Anxiety and medication journeys

Mental health
1

I've started this thread as the other one "Any one taking Escitilopram and Mirtazapine " has got so long.

A bit of my background.

I am 57 and have suffered from anxiety and depression for many years.

This escalated when I was diagnosed with breast cancer aged 43.

It escalated again when I lost my mum last year.

I was initially taking Citalopram, Tamazepam, and Zopiclone.

This was after a while changed to, Citalopram, Diazepam and Zolpidem.

After a few years, I was changed to a different AD, but after a few months it was obvious it wasn't working for me.

I was then put on Sertraline, which I could not tolerate at all.

I was then put on Trazadone along with Diazepam still.

This worked well, until on a visit to my GP at the end of May I mentioned my anxiety had been playing up again.

He took me off Trazadone cold turkey..... big mistake!

Put me on Mirtazapine, after a few weeks increased the Mirtazapine which sent my anxiety rocketing!

I was referred to the mental health nurse specialist at my surgery who told me to taper off Mirtazapine and introduced Escitilopram at 10mg daily.

For two weeks I was a wreck, I had horrendous withdrawal from the Trazadone and on top of that withdrawal from Mirtazapine and side effects from starting Escitilopram!

My GP then introduced Quetiapine too, as I was running on pure adrenaline , having daily panic attacks etc.,

So now I am currently on,

Escitilopram, Diazepam and Quetiapine.

Things appear to be settling down, into my 6th week of Escitilopram.

But my sleep is still a big issue, go off to sleep but am awake a few hours later!

Well that's my background of my journey with Anxiety and medication, I have a appointment with the mental health nurse specialist this afternoon, so will see what he has to say.

2

Hi Karen good to see a new thread couldn't keep up with the old one lol.Glad to see your improving.l hope Nikki and Ann are too.

3

Hi Karen

Found it! I hope your appointment goes ok this afternoon, thinking of you.

I had a rocky start but have had a couple of relatively productive and calm ish hours! Now can feel anxiety coming on. 

Will rest as best I can for a bit and write more later X

4

Found you. Thanks. Also good to see your journey again too, it all helps.

Hope you get on ok with nurse today, i think they will be pleased with you as you sound a bit better. Only my opinion but keeping fingers crossed for you.

5

Hi Nikki,

How's your day been?

Mental health nurse specialist was very pleased with me, said long term they would like to see me off Diazepam and Quetiapine but not for ages yet..... thank goodness 😅 

He thinks the Escitilopram is starting to do its stuff, said it can be up to 7-9 weeks before it kicks in properly!!

Didn't have any answers regarding my sleep though, guess I'll just have to live with it!

Was talking to my neighbour earlier, her husband has a lot of health problems and amongst other medications is on Sertraline, apparently they tried him on Mirtazapine and he was pacing and awful on it, fortunately they took him off it pretty quick so he didn't get any withdrawal symptoms.

Seems Mirtazapine really doesn't suit a lot of people!

Hugs 🤗 

6

Hi Ann,

How's your day been?

Yes, my mental health nurse specialist was happy with me, is not changing any medication, though did say in the future they would like me off Diazepam and Quetiapine, but fortunately that won't be for ages yet!

Didn't really have any answers regarding my sleep, so guess I'll just have to live with it!!

Hugs 🤗 

7

Hi Karen

That's really positive about your review with the nurse. Such good news! Though I know today can't be easy and I've been thinking of you.

That's good there's no rush to be off the supporting meds!!

I had my usual difficult afternoon with no sleep and the unsettling stuff as I was trying to drift off. This really bothers me and it's one big thing I'm going to raise next week. That and night time sleep and anxiety!

Something is different but I'm still struggling. The biggest impact is the effect all this is having on my physical health as my mobility is badly affected now and I can't handle any trips out as they leave me fatigued but with adrenaline racing and I'm unable to rest properly and then the anxiety is worse! I can't even begin to access anything that might be beneficial to my mental health and self esteem while like this as I'm so debilitated with the ME/CFS.

I'm hoping and praying there's a solution.

That's interesting about your neighbour's husband. I can't face coming off Mirtazipine if I have to as been on it now 4 months at different doses and in combination with different things. But I want the best solution for my issues.

I hope you're doing ok this evening X

8

Thank you Nikki,

It has been a emotional rollercoaster of a day, but my mental health nurse specialist knew today was going to be like that.

So sorry you've had another difficult afternoon, I wonder what's causing these racing thoughts and heightened anxiety?

I think you definitely need to bring it up next week.

With your other health problems this and lack of sleep and rest is affecting you badly, and that really is not good!

I've told my mental health nurse specialist that there is no point in me doing the talking therapy at the moment as my mind set is not right, thankfully he agreed with me.

He said I still had a long way to go!.....ironically he suffers from low grade anxiety too and is very open about it!

I hope you have a better night.

Hugs 🤗 

9

Thanks Karen.

That's good you expressed your needs around not having talking therapy at the moment and that the nurse agreed. Well done!

It must have been a roller today. You are doing so well what with everything you've had to deal with including the medication withdrawal nightmare!

In the past I was put on low dose clonazepam for sleep. It was brilliant. But I had no idea what it was and when the time came that I felt better a couple of years later I weaned myself off everything  super slowly and was ok (I was on 45mg Mirtazipine plus another anti depressant plus clonazepam! I had reached crisis point with depression and anxiety though as had been severely ill with the ME for three years).

There's some part of me that wonders if the clonazepam would help me now but it's heavy duty. 

I'm going on. Just sharing my thoughts.

Here's to an ok night all round X

10

Hi Nikki,

Could you ask about the Clonazepam next week, I'm not familiar with that medication but if it helped you before maybe it's a consideration?

Thank you for your kind words, I went to the churchyard after the Drs and took flowers and had a chat with mum 😢

I hope you have a restful night.

Hugs 🤗 

11

I did think of you going to the churchyard with flowers for your mum. 😔 ❤️ I really feel for you Xx big hugs x

12

Hi there,

  thats great about your Appt with nurse and thry must see you are in a better place now.  I am still dropping down the mirtaz and having some anxiety with it.  Feel the avoidance creeps in.  Taking about 3mg in daytime.  Dr says stop mirtaz and use the diaz to hel me through the anxious times.  Shes away on holiday so wont see her  (GP). For two mor weeks.  I am just not sure how i will manage on no mirtaz and just Diaz.  She also like yours did, suggested we wait and come off it at a later date.

Managed to get to shops yesterday just local but walked about a bit and after my 3mg felt a bit better.

hope your sleep improves just takes time i suppose.

suns out here.

13

hi

you had a hard day yesterday. I know what its like feeling that anxiety and not being in control.  Waking after mirtaz I have crazy dreams and feel,very anxious.  Im sure its the med. do you wake up feeling bad

Hopefully you will get something for your sleep soon and that will help,uou feel better.  We dont realise how much sleep affects us until we lose it.

hoping too that you can get out even for a short while, i know how difficult it is for you.

this is such a hidden illness isnt it, people around just go about their daily life and dont even think about it.

i dont know how i would manage without the diazepam for anxiety, as Karen says, it will have to be dealt with at a later stage.

are you still taking the mirtazapine?  I wonder, for me, if thats my problem, its too stimulating for the brain.  Only time will tell but i dont feel any better in that respect having dropped down from 15 to 5mg.  Anyway, ploughing on awaiting my appt in October.  I think he has tried so many ssris that he might use an maoi which i dread as your diet is severely restricted, no cheese, bacon, ham, etc. Hey ho, just got to get on.

Have a better day, sleep,when you can.

 

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Aww Thank you Nikki ❤️

Actually slept until 6am today!!

How was your night?

Hugs 🤗 

15

Hi Ann,

I sometimes wonder if these professionals actually know what they are doing!

It's always like, try this pill try that pill, stop this, start that...... and it just messes us up even more!!

I don't see how Diazepam alone will help, although it's great and practically instantaneous in its affect, a AD builds up in your system for , hopefully long term relief?!

It's good you got out 😊

Hope today is better for you.

Hugs 🤗 

16

Hi Ann

Thank you for your understanding words. They mean a lot.

I do wake with anxiety and a racing head. It's less than it was but it's still hard. I'm restless all day unless I take a diazepam, which I'm doing more now as it's the only way to get through. 

I can't work out whatnis helping and what isn't but I do know since I've been on Mirtazipine without the pregabalin it's been problematic. I'm now 4 weeks on 10mg escitalopram and 15mg Mirtazipine and I'm far from relaxed or feeling any sense of calm without a diazepam. Plus the insomnia. So I do wonder if the Mirtazipine is too stimulating as you say. If it's not helping me I'll need to come off it but have read so many horror stories about that! How long were you on Mirtazipine before reducing it Ann? 

I feel sure there will be something to help you medication wise Ann. The thought of an maoi must be daunting but it might not be what he suggests. 

I still think escitalopram is a good med. Just my feeling.

X

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That's great news!

I took 2xzopicline last night, took a while to drop off but slept til 5 ish I think then in and out of sleep til 8 or so. Not ideal but I'm hoping I'll get some answers on Wed and a plan. I'm scared it might involve coming off Mirtazipine though I feel it's not a good med for me. I'll need something to help my sleep for sure!

Hugs back to you 🤗

18

Hi, i dropped down slightly lower on mirtaz last night and had a terrible,sleep.  Ended up with extra 2mg diaz just to get back to sleep. Woke today with ideation not wanting to be here as its all so difficult and anxiety still there. Dont feel like seeing family or friends.  What a life. I am not sure if its the mirtazapine which is causing all this and if i can get off it maybe these things will slowly return to normal.  Are these withdrawal symptoms, imjust dont know, and i think all the psych will do is hand out another med which will send my off again.  So confused by it all and can see i havent been right since introduction of these pills.  Wish there was someone who understood the whole scenario.

anyway, another day, hoping to get through without too much hassle.

hope you are feeling ok - domyou feel mirtazapine is the problem out of interest?  You are on escitalopram arent you?  Maybe it would be better on its own.

need an expert here- anyone out there?

19

you are so right. 

I feel really messed up by these 'professionals' wish i had never been to see them.

getting off this mirtazapine is a real killer as many have said, i can only echo that.

hope you are continuing to do ok.

20

Hi Ann

I'm so sorry you've had another bad night and have woken with those thoughts. I struggle with those at some point most days because of the endless feeling and not knowing what is going to help or what's causing me to struggle so much. 

I think when you reduce or increase a medication those thoughts can come strongly. I know when I increased the Mirtazipine they were overwhelming! I never had them when I started the escitalopram in the past.

It is very confusing and I'm with you on that.

My feeling is it's the dose change making you think like that. I know it's awful. I wonder if you need to stick with the dose you're at for the time being? I know it's not helping but maybe dropping it is too much without the help of support, guidance and a plan from the psychiatrist. 

Either that or you try a tiny reduction every few nights. 

I'm just getting through hour by hour. Knowing I'll probably have another change to deal with eventually unless this combination settles for me.

I don't think the Mirtazipine is right for me in truth. 

I'm sending a big hug X