I’m in a relationship and it’s a really good one. I love my boyfriend so much and am attached and all of this other stuff. One day I go to sleep and wake up and have this anxiety and weird thoughts about him. Thoughts that say I don’t love him, don’t want him, and that he’s unattractive. The thoughts go based off his appearance and I can’t feel what I used to at the moment.
All I am is numb and get anxiety when he text. I look at videos of us trying to remind myself, but get it as well. Is it my depression making me think and feel these things? Will I feel normal for him again once it passes? I just want to be alone and break up with him, but it’s like I know I’ll be hurt in the end because I’m just confused at the moment and need help.
I’ve been feeling like this for 2 1/2 weeks now and it won’t go away. I’m really scared of what it may be. I feel disconnected from myself and detached from him and that loving feeling I once had. All I can ever tell him is “I’m sorry”. It’s all too hard for me to handle right now and I’ve never really gone through this before.
I’ve been depressed I think, but this time around it feels like I’ve forgotten who I love most which sucks.