Hi Tay,
I know exactly what you must be going through.
Right from the time I was a baby I was travel-sick, and when someone told my mum it was all in the mind she said, how can it be, she's too young to know! Before every car journey, right into my teens, I would have to take Junior Joyrides (tiny raspberry-flavoured pills that turned me into a sleepy zombie with a dry mouth for hours - but they worked! My mum always took an adult version, but in my teens we discovered that Diocalms seemed to work just as well (as one of the side effects was an upset stomach before the journey) but without the side effects.
Looking back, I think there was a certain placebo effect with them. Anyway, in my late teens I went on a school trip of about 40 miles. It was only our A-level class so we used a minibus but we were a seat short. As I was about the last to turn up I was stuck on the make-shift seat at the very back of the vehicle, in the aisle - the worst place to be for someone with motion sickness!
Needless to say, I only made it about 20 miles or so when I was horribly travel sick over the newspaper of the only teacher I ever had a crush on! I could not have felt more mortified! They made sure I had a front seat for the return journey!
However, the damage was done.For many years after that event I suffered full-blown panic attacks at the start of every car journey (I avoided buses like the plague). I would take the diocalms to counteract the runs which happened every time, but my mind would be in a whirl of "what if" I disgrace myself by being sick again...
Every journey, even with my parents, would be a nightmare for me but I never let them know how bad I was feeling. First my lips and fingers would start to tingle, then it would spread into my hands and feet. My breathing must have been shallow and rapid but I was just intent on not being sick. The tingling would turn to almost numb and my hands would become clawed and rigid, and my lips would be so stiff I couldn't speak. Eventually, my queaziness would begin to lessen and the life would return to my extemities. After that, I found I could begin to enjoy the passing scenery and I was fine for the rest of the journey, however long it was! I was never in such a state on the return journey!
The trouble was, these same panicky feelings would assail me before any event, large or small, where I would be afraid to be publicly sick - I started avoiding school assemblies - that was easy in the 6th form. Getting a boyfriend meant going to his family gatherings, journeys, cinema, concerts / plays - all terrifying and panic-attack inducing. Somehow I got through all these things (if I couldn't avoid them) but life wasn't comfortable.
It was years before I ever confided in a boyfriend, but I felt I had to because of his work's Christmas parties and family meals out - and our looming wedding! He was ok with it and we just avoided cinemas and bus travel etc. I learnt to use ginger biscuits to combat queaziness and to consciously try and breathe through the initial panicky feelings and I guess I sort of outgrew the worst of the feelings.
When faced with flying for the first time at the age of 35, I sought help from the chemist and got some tiny calming pills from the herbal section to take several weeks before the flight. I took the trusty Diocalms before the dreaded taxi to the airport and I was fine - just a mild panic attack until I saw the miniature world beneath the plane and started to enjoy the novelty! That holiday I was faced with travel across Canada by planes, bus, train, car and even boat - and there were times when I got panicky and queazy. The weird thing was that I was happier at the very back of the bus - probably because I was behind most of the rest of the passengers and I was next to the loo and coolbox of drinks if needed.
Sorry this is such a long-winded reply, but I hope it goes to show you are in no way alone in this? I found that having supplies of water, ginger biscuits (any ginger product should help), mints and a paper bag inside a polythene bag (should the worst happen) all helped to make journeys more comfortable. I once read that in the case of travel sickness, if you know you can be sick (if you are prepared with bags etc) then you won't be - it takes some of the worry out of it so you aren't dwelling on the mess you'll make if you're sick, and you can concentrate on the scenery or music - I always feel better from the start if I have my favourite music to listen to.
Last year we went to Ireland - I was in the back of the car for 3 hours to Holyhead, then over 3 hours on a ferry, then in the back of the car again for another 2.5 hours - all on one dose of Immodium Instant with no ill effects apart from feeling a bit weird on the ferry for the first 20 minutes or so!
I am 49 and suffering peri-menopause-caused anxieties now - but I got through over 30 years of panic attacks with the help of ginger, anti-diarhoea tablets, and confiding in those closest to me. It was very difficult to start with. I have been told that motion sickness can wane naturally as we get older - I know that a lot of the trouble can be in the mind - the most difficult part of our bodies to deal with!
I hope my waffling helps you a bit? If you managed to stay awake!
Good luck x