Im 27 yo male. Contracted type 1 and 2 5 years ago. It has slowly broken me down mentally. Since then i havent had a relationship nor will i give anyone a chance. Ive gone from something i loved to do to be almost put off it. Im trying to keep from spreading it so have had no phsical contact with anyone for nearly a year. Sounds silly but protected sex just kills the mood for me. I havent told anyone and also dont want to my town is small. Id like to date again but I feel lost and dont know what to do.
To make you feel better about this situation, 1 in every 3 people have either type 1 type 2 or both. It's more common then you'd think. There are forums like this that are here to offer people like you and I support because society has made it seem like herpes is a death wish and makes you gross. It's so not true, I have read a lot about the virus as I'm a 23 year old women who has genital HSV1 and it was such a hard thing for me to cope with I nearly made myself go crazy. I think you should do your own research about it and also there are HSV dating sights with people on it who you wouldn't even believe could have it too. I think it'd make you feel better to learn some positive things about it. P
Hi. I'm a 32y/o female. I have hsv1 genitals. I got it 13 months ago from letting a guy go down on me. I know probably too much info but just letting you know the back story. After I was diagnosed I wanted to kill myself. It was like the worst thing ever. I still struggle with the fact that I have it and will for the rest of my life. I haven't had any symptoms or outbreaks since the initial one which I am thankful for. I also live in a small town and no one knows about it except for me. My doctor my ex and the guy I really care about and am hoping that we can make it but not expecting that to work. I was diagnosed 2 weeks before meeting this man that is just about perfect. He's my fairy tale come to life. I understand your struggles with not wanting to give it to anyone. The guy I like doesn't have anything so it is very hard. I didn't think that I could ever have a normal relationship again. I'm still not sure that I can. I spoke with my doctor about this and he said he is more worried about me getting pregnant then passing it on. He went over everything and I was feeling better about it. What holds me back from truley believing it is this man I care about so much. He is really trying but I know it won't and we are both tying so hard. As far as sex goes yes stopping to put on a condom is sort of a mood killer but if I have to do that the rest of my life to be with the one I want so much I will do it. But then like my guy you worry about the condom breaking. I hate to believe that we have to limit ourselves to people that have what we do but maybe that is the case. I think you should date and put yourself out there again. You have to try and get back to being the you before you were diagnosed. It is really hard yes I am still working on that but that's the first step. People may think differently about what I'm about to say but really it's up to you. I personally don't want to just go around and announce it to every person I date or am interested in. I would wait and see inyou truley like that person and can trust that once they find out regardless if they want to continue dating you or not that they won't go out and tell everyone. My ex did that (I didn't get it from him) so to me I'm not telling anyone unless I want things to work and until I know the type of person they are. That is a big deal telling someone and why tell someone that you don't want to be with. Obviously it would be different if you were looking for a hook up but that doesn't sound like why you want. That's where I would start as far as dating goes. Like I said I am still a work in progress also and still trying to figure this whole thing out but just take baby steps and go with your gut feeling. It's not easy dating to begin with but to add the virus on top of it makes it seem almost impossible. I'm sorry if this doesn't help or if I gave you too much useless info but I just wanted to give you details of what I'm going through to give perspective on my advise if that makes any sense.
I'm 20 years old and about a month ago my doctor told me I had herpes, after my first breakout 2 weeks after intercourse with someone I was dating at the time, I've not seen anybody since not even to go out for dinner.. It's hard to deal with, especially so young.. But you're not alone. They say oh it's more common than you'd think, yeah well that doesn't help the situation of knowing you have it, any better. Common or not it's not on anybody's day plan to contract this infection that changes the rest of their lif . It doesn't just change their sex life, it changes they're outlook on themselves and themselves around others. It's easier if you just knowhow to deal with it itself. Hope you get to feeling better!