I am asking for you r thought s on my situation , my daughter is 18 years old , we moved area 5 years ago when she was 13 years old , for her to pursue a talent for competitive figure skating . We left everything school , family everything , a mistake I can see clearly now , under a year after moving , she got up one morning saying I am never skating again , and she hadn't . Leaving her feeling lost and alone , everything she had ever wanted disappeared that day , she has no friend no contact socially for nearly 4 years , last year she decided to volunteer at the local primary school as a way off being round people , the liked her so much there , that they have asked her to join as an apprentice teaching assistant which she said was wonderful . She loved everything about being there .however she now is doubting if this is the thing for her. I can't understand how she can be like this when she was so positive about being there , she is so popular everybody loves her , but it has no affect on her , she seems closed off from all affection from other people , and no self as teem , it is breaking my heart to see her like this , when she is so well loved . When she skated and when she was at school , she always said she s never had a real friend , I don't know how to help her !, thank for reading this , Rebekah.
Yes there is physical self harm and mental self harm, you cant handle success and it you are being successful you have to change things, I am like this frightened of success, frightened of getting to friendly with people as you fear getting hurt so distance themselves from the places or people they are familier with as they afraid of "crashing" IE failing so they get out first, perhaps it is because the think to much is expected of them. Now here is where we have a problem, your daughter would not want to admit this or seek any counciling. I am not qualified to give advice, but all I can say is take it careful, dont ruffle feathers, more love and assuring your daughter that you love her as she is, if she wants to do something let her do it and give her support. All the best, take it slowly.
Hi , thank you for your reply ,I agree with what you have said , she always says she is afraid of letting people down ect , I will take you advice , and support her in everything she does , and hopefully she will gain more confidence , thank you again for your advice and reply , best wishes Rebekah.
I hope everything goes well, as a ps,for me I have started making friends and was just starting to think, now is the time to act weird as I am not in control, so people will distance themselves, see what I mean? Thank G-d for a sence of humour.