This is my story and why I've posted it online. My name is jordan I am 24 year old male. Over a year now I have suffered from (G,A,D) generalised anxiety disorder brought on from (P,T,S,D), over the past month or two it's has gone from something I can live with to something I am really struggling to deal with. I work for the ambulance service and I work pretty much all the time and shifts that are all over the place, that is why I am posting this online I don't have time for friends and I have no one to talk to about this, and all I get when I do try to mention it is, " it's not that bad we all are stressed " so that doesn't help. Over the past month or two my anxiety and panic disorder has gone crazy to where I am having anxiety and panic attacks ever day or every other day, I had one 4 days ago that carried on for half an hour and I ended up going to A&E I thought it was somthing serious, my symptoms when having an attack are, racing and pounding heart, breathlessness, tingling arms, pains in the chest, feeling like am not taking in enough oxygen, the worst fear you can imagion immense feeling of dread, feeling as tho am literally going to die. It's just getting so scary and horrible to live with to top it all off I am going through a very tough time with multiple things going on in my life that don't help the situation. Please tell me am not on my own.
Hi Jordan,
I understand where you are coming from and can assure you that you are not alone. Unfortunately I have found that unless you suffer with anxiety, it is difficult to understand and empathise with those who do. When I get panic attacks, it’s mainly the not being able to breathe and the sense of dread and guilt and I am unable to shake it for what seems like hours. I have even limited the amount of alcohol I can drink because I know if I get a hangover I will be in such a state that I can’t speak to anyone or leave the house.
I wish I could offer you some words of wisdom or some strategies that will help ease the anxiety but I am on here myself to find help and ways to manage it all.
But just remember you aren’t alone.
Hi Sophie,
Thank you for your reply, I know what you are saying. What really gets me is bcoz of my line if work I have endless amounts of training and qualifications in mental health and understanding of it all, but when it comes to my self I am like a fish out of water. I just don't know what to do or how to help my self. It's such a cruel thing to deal with and I feel better (without sounding mean) hearing from people that suffer with it as well, G,A,D is horrible and mix that in with panick disorder as well makes it a nightmare. I find that my concentration levels are through the floor, I literally can't concentrate long enough to read one page of a book on my good days. Even when am not on edge, panicking or worrying but even my good days are bad days. Just want to find my paradise and get back to normal.
Thank you for your reply and telling me a little of your story,
Hi Jordan, You are not alone in this. I am so sorry you are dealing with anxiety. There are so very many of us on here going through a similar situation.
I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression almost 3 years ago. It has been miserable.
I understand the horrid dread.
You really should see your doctor. He can help you with a plan of action to feel better. He may recommend meds and / or therapy. I do both.
GAD since I was 24. Im 46 now. Its a tough time the first time in your life. If it persists throughout your life, it won't be as bad and goes away for years. I am going through a 2monther right now.
I am on serzone (3 weeks) and clonapin in the morning to help get through this bout. Usually takes me 3 3/12 months to recover. No Caffine, working out, mindfulness, good books like "DARE". It all helps.
I start a new job in 2 weeks. I just broke up with my girlfriend 2 months ago. Your in a crazy job, so yes, your hypersensitive. You have to bring it down but it takes a lot of time. It won't go away over night. Chill and accept it and it will go away. Thats what I'm trying to do. But its the truth.
Good luck my friend.
Rob from California.
Minibrenda. Hi thank you for the reply,
I have been to see doctors, councillors, psychotherapist I have been diagnosed with the issues I suffer with They did have a plan of action for me. I did what they said I let it run its course but when I finished they literally just wrote me off and was like good luck. And obviously I really could of lived with it at that time but now it's got 10X worse I feel like I got medical help too early if that makes sense.
Rob. Thanks for the reply.
Was a good read it makes so much sense what you say. I understand that it's a matter if time for it to come amd to go. It's been on a year now. I could deal with every other symptom but it's the sudden feeling of dread and fear that I really hate, any advice on how to stop that?
My first time it lasted a year. From then on it was only like 3-4 months. Honestly I do well on meds, if thats not your thing I would dive head first into CBT as much as possible. I do all. I climb mountains, Crossfit and all kinds of stuff but I have fear of body sensations. Thats my main issue. Not much dread. Maybe its your job? Maybe too much dread there. Sad to say but thats very stressful. I could never be a cop or anything to do with health. Just think about it.
Hi Jordan. It’s terrible I know. The sense of dread is the worst thing. I seriously wouldn’t wish the feeling on my worst enemy and I mean that with all my heart. It’s so difficult because with anxiety, we have to do most of the work. It’s not like you can take a tablet and it all goes away (well long term anyhow) so it takes DAILY meditation, breathing techniques, yoga, exercise. You need to retrain your brain. And it is a daily grind. Even when you start to feel better, and you will, you contantly need to keep up the work. What really helped me is reading books and studying anxiety and how and what it is. Then the symptoms are less worrying because you know what is going on with your body. I’m having the worst stretch of it in my life at the moment. The last month was a daily chore to move, to breath, to constantly fear the next panic attack and to always feels all day like my heart was beating out of my chest. I never wanted to get out of bed for the fear of having to talk to people or deal with anything stressful. I’m so much better the last week only, thanks to Prozac finally kicking in (it took 2 weeks of hell. Getting worse before it got better). I don’t drinks caffeine or alcohol at all ever, don’t eat sugar now either. Knowing I’m looking after myself has helped immensely. I even avoid heart pounding tv and prefer to read a book quietly now. You will figure this out but you need to work hard at it and don’t give up. I was ready to end it because I could not see how I was ever going to stop feeling so terrible. Constant feeling like a gun was at my head 24/7. Stay away from benzos long term, but small amount for a few days can bring you back to baseline while ssri’s do their thing. I take half a tablet every now and again only if I feel the dread coming. Download the Calm app. Listen to the bedtime stories. Do the breathing. You have to make sure you sleep before anything else. And BREATH. Learn how to do it properly. You are not alone my friend.
I understand what you are saying. I think I have to start working out getting fit start a hobbies again and socialise more. And that's so true. Dread and fear is probably bcoz of my job the things I see day to day it's such a morbid job at times not many nice things in my job all negatives. I am looking for a new job maybe that could cure me or make it more manageable.
Hi Tanya thank you for the reply,
It's amazing how many people have got back to me in this forum, it makes me feel much better and it's hard to explain but it's helping me understand things notice things and kinda helping me piece things together. I hear what you say it all makes sense, I am the same as u I don't have alcohol or caffeine drinks but when I do have caffeine drinks thwy really do set me off badly. I am not a big fan if taking meds bcoz as daft as it sounds I need to stay sharp as a tac for my job and I don't want anything to cloud my day at work even tho my work is one if my biggest triggers of this anxiety and panic. As far as working out goes I am slacking on that I should start it again but when u feel down u just don't want to even get up and do anything. I used to read alot but now I can't even. Read any more than a page or two, like you say as well you constantly fear the next attack you are going to have. That's my biggest problem two. The fear and dread u feel just thinking if ur next attack. It's such a vicious circle isn't it. But thabk you for your reply It's helped me out alot. Do keep an eye out for my posts I'd like to hear from.u again in the future take care keep smiling
Jordon
Have you tried Mindfulness and Breathing Techniqes, both may help your Anxiety
BOB