Differing perspectives

Mental health
1

When people see a lamb frolicking in a field, they see something cute and lovely.  I see what is in store for him....the terror of being taken away from his mother and smelling the blood, hearing the cries of the other lambs in the slaughterhouse, sensing what is going to happen to him.

I go for a walk in our beautiful English countryside and all I see is pain and suffering.

I have had CBT, I am taking Venlafaxine, but nothing makes me see the world through rose tinted glasses.  I see the beauty, of course I do, but it does not mask what is generally hidden from us.  The cruelty and suffering....not only of animals, but humans in various parts of the world.

CBT must be a saviour for a lot of people, but to me it just said "If you see something that hurts you, think of something else that makes you happy"...and that's great, but the ugliness doesn't go away because you aren't thinking about it.

Sorry, I didn't mean to bring everyone down to my miserable level !!!  I just wondered if someone had something to say on the subject.

Love to you all,

Pat.

2

Hi Patricia,

I feel exactly the same as you do about animals which is why I stopped eating meat 45 years ago at the age of 16.   I have not touched it since. 

Bev x

3

Same here Bev.

4

i kind of know what you mean i always see the bad before the good its just how i look at things CBT isnt doing much for me either glad some people c get through it and it works for them but for me think i just see things how they are not what someone tells me they could be if that makes any sence at all 

5

Ha ha good.  I hate the hyprocacy of people who say when travelling 'Oh look at those cute lambs'  and admire them.  Then they go home to eat lamb with mint sauce.  

What I hate most is those who treat vegetarinism as some exotic foreign diet and when they find out they say 'What do you eat then?  Lettuce'? and give a little laugh.  Grrrh!   Or those who find it really funnny and laugh.  Grrrh  again.  Bev x

Bev x

 

6

Dear Pat;

I really love the way you described what it is that you see while in this world.

What is shows me about you is your immense quality to have compassion with life itself , not only about humans but for everything that is created and has breath that walks the earth.

Your love for nature and aminals is an extraudinary gift and shows you in a true light

I feel so much the same about animals , having grown up on what my parents called a "hobby farm" just outside of melbourne , Australia.

I had so much to love when it came to my 10 hens and the cockerall who ruled the roost, I hated those mornings when the fox had broken in and killed my babies.

I had a murray grey pet cow called Murray.

he was so affectionate to me and i would have his huge tongue all over my face , his way of saying I love you .

Then there was Muffins my liittle 3 day old lamb I brough at a market auction and took home with me , Muffins cost me $1  beck then, she required bottle feeding 6 times a day and slept in my bed with me every night for the first 6 months of her life.

I would wake up some morning to be covered in sheep poo ,lol but i didnt care Muffins was my baby.

She went on to have a black n white twin.

I grew up with a collie dog named katie and a barn cat that came with the 12 acre farm when we moved there, then I had 2 horses .

There is something so good about the link we can have with animals and nature.

And you are right it is a cruel , cold world out there when it comes to survial of the human race and the animal world.

We humans really need animals more than they need us .

Some of the most beautiful times in my life are those times that I am with nature and its creatures.

They are so much better than we can ever attain to be.

I wish I could be like Noah and take them all under my wing and keep them safe from all harm.

But sadly we have to live in the real world.

My Father left us at my tender age of 16, we could not keep the farm and the day I saw all my pets taken away from me was devestating and still sticks close in my mind.

What wnet on to happen to Murray , and my chockens , and Muffins and the horses .

They all just were taken away in the back of a truck.

I never saw them again.

The only answer for me in all this is in understanding that reality is harsh and hard to deal with and its a learning process to know how to ever deal with cruelity to anything or anyone.

I applaude you in a funny way for taking on the same burden I feel .

I cannot imagine what an amimal goes through during those last moments.

All I know is they are known to cry sometimes.

I must not dwell on this as i too will begin to cry

Stay with your compassion , understand we cannot change the world all we can do is change ourselves and chose to show others how life can be som much more meaningful when we are willing to understand the impact we all have in sharing this world together as one.

Hugs

PJ

 

7

Well, I know that my cat Jack needs me, and needs cuddles off his mum. He even makes a noise which sounds just like he is saying mummy when he wants me - I'm not kidding. I'm going through a dark time, having recenly being admitted to a psychiatric ward twice after overdoses, and then realizing pretty quickly I wanted to get out. Luckily, I hadnt been sectioned. Then when I get out after a week or so I feel desperate and cant cope anymore.  

Just about getting by at present. I need an operation as I have eye lid lag due to a thyroid condition, and I just simply wont go out or have anyone else in the house apart a member of my psychiatric team. I am also recovering from a whiplash injury and am addicted to diazepam - my doctors say now isnt the right time to get off them unless I am generally less stressed. 

Stuck inside all the times with a very untalkative husband and 18 year old son who has his own interests in life, I feel very very lonely most of the time. Hence my close attachment to my lovely Jack.   I long for the day when I have the confidence to go out and face the world again.

8

Hey Pat

To live is to die. (No, not the Mettalica song). And it's possibly that you're struggling with...the concept of consequence.

CBT is not designed to make you see 'through rose-tinted glasses', but to encourage you to choose a different view. But, you have to weight it up:

To say life is all beauty would be incorrect, as in saying the same about death. Instead, look further - see the dignity and sanctity of both, because with one, we cannot escape the other.

Suffering is another matter. Using your lamb analogy, let's say I see a lamb. I'm not gonna dwell in it's slaughter - might be one that goes on to be used for breeding for all I know!

But I think your angst is more general and deep-seated; it's about all life and suffering - please correct me if I'm wrong!

If that's the case, sure - we all suffer. It's not personal, it's just what it is. As I age, I sometimes wonder at those millions of young soldiers over the wars that have died young; in some ways they have escaped a life of suffering (not all will get what I'm saying and I'm sure a few will be outraged), but there's some nobility in going out before life has hammered them into a pulp, or they've drunk themselves to death (other consequences of PTSD). Yet, some of the survivors rise above it - a renewed by their experiances.

With all I've said above, I guess I'm driving at one conclusion; we chose how we view life - examples like 'rose-tinted' or 'negatively-skewed' are just that - extremes. Best to aim for what you see - rejoice in the beauty of what's around you at that moment. Doesn't mean 'don't think about what will happen', it just means life is precious and moments of embracing joy and savouring little miracles are okay! Don't waste what's good, lovely, miraculous and wonderful in life by spending the time (and effort) in looking towards its end.

Hope this helps....

9

I know what you mean about the silly comments and questions, Bev, I've had them all.  It always seems to me that when people hear that I am vegetarian, they feel as though I am criticising them and they get all defensive.  But it's not the case, I don't mind what they eat, it is their choice, just don't try to make me look like a freak!!

Anyway, I guess we are getting away from the main subject of the discussion, so I will leave it at that.......but it is very nice to find a like-minded friend .

Thank you Bev.

Patxxx

10

Thank you for your lovely reply PJ, it meant so much to me.

I felt so sad to read about the animals you have loved and lost.

I also wish I could be like Noah, I feel so useless, I can do so little to help all the innocents in the world.  I do what I can, but it could never be enough.

Thank you again for telling me your story, for sharing that with me, I feel honoured.

Take care,

Patxxxx

11

Yes, thank you very much, it does help.

I try very hard to savour the beauty and the little miracles....and I am successful a lot of the time.

I guess it's the depression which takes over at times....

I understand and take on board all that you have said.  Your words do help me, I know that you are right. 

I appreciate your help more than words can say.

Patxxx

12

Paryswife

I loved your esponse It eeven made sense to me .

And it was written with profound thought and insight .

This is not just a forum hospital for the sick its a college for the brave and we should never stop learning about each other

Life is as it is.

Its up to us how we see it .

But if anyoone is a bit like me , when anxiety turns me inwards nothing seems to fit.

Thank God for the wisdome we ccan find in each other.

I love this room and I love everyone in here too

Hugs

PJ

WE ARE A SPECIAL LOT ..lol

13

It makes perfect sense to me.

That is exactly how I feel, Steve.

I actually thought that I would benefit from CBT, but it just didn't work for me....I wish it would have.  Perhaps it was my fault, I don't know.....I just remember feeling glad when I didn't have to go any more.

I hope you find your answers, keep trying.

Pat xxx

14

Hugs all the way back to you to patricia.

Your a remarkable lady.

PJ