anybody who knows me would describe me as easy going.
I stormed out trying to slam the door, but it was one of the slow, controlled close doors, so that didn't have the dramatic impact I'd hoped for. When I got home I burst into tears then rang the Post Office head office to complain about him WHILE STILL CRYING. The woman must have had me pegged as menopausal from the outset.
How I'm going to handle collecting my Amazon packages from now on is anybody's guess.
And brain fog. God the brain fog. I feel like I'm in a zombie trance somedays, watching my life happen as if it was a movie and I am playing no part in controlling what happens. A deflated blob of a woman. Forcing myself to get out and do something or socialise, even though I really don't want to, is the key for me.
Oh Scrangelina! You sound SO like me - were we separated at birth???
My mum once asked me (during my "normal" PMT years) if I felt like an overwound clock spring? That was the perfect description! However, that clockspring could only take so much overwinding and just keeps snapping these days! Woe betide any hapless callcentre employees ringing when I'm busy (usually during Neighbours!), particularly the Indian ones who plough through their spiel and rarely take no for an answer!
I was brought up to be polite and still feel awful being rude, BUT! One day I just screamed down the phone before slamming it down (it isn't really satisfying when it's a cordless phone though), another time I shouted I was dead!
Hahaha my mum and dad, who's completely gone for gold in the behaving badly club, have a whistle and if they get unsolicited phone calls they blow their whistle down the line.
Another thing that drives me mad, along with unsolicited phone calls from annoying people, are slow pensionsers, driving at 20 miles an hour, and you can't even see their heads because they're so shrunken. I end up doing that shouty thing in my car, where nobody can hear but me, which is really pointless.
I know what you mean! I shout at my mobile a lot - which doesn't make the signal any stronger and it isn't the gadget's fault it's the service provider! If I want to stick my head upside down down the back of the sofa I can have a mobile phone conversation in my house - but no-where else at home!
Re foreign call centres - ask THEM questions...they can't compute that, blow a fuse and hang up! I can only do that in my more lucid moments and they are few and far between these days!
Lovely Jay in Spain recommends taking several B vitamins for brain fog / memory / mood swings - but how do I actually remember to look for them whenever I go into town??
Hi Debbie
I am 49 and approaching year 9 of peri 😫 last couple of days I am back with the body aches and no energy .... it tends to get me badly at certian times of month..
last period was Aug 13 .... feel sickly today, not wanting to do alot, have to push myself, also trapped something in my neck/shoulder which doeant help...
as for feeling angry, I dont feel angry, ( i havent the energy 😀
I tend to avoid anything that upsets me or will wind me up, I cant handle it... stress i try and avoid, just seem to want quiet and peace... Jay xx
debbie
I have fog head today, what i also meant to say was... you may find that you feel worse at certain times of month, I do I think its still PMT ( but no period) I get the aches more, fog brain, sickly feeling, and tears from no where, then... a few days later I feel good for a while... then it all comes again... energy has been affected alot, but anxiety is getting better ... The B6 has helped this with me I think it must be that as since taking it I am not so anxious at all... I do know that 9 years of this has been a pain in the butt, and I only pray when its over things get abit better, I dont take HRT, not an option for me... Jay xx
I am through menopause. Haven't had a cycle in 15 months, but in addition to the body pain, I have pretty bad mood swings. I feel like crying most of the time. I don't know if that is from feeling so crappy and in pain or if it is an actual byproduct of my menopause. Some days I am dead tired and I'd like to nap, but never fall asleep, or on the rare occassion I do, I wake up with a real fog in my head and sometimes I am lightheaded and dizzy. The whole thing just stinks. I am the type of person who go, go, goes. I never stop and lately I can't find much energy for anything. My concentration level is crazy too. I'll go to do something and not remember what I was going to do. I'd like to tell you that when you are through menopause it gets better, but for me it hasn't yet. Still holding out hope that it won't be the 3 - 5 years for things to settle down that I hear it is.
I just put on some music and forced myself to have a dance. Admitedly it was a bit of a 'mum's shuffle', and I didn't make any impressive shapes, but it made me feel better. I cannot express enough how much I didn't want to do it, but I put on 'brown eyed girl' and did it anyway, and now I feel better. I think it's the endorphins releaed from the brain. Anyway, if you're not in too much pain, try it. Don't think abou it, just do it. :-)
Excellent idea - sometimes forcing yourself to smile makes you feel happier, however much you don't want to - love the dancing idea! They also say 'surround yourself with positive people' , which is definitely worth trying - drop the 'friends' that moan and whinge, and see more of those that make you feel good and make you smile - I have done this and after the first pangs of guilt, feel so much better for doing it - and for me, reading entries on here from fab women like Scrangelina and Madcow1964, who can make the pain of the change into entertainment to sooth our heated brows - both of you make me laugh out loud! Keep it up girlies, laughter is the best form of medicine. I ripped into the washing machine people recently for forgetting to turn up, and know that they are dreading coming to my house anytime soon. To anyone out there feeling angry, foggy or overheated - be kind to yourself, and cherish those who put up with you too!
Hi Scrangelina
I did that other day, put Queen on ' i want to break free' hahaha and did the ironing and danced about, also went on rower machine and felt uplighted, exercise does help... its just getting iff the sofa 😄😃😃😃😃😃 to do it ... ( joke) my energy today is shocking.... none, but as I am a OCD clean freak I have pushed myself to crack on, and in a while I am off to a big shopping centre, I really havent got the energy, but hoping I will push myself and enjoy it ... sometimes you just have to push yourself, well, thats what I find, then the day gets better... 😃 Jay x
Scrangelina... ' i put uplighted ' Meant to say uplifted... ' what a drongo I am' ..... take care ladies... Jay xx
Hahaha I like the idea of you being an uplight Jay. You were my uplight the other week. I had the period from hell after that - so I was actually due on. I couldn't even go to bed for two nights as I was needing to change my pad (tena ladies incontenance night nappy is all that'll work for me) every hour or so. It's over now though, so I'm feeling better. Forced myself to get moving today - although somedays I simply can't.
I've blitzed the house, and it looks amaaaazing. The queen could visit me right now and I'd be ready for her. And boy do I feel better for a tidy house and a washing line full of towels and sheets blowing in the sunshine.
My husband's going to be happy to see everything under control when he gets in. It's him I feel sorry for. He never comments or judges when he comes home to a slum and a depressed slug woman, but I can see he's relieved when the old scrange puts in an appearance and takes back control.
But basically you have to push yourself, you're dead right, even if your only task is to take a shower and clean the kitchen, you'll feel less out of control and rubbish about yourself. I also find that limiting myself to half an hour on the internet is best - you can get sucked into a dark place if you spend all day thinking about how ■■■■ your life has become and talking too seriously to too many depressed people. Mind I'm having a good day, so that's easy for me to say today.
Love the attitudes ladies!!! 
I too push myself even if I don't feel like it. I am a neat freak and always like the house and my yard just so. It does help to get moving and do things. I just got back from a salon and a lovely new haircut. I feel more myself today. Going to go clean some carpeting and then take a long walk. I am a photographer and have sessions to plan after that. I think it's going to be a good day for a change.
Thank you so much for calling me a fab woman - no-one's called me that before! You've made my day! CJD are my initials - hence the Madcow name - but as menopause takes hold it couldn't be a more apt name!
Ladies - I agree about the whole music thing. Several weeks ago, about period time, I had spent part of the day feeling grumpy (lucky Dwarf eh??). Late afternoon hubby came home and went to bed with a bad head, which left me to go to see my parents (plus my brother up for a visit with his fiancee) alone. Not a problem, we have all always got on really well and have a daft old time even at our ages. However, faced with an hour's drive and no company I burst into tears and still felt fragile and weepy when I set off. But when I realised I'd left The Divine Comedy (Father Ted theme, etc) CD in the car - hey presto - mood uplighted and uplifted as I sang along, especially to "National Express" (with the crazy line "But it's hard to get by when your arse is the size of a small country...." and no hubby to grumble at my singing! I'd also sneaked a Coldplay CD in (ok, yes - I'm a fan, unfashionably, and I don't care!) and I can recommend "Every Tear is a Waterfall" - very lively and joyous!
I love coming on here - never fails to make me smile - today it's Scrangelina making odd shapes, and Jay uplighting the world! And Madmarilyn calling me fab!
Thank you ladies!
I just want to thank you for being so honest with me and to say that I am sorry you have to go through the mood swings like I do. Nobody warned me about the pain or the severe anger and the only thing that has come close to giving me some relief is medical marijuana. Not sure if the HRT is doing anything for me but I 'm going to give it some time to get in my system and do ???
The anger is painful in itself and please do not get angry with me but, your story had me laughing so hard. I've done some pretty embarassing things myself and don't go out amongst the public too often these days.