been with my boyfriend for a year and a half, we are usually very intimate but lately I don't even want to be touched by him. I tell him it's bc of my depression and If he tries something I make him stop and he gets sad bc he feels I am less attracted to him. Did this happen with anyone else? What do I do
Hi jesse
I don't know your age but I guess your younger than me..
We have different stories but I just wanted to say my experience as it's slightly the same but was years ago for me
I know what you mean I've felt that at times with my ex hysband. When my depression was really bad I withdrew a lot from others and him.
It was noticeable to him but he never understood depression.
May I ask do u feel the same way about him as you did when you first met?
when he touches you you say it's your depression. Is it due to you feeling low with depression?
When mine was really bad I didn't want him near me. So then he stopped trying and the intimacy stopped. It never came back. Though at times I yearned for his touch and love.
I'm in a new relationship now.
All I can say is you need to comunicate with him if you love him and want to work at this.
How do you start?? Difficult one but if you don't feel like being intimate say how you feel at that time.
He will think it's him that would be normal it would be if it was the other way around I'm sure.
I have to say with depression sometimes you don't feel like doing anything let alone that!!
It's a hard one but do you think you could start by maybe going on a date with him sound silly but sometimes life gets in the way and it's gets to a boring routine and you get stuck in it!!
Take care
Vicky
I know I said communication and that really is it if you can talk trough your thoughts with him it may help you both.
Thankyou so much for this, it helped me a lot to hear it
Hi Jesse
I hope you are well.
Just to give you advice from a guys perspective here, this is an extremely common thing that happens to almost every couple there has been (at some point).
Something I think that is very important is that you let him know this is happening because of the way your depression makes you feel sometimes, which should reassure him that it is not HIM you feel bad about.
Another thing which might be helpful is if you be as open as you can about tour emotions and feelings. This way he won't feel as hurt and will most likely understand the situation better.
Good luck and I hope this helps.