I feel as though I am recovering well from depression now, thanks to antidepressants I believe. I no longer feel in a constant severe depression, I have a life that I am able to start doing something with and want to make use of my life. But all though I don't feel depression inside me very often anymore, I know it's still there, lingering. It's like it follows me round in my shadow or sits on my shoulder watching me, waiting for a time to pounce again. I know it's still there and it worries me how easy it could be for it to attack again. I feel it's holding me back from things for fear of depression setting in again. Holding me back from people for the fear of being let down losing them, but i don't want to live a life alone, but this is what i'm doing and I don't know why.
Know exactly how you feel although I am still in its grip, used to have a wide group of friends and dont bother with anyone anymore, I have found out just how two faced people are, even ones I have known for over 20 years, she dropped me straight away (only seen her once since my depression kicked in) as I wasnt going out on the piss and pulling with her and then she decided to get a boyfriend and thats the end of our friendship.
that really didnt do my situation any favours and still knocked back by it, I rarely leave the house and only been to a pub once since.
my doctor is referring me to a counsellor as i am not getting better even with the medication.
Oh Sunset I was really sorry to read your posting. You have been so supportive to me over the past weeks. I know you are only young, much younger than my daughter, and I would hate to think she was experiencing what you are. It sounds to me that you need to see a counsellor and I can't remember if you have been down this road.
As for me I am now into my 8th week on 30 mg but if anything I feel worse. I saw my GP and she wanted me to go on 45 mg but I said I would like to give it another 2 weeks. I am starting a group therapy on Thursday and I might try the 45 mg then. I do hope this is sorted out for you as you are too young to be suffering in this way.
Pat xx.
This is good news; now you must keep taking the meds until you are much stronger. It may take longer than you think so do not come off because you feel better; that is a difficult point as you are not as strong as you may feel.
Hi Olwen,
Yes I have been let down by some 'friends' during this period of illness, I also chose not to bother with these people anyomore, I would rather have my few good friends who have been there for me than remain friends with a bunch of people who won't be there when I really need them. I hope your counselling goes well for you, it's a shame that antidepressants aren't working for you.
Hi Pat,
Ah I don't wish you to feel sorry, I do feel on the whole quite well now. I have been referred for counselling but I am still waiting to be seen. I was offered a group CBT session, but I didn't feel comfortable about going to a group thing so have gone on the waiting list for one to one counselling. I hope it goes ok for you on thursday!
Thankyou Jaguar, yes I understand the need to continue treatment with antidepressants for a few months even after you begin to feel well. I haven't any previous experience of antidepressants but I will do everything as recommended to reduce the risk of depression returning!
Hi sunset
Delighted to hear that on the whole you are feeling quite well (wish I could say the same) I just feel I am wishing my life away and I can't afford to do that at my age! LOL. I always feel great after about 6.oo pm so I guess I am lucky that at least I can look forward to the evenings. Keep in touch.
Love Pat xx
Hi Pat,
Sorry to hear that you still aren't feeling great yet, I hope things start working for you soon.