It started in back in November after working a long day in the cold I️ thought I️ had hypothermia and felt like I️ might faint or pass out. Warmed up problem went away. It Came back then I️ went on google to check hypothermia symptoms and read about people reverse undressing which I️ rolled down the windows of my car despite being very cold to try to stay awake. Ended up taking myself to the emergency room and they said I️ was fine and may have had a panic attack. Then that night I️ took an Ativan prescribed to my mom .5 mg out of it the next day this was on Nov. 12. Then on nov 13 I️ took another Ativan for no real reason. Next day I️ had school (college student) and felt like I️ was hit by a train and was very worried why I️ was so tired/low energy. My mom explained that’s what Ativan does and she was shocked I️ even got out of bed that day. For the next week I️ was dead tired and I️ thought I️ might have had mono but I️ had no symptoms other than just being super tired and having a little brain fog. Went to the GP nov 22 and he said no mono maybe a virus because I️ said I️ felt slightly better. The tiredness never went away but the brain fog stayed but was not as bad. I️ had a lack of motivation for school and my sleep habits changed from going to sleep around 11pm and waking between 7-9 am to being up until at least 2 am and sleeping until noon. Then one day I️ had what I️ believe to be a panic attack in the grocery store, I️ out of nowhere felt faint and dizzy and thought this was the end. My mom talked me down and I️ felt a little better. This general feeling continued then one night I️ believe December 5th I️ talked to my mom about my problems and how I️ felt then for some reason everything looked strange and I️ had this strange feeling that I️ had really died back on the day of my original panic attack. Then I️ had a panic attack again afraid it was over. Took an Ativan then calmed down and talked to my mom about how my fears may be coming from the thought of death and how I️ I’m scared of it. Then my fear shifted to having a brain tumor, which stems from earlier this summer when I️ had an ice pick headache for two days that went away. I️ worried this was the cause of everything and started getting headaches, even though I️ told myself that the headaches moved all around my head (from one side to another, to the front) and that brain tumors don’t move so the headache probably wouldn’t either and that at my age (19) they’re highly unlikely. Then my normal anxiety continued of feeling kind of spaced out. On December 9th I️ began taking St. John’s wort but only half a dose because I️ heard it does good for anxiety/depression. Then on December 14 I️ had the scariest one, everything seemed to move in slow motion. I think this might have been caused because I️ was afraid of losing touch with reality which reminded of a time where I️ smoked marijuana and everything moved slow and looked weird almost out of body and I️ had no control and thought my brain was fried, which was the single most scariest moment I️ ever experienced. I️ doubt this is the root cause that was almost two years ago. Back to the slow motion feeling it’s like I️ and everything was just slowed down. I️ thought this was it, it’s the end. Panicked BAD, worst one I️ had. Took an Ativan and calmed down. Looked up depersonalization/Derealisation and thought maybe this is why. On December 15 I️ was worried it might happen again with my friends and they started to look weird and almost robotic like. I️ took a half Ativan and calmed down. Then the next day during a final exam the slow motion losing reality situation came. My heart rate kicked up and I️ quickly finished my test, found a quiet place to sit and shut my eyes and felt like I️ defeated my oncoming attack. I️ worked and felt like the slow motion feeling came back but I️ feel like now it’s my mid playing a trick on me and perceiving stuff as being slow. I️ stayed calm and go through the day and thought I️ made a real breakthrough. I️ stopped taking St. John’s wort at this point for two days. Now today and last night (16/17 of December) I️ feel the feelings of depersonalization more like I’m not here and nothing’s real however before I think my anxiety caused it now I️ think the fear of it is causing the anxiety. I️ try to convince myself that this is real and I’m fine but I️ can’t shake it. I️ started to type this and it it hit me hard and I️ had to abruptly leave my friends house. It’s now effecting my social life and functioning, however it did before now I️ feel like I️ can’t handle it. I️ started the SJW again and I️ don’t know if that contributes. Started to think I️ could possibly be depressed though I️ have no reason to be other than these feelings. I️ think I️ always had a slight bit of SAD because my mood is always low and I️ dread the sun going down before 5pm. I️ feel like it’s time to go back to the GP and tell him how I’ve been since my last visit and see if that helps. However my mom thinks it’s just something I️ have to defeat I️ my mind. I️ also want to make a counseling appointment at my university but I️ don’t know if I️ can with winter break coming up. I’m also afraid of going to the doctors and them prescribing me a pill that will have me hooked, I️ don’t know what to do and I’m starting to lose hope of ever going back to normal. The slow motion/ non real felling is the worst because I️ haven’t seen anyone else say they feel this way. Now I’m afraid it is an underlying cause like a tumor or something like that idk I’m just scared. Thinking about taking a half Ativan now to see if it goes away. Can anxiety be the cause of this. Please help. Sorry if this is like a book but I️ felt it may help to write all of this down. Also sorry about the explanation point/question mark if it makes it hard to read its read as eye as in me. Don’t know why the iPhone does this.
First off...please stop self-medicating. And googling. Two reasons: one is obviously as it is harming you and your perception. Secondly it clouds up your clinical picture making it really tricky for a doctor to establish the best approach if treatment is needed.
The only thing you need to worry about is getting back on track. Anxiety escalations are very common at your age. About getting back on track then - this is achieved by proceeding as per the above; contacting a doctor (preferably competent psychiatrist) to assess whether or not you need assistance at this time; making sure your sleep is regular and that your diet is healthy and easy to digest; cutting out any stimulants (e.g. overdoing coffee, energy drinks or soft drinks - cut back), cutting out any depressants (medication, supplements and alcohol); no recreational drugs; cutting back on processed foods and especially crisps and candy; avoid sitting and pondering your feelings - do practical little mundane things to ground you.
In addition, and out of curiosity, have you recently started taking any new supplements or the contraceptive pill?
Have you recently had any blood tests done?
uuum...no editing tools here - just saw the nick is Jason so I will assume you have not recently started taking the contraceptive pill Other queries remain.
Jason
You should leave someones medication alone. Medications are selected for that patient, not for you and some medications for other health problems can cause real problems with your health.
I would advise that you talk to your GP, reading into your post you have problems with Anxiety and you do need your own treatment plan.
Make a double appointment, take a list of your fears concerns, Anxiety and any associated anxiety.
There is nothing too fear with a visit to see your Doctor, He is in partnership with yo for any health problems and He will also stand and listen to your problems. Be brave and get seen. One small step and you will be on your way to feel more able to live your life
BOB