I am on week 4 of my group therapy which is suppose to assist me in recognizing and controlling the intensity of my emotions due to bpd and adjustment disorder. I am finding this a struggle after each session I feel so inadequate, useless, stupid a fraud I don't think I'm ill. Following today's after leaving I was ready to jump into the river as I am a fraud etc I am wasting resources and nhs money. I struggle to concentrate, get overwhelmed and just feel so I don't know how to put it into words which is another thing we are suppose to do. My mind shuts down, can't think, I just want to run and not stop until I fall off the end of the earth. I am just so f**** stupid.
No one needs to comment the only positive today for the people that have been following I do not have lung cancer, it was sarcoidosis, which is improving I've just got to see the positive of this even though I still feel like s***at times. Hope you are doing ok, you know who i mean. Take care everyone. X