This is kind of an odd question. I haven't posted on here in a bit, because my condition has been improving to some extent.
Regardless of the progress I've made, I do still have a lot of mini-worries and health scares that tend to come up regularly. I always tend to think that I'll be able to relax when the current issue is resolved, but then a new issue usually arises. I've realized that I've gotten so used to being anxious, that the idea of just letting go and being fully happy and relaxed, is kind of scary. In some weird way, I feel as if being on edge and hyper-vigilant is making me safer. It makes no sense, but I feel afraid to let go of the tension.
I recently started cognitive behavioral therapy, and I'm beginning to recognize a lot of my thought patterns with greater clarity now. I'm wondering if other anxiety sufferers also feel reluctant to fully relax and just enjoy themselves, even if there is no pressing concern at the moment. It's not like I have no pleasure in life, but there is always some kind of underlying worry or problem (usually invented or heavily exaggerated), and without that I feel like I'm leaving myself open to something awful, mostly regarding my health, since my anxiety is largely health centered.
O Steven I no that won well so I mastered the art of self sabotage so if there is no drama I create it
I've been suffering from anxiety since I was 3 years old. I don't know what the real me is like. I wouldn't know how to let go of anxiety and panic disorder.
I'm glad you are happier and enjoying yourself.
I can relate, I've also had anxiety issues from a very young age. Sometimes it's debilitating, and sometimes it goes into remission. I spent the past several months having constant panic attacks, was in the emergency room three times thinking I was dying, but more recently I've been making some progress. It's still hard to fully "let go", so to speak. I wish you the best of luck in your own struggle!
Hi Steven,
I know what you are experiencing all too well. I have spent many years waiting for the other shoe to drop. Instead of being happy and grateful for the blessings I was given, I too, felt if I gave in to the happiness it would turn bad. So, then why not think the worse so when it happened I was prepared!!!
Of course I carried that thought process with my health as well. Health is always the trigger for my anxiety. I am 60 now and with the help of a medication, a great anxiety coach, meditating, deep breathing and training your mind to shift its thoughts and I have been a new person!! I truly enjoy every experience in my life now because you know what?? Whether we "protect" and "prepare" ourselves for the worse or just ride the wave without thinking of the worst it doesn't change the outcome of the situation... just makes you miss out on the joys we can experience!!!
Just my thoughts! Much luck....be happy it is a wonderful thing!!!!
Linda
Hi there
i wanted to say well done you!!
You’ve managed what I can’t quite do worry about what’s going to happen next!
If something bad happens would I be able to stop it.. probably not!! Though it terrifies me as I’ve shocks in my life I just am on edge waiting for the next thing.
I have missed out on a lot because of this. I’m seeking help we’ll on waiting list.
i wish you well and hope that I too one day will be a different me.
what a great post
Vicky
Thanx Steven I appreciate your good wishes. "And the beat goes on."
Best to you as well.