I have battled depression and chronic pain in the past with spine problems and surgery. I am now suffering with severe knee and leg pain. I thought I had this depression thing whipped. Came off all the meds and everything. Feeling pretty good for the most part, then this knee pain came. It is debilitating at times. It is odd. Some days I wake up and its like it was never there. Other days like today I can't eat enough pain pills to get by. I own my own business so I have to work. Lately the feelings of despair and aloneness have crept back up. I cry myself to sleep most nights. I have at least one panic attack a day. I live in constant physical knee pain. My mood has gotten worse than it was before depression meds. I burst into tears for no reason several times a day. I don't know how long I can take it. It is like a black cloud follows me around and the moment I think I have come from under it and see a ray of light, it is right back destroying my hopes again. I have taken every medication I can find and get my hands on. Nothing helps. I think I have relapsed into something worse than before. I feel sorry for my family as I am useless to them. I really don't want to get back on the anti-depressant merry go round again but running out of options.
Hi mtm, Man....you sound like you have the same problem I have. Only thing is I never got off my pain meds and still feel very depressed. But I know this is not the cause of my depression. Just like you, I've tried every drug in the pharmacy that the Phyc. doctors could prescribe except the benzos that I know will work because I was taking muscle relaxers that one doctor prescribed for my muscle spasms that I had with my back trouble too. But this new pain doc I go to won't prescribe it. So I am going back again to my phyc doctor and tell him not to bother writing any other drug uless it is for benzos.... But I don't know if that will help you. It is a proven fact that pain can be causing the phycological problems such as depression. So, have you ever been on benzos's? If so and they worked, maybe go see the doc again and let him/her perscribe them for you but be careful cause of course they are addictive and that is why they don't like prescibing them. But if your position is like mine and out of desperation, I don't care if I'm addicted. I'm already taking addictive pain meds and doing well on them. If you've had benzos and they did not help try cutting down on the pain meds. Because maybe in your case the pain meds could be causing the problems since you are taking them constantly. I just came back from the doc and he gave me a shot in the knee...This is supposed to be the best stuff since sliced bread as he has told me. I have to go back to him 2 more times a week for a series of shots each week until next time which will be 6 months. You might try this. I don't know what the medication is but I'll try to find out for you. But of course I am not professional maybe you should get back to him/her and just see what happens even though you think they won't help. If the shots help you won't need to take as many pain meds. Well, I hope this will help you. Sooo....GOOD LUCK,
Dont know what benzos are but I am willing to try anything. They want me to have knee surgery and I am terrified of the MRI, the hospital, any new doctors, or places. I have gotten a friends script for adderral, that seems to help a lot but I am not one to take other's meds per say so that is just temporary for now. I don't know I am going to try to get some rest and think things through first of the week. Good luck
Hi Mtm - can totally sympathise with the whole depression/pain thing, they make each other worse in my experience, and if a doctor wont give you the meds that actualy help of course thats going to make you frustrated and angry and contribute to your pain and depression!
you say you have 'a friends script for adderal' - I may well be mistaken but isnt adderal a drug for ADHD or hyperactivity - isnt it a stimulant? If so - I would very much warn against it - It may temporarily lift your mood and give you energy, but any stimulant is going to make your depression much, much worse - and may well add paranoia, anxiety and confused thinking to your troubles. I know its tempting - but taking someone elses meds is never advisable if you have a complex medical history - you just dont know all the interactions that can ocur and it could be very dangerous.
If your GP is really unhelpful, you can change your GP, change practices if need be - you can ask different surgeries to come in and discuss joining their list to get an idea if theres one that might be more help to you? Some GPs are much too cautious around pain meds/benzo's. But others are much more understanding so shop around!