Dear Danielle,
Hello. First of all, I will try to make this as brief as possible. I live near Boston, Mass., USA. I just happened to come across this website when looking up a medical website here in the states. I am glad I did. I would like to first tell you how very, very sorry I am about the miscarriage you had. How very sad. I have never had one but it must be very painful. However.....if I may, I would just like to tell you this short story. One night, years ago, I was warching television and a show I love....."Highway To Heaven" with Michael Landon. I loved that show. So inspiring about people and their problems and how he played an Angel sent by God to help them. One day, he had become very friendly with a sweet, kind young couple. They were having a baby and then lost it. They buried the child and afterwards, they did not feel they could go on. They were so heartbroken, naturally. Now, usually, the Angel, Michael Landon was not allowed by God to tell people "why" someone had passed on.....no matter what. However, since the couple was SO devastated and were friends' of Michael's, God ended up telling him he COULD let them know. It turned out that, had their chld lived, much later on down the road, while in his 20's or so, the child would have developed a very, very serious disease and would have suffered for many years and they would have suffered watching him. That is why God took their baby now. So that he would NOT have to go through all those years, later on of untold suffering. He would take him back Home again to be the angel that he was. Now, although the parents were naturally devastated now, Michael had certainly helped them by explaining "why" God had taken him so early and certainly, his parent's, if those were the only 2 choices, would prefer the 1st so that their son would not have to suffer so very much later on. To me, it truly made sense and I never forgot that story. Your child is now back Home and I am sure doing much better than all of us down here. Someday, you will see her once again, Danielle. However, she would not want you to see her too soon. She would prefer that being young, you continue with your life, enjoy it as much as possible and be happy and healthy. That is what she would want for you! I also hope for that also for you. Go and see a psychiatrist(who can also give you an anti-depressant if you need it along with talking about your situation and sadness). A psychologist cannot give out prescriptions of any kind. Now.....as far as the "herpes" diagnosis," we ALL run the risk of that as if we had "chicken pocks" when we were children, then we already have the herpes virus inside of us. Sometimes, it may come out on someone's lip(s) as a "cold sore." Same type of thing. They do have medication for it. However.......many, many years ago, my own gynecologist diagnosed me with the same thing! I nearly fell off the table! See, because i was not even having any sex! I kept telling him that as I sat there, suffering like heck with the horrendous pain, but he did not believe me! I was devastated. So, for about 5 years or so, I suffered with that. It was awful. Here is the kicker. I ended up going to see a "Dermatologist" just for the heck of it finally. I said, "why not?!" They deal with skin diseases! I went and was thoroughly examined when I was aving a "break out." The end result? I did NOT and NEVER did have "herpes!!" It turned out to be a type of allergy thing/yeast thing, whatever. She gave me some medication to use and after timee, I NEVER had it ever again!! Boy, was I ANGRY! I went to the gynecologist's office and gave them HELL and even had the nurse go across the hall to speak to the doctor! She could not believe that her boss had been "wrong!" HE WAS!!! I should have SUED but I did not. So........go to see a Dermatologist, also. It won't hurt to go and go when you are having a breakout. I truly hope that things work out for you, Danielle. I know they will after time. Time will help you some. Just always remember that your darling baby WANTS you to be HAPPY, Danielle......ok?! You did nothing wrong. For whatever reason, God needed another sweet Angel. Remember......she will always be with you and near you, in spirit. I do blieve that wholeheartedly. God Bless you, Danielle. Please, just value your life as it is truly a gift and many, many of us have had to go through many rough times in our lives....maybe not the same, but sometimes things that you think will take you down. Why don't you contribute something say to St. Jude's Children's Hospital for those babies in your daughter's memory? That would be so niice. You could even ask some good friends, family to donate to the children. Your daughter would be so thrilled! Take good care, Danielle. I will be praying for you. We all love you here! Write back here and let us know how you are doing, would you please? Thank you. Rascal