Anxiety and Stress? Or onset of menopause?

I am a 46 year old mother of four. I was sterilized 13 years ago. I have always had relatively heavy periods, but regular every 26 days. I am no stranger to PMS, mainly breast tenderness and irritability ten days to a week before. 5 years ago I was diagnosed with endometriosis after exploratory surgery. I sought medical advice as my blood loss had become very clotty. No other presenting symptoms. As the condition was manageable, I didn't elect to go for any medical intervention.

I also suffer from psoriasis of the scalp. After much trial and error I now control this with coconut oil. This has been on going since my mid twenties.

Both of the above medical conditions act as a barometer to indicate my stress levels. And so it remains.

Recently I have undergone significant levels of stress. Two of my children have left home, one to live on the other side of the world, my mother has been undergoing treatment for cancer and my father is too immobile to care for her entirely. I am preparing to move house having just gone through the whole house sale rubbish. I run my own business which is feeling the recession, plus I am in a relatively new relationship. I am still a mum to two teenage boys, who are also feeling the effects of siblings moving on and who obviously look to me for continuing support. I accept all of this and get on with it, however I appreciate it is a mother load, which has recently been reflected in the above two medical conditions.

However, I have recently begun to suffer with insomnia. A normal nights sleep over the past four months has been less than four hours a night, with no set four hours. Ie I can sleep when I go to bed and wake at 3, or I can not fall asleep until then. Or it can be entirely broken and sporadic. I am familiar with relaxation techniques and have tried these to no avail. I am knackered.

Since Christmas, I have had a cold, a stomach upset and now a boil has appeared in the middle of my psoriasis. I don't think this is surprising.

Everyone is suddenly an expert, my mother and my partner suggest I am menopausal. My doctor also said the same without conducting any tests whatsoever. I have no other presenting symptoms, no hot flashes, night sweats, irregular periods, weight gain etc.

As all the experts in my life point out, irrational thought is a symptom, so I am interested to see what others think. For the record, I don't feel irrational.

I feel so sorry for you, you have an overload of stress. I am no medical expert but have you tried CBT (cognitive Behavioral Therapy)? My husband suffered a stress overload, which resulted in health problems. The CBT sessions taught him to understand the relationship between stress, pain and the effects it has on the body. It also taught him techniques on coping. The reason I say this is that he too suffered from severe insomnia (as well as stress)

Kind regards

Thank you for your comments, Linda. Thank you especially for not mentioning the m word ;-) Yes, I am aware of cbt, and I have employed it in the past. I guess I hoped for a more sympathetic response from my gp rather than a time of life response...

What techniques did your husband employ to combat insomnia?

Hi again. My husband undertook the CBT one to one. This was important, rather than a group, as the therapist and my husband worked together to assess what actions to take to deal with stress. The main 'key' was to deal with stress head on. Ruminating on stressful issues causes insomnia - you have to learn to give advice to the people who are causing the stress, if your advice is not taken, then you 'walk away' and do not keep on addressing it with the person . Also he made a list of stressful things e.g. job and then decided what options he has to deal with them.

One other thing, leave a note book by your bed and jot down worries so you can cast them off your your subconsious when you worry that you will forget, this will hopefully allow you to sleep.