I have been depressed for years and always blocked it out with some sort of drug. i am now at the end of my thether i cannot cope anymore, i cant talk to my wife she is a stranger to me, my mother has her own mental health problems, my dad has dementia and is in a home, i have a beautiful daughter the only joy in my life.
i was a successful nurse but i became erractic in my behaviour i started openly stealing tramadol and injecting it, i wanted to have a seizure, i told my GP everything , i can honestly say he was not interested. i went to work to tell them i could work there no longer, they were sympathetic, asked if i could manage a week until they sorted out staff levels, i agreed. the next working day i was in i was arrested. i lost my job and career on the same day. i am now struck off from nursing, i am 41 i dont know what else to do , perhaps i got my just desserts but i was never high with my patients, i couldnt allow myself and i didnt need to be. i think i have to leave my family. i feel close to suicide. im numb.
Patrick....Please call The Samaritans and/or perhaps try taking yourself to an N A meeting.They may be ably to offer support.Have you been to N A before?There is obviously a problem there.Please get help,you're only 41 and you surely don't want to devastate your family.Keep us updated
Oh you poor thing. Are you receiving any treatment from your GP? Are yuou still taking tramadol? How recently did you lose your job? Sorry for all the questions but cannot advise you without knowing the answer to these.
Dear Patrick, plus, please, please get some help now....
Try the SAMARITANS or go to your local casualty unit immediately if you come close to...or think of harming yourself....
It must appear to be hopeless now... but. Believe you me....it truly can get better I promise you.....Please, please, please get some HELP now,
Also TRY TO NEVER EVER GIVE UP..XX
kind and sincere wishes to you,DEIRDRE...take care....
Hi sally i am abstinant and remain so but i fall off the wagon occassionally. i went to rehab it was horrible i hated it. i went to meetings they were better. i am paraylised by my depression i am a good person i spent so much of my life looking after my family and it has left me an empty shell. doctors do not understand, in fact they blame me , i cant get a break, i feel like hurting myself so someone will listen.
hi evergreen lost my job 04/04/13not worked since i do not claim benefits i have no money, i am not on opiates but i have taken diazepam recently , i am on sertraline 200 mg and mirtazapine 45 mg so max dose on both. i have been to meetings i feel like the world is like a picture or a tv show and i am looking in desperate not to feel anymore.
thank you deidre but i will think about what you have said. thank you.
Diazepam helps shortly after taking it, but it does have a 'come down'. It can produce the same symptoms as it is prescribed for treating. You can feel totally desperate once the effects of the drug wears off. Just like tramadol, I think of it as 'a borrow from Peter to pay Paul' kind of drug, in that it raises serotonin levels but that leaves a deficit for when the drug wears off, which means that you actually feel worse than you did before taking it. If you can I would avoid it.
It sounds like sertraline is not working for you. I would urge you to go back to your GP and ask to try a new AD. I would stay on the Mirt as that will help you with your sleeping.
But please ring your GP and tell them you are having suicidal thoughts. You should be treated as an emergency and should be able to see your GP the same day.
If things cannot wait until the surgery is open, then go to A and E and tell them you are thinking of killing yourself. You need help quickly.