Anxiety from working with father in law??

Mental health
1

Hi everyone

Need some advice I've worked for my father in law for about 5 years and I can't stand it and I don't get on with him at all he's very controlling and puts pressure on mine and my wife's (his daughters) relationship as I know she is scared of him , I feel I'm stuck when I'm around him I feel very anxious and feel I have to act differently as we have nothing in common.

Ive know come to the point we're I feel I need to get a new job but I'm scared to have the conversation with my wife as I don't want it to have an impact on our relationship but I know I've got to do it.

Every time I mention anything about it she says she hasn't time to talk about it and that I have to just get on with it for money reasons.

I don't care about money at this point I've always looked after my family and they get what they want in another job surely it would be the same.

I'm worried to take that step but I know I have to do I need to man up and just do it ???

2

Hi Tom start looking for a new job and get the process started.Then sit your wife down and tell her how you feel and explain how anxious you feel.Your wife has to face the fact your mental health is at stake here.It will not be easy but take the bull by the horns and do it.Good luck

3

Thanks for your reply Marleen, I'm just scared to take that step . In my head I believe nothing ever good can happen as I'm so negative i feel I have to do this though not just for me but for my family as I'm so stressed and anxious all the time.

4

I know it is difficult but think how good you will feel when you escape that toxic situation.Focus on that and get started.No time like the present

5

I feel so weird and anxious when I'm around him I feel he's always waiting to pick up on any mistakes I make so I feel on edge

6

I work with my father and when things are bad it is very off putting to have that conversation with it being family. You sound like you have thought about this for a while. Look for another job and if one comes up you need to be honest about how you feel. You can be dignified and not cause a rift I'm sure! Your wife should support you and there is no need to make it about personality just about the job role itself!

7

Thanks Bella it's on my mind 24/7 I feel I've just had enough

8

Yeah talk to her about it. She should understand you tell her how you feel about the whole situation. Get a new job that way she won't have anything to say. Not being mean but sometimes you have to do these things. Remain direct and stern and be asertive at all times so she won't evade you talking about her dad. Dont be mean about it though be kind you don't want to start a confrontation with her. Be respectful at the end of the day it's her dad we are talking about. Don't worry be happy -Bob Marley Everything will work out fine.

9

Sounds like he is jealous of you because you are with his daughter so he trys to belittle you. Some fathers get jealous of their son in laws.

10

Thanks so much for the reply Ashley , I've got my mind set on getting a new job I feel I will be released , I dread work at the moment . Mayb this is main cause of all my stress and anxiety holding it all in 😬

11

I agree once you get that new job you will feel much better and happier. The stress and Anxiety will go away. Wish you luck Tom.