Hello,
As an insomniac myself I have read numerous forums about insomnia. I am at a point with my own insomnia that I feel I am at my limits… if anyone could try to offer some advice, help to calm my nerves and confirm they have being as bad and improved that would be greatly appreciated.
I am a 25 year old man who has started his first proper job with a law firm 6 months ago. I have suffered from bouts of insomnia since i first went to University back in 2017. back then it was caused by noisy house mates who kept me up very late - my stress about needing to sleep turned in to not being able to sleep at all. After a few nights of no sleep I finally righted it. Between then and the start of 2022, i would sometimes have insomnia but it was few and far between - as I was at uni I did not have to reliably get up early and thus nights I couldnt fall asleep would right themselves naturally.
since i had covid at new years 2021/22 , i had two entirely sleepless nights - i convinced myself I had the fatal prion kind and accordingly lived in hell for a few days before finallu falling alseep.
skip forward to today - i am 6 months into a job that requires me to commute in over an hour each way which means that i reliably need to be up early. i am finding that on a sunday or monday night I am now not really sleeping at all - just tossing and turning terrified i cant sleep ALL NIGHT. it really is upsetting me - how can i be in a habit of regularly not really sleeping at all in a night? is that normal with insomnia - has anyone else found when they cant sleep they just do not sleep at all?
when i cant sleep i find that i become very thirsty, my heart pounds and i need to use the bathroom frequently - do people think this sounds like the impact of the stress of not sleeping or the cause of not sleeping? something linked to cortisol levels maybe?
i have started CBT therapy for insomnia (1 session in) but despite trying to calm down and manage my worry i have found my insomnia worse.
the pattern i am in is a basically dont sleep on a Sunday or monday, things then improve between tuesday and thursday (6 - 7 hours of sleep but waking lots) and then come friday and saturday night i am out like a light even infront of the TV sleeping like a baby and dreaming vividly and then waking up with that tired feeling that comes after a deep sleep.
does this sound like normal insomnia or more like the fatal prion or some other physical cause? i know worrying about the prion kind is almost ridiculous but i think that extreme view contributes to bad nights.
finally - has anyone experienced insomnia to this level before and managed to break its back so to speak? if so what would you advise i do?
i am so totally at my wits end with this i am exhausted, scared and frankly dont feel like life is worth living on the days i have had basically no sleep! any advice would be greatly appreciated.
thanks
Matt