I thought great, now it's time for me, being a wife and Mother. Three children have all gained University degree's, all have good jobs and are happy. A husband who plays golf up to 4 times a week and happy. Now it's my time. My time to enjoy going shopping, weekends away, friends, etc, etc, ect. Then the menopause hits with a very very big BANG!!
I ache all over. My mood swings are unreal. I am so emotional. Anxiety attacks. Panic attacks. Do not want to meet high maintenance friends. Do not want to enter into conversations, as I do not want to constantly defend and talk about how I feel. I am a Pisces, always been caring, bubbly and friendly. I now do not know who I am most days! Lost myself. Can not make decisions. Not interested in sex. It hurts. Vaginal dryness. My ovaries feel like they are being squeezed and wrung out. Lethargic. Sleep is disruptive. Restless leg syndrome. Indigestion. Getting up to go to the loo.
Is there anyone else who feels like I do?
Yesss... just keep focused on positive things. Keep moving, busy your mind with happy thoughts and daily things you have to do, take vitamins, get lots of rest, hydrate yourself, exercise or yoga, long walks in the park, hanging out with your friends and family are all good things. Some days it's harder to do most of these things, but staying positive, and enjoying life as much as you can is so important. Your symptoms will ease up over time, but know we are all going through it together. You are not alone.
Thank you so much for taking the time and trouble to reply.
It makes me smike to think you have taken valuable time out to reply to me.
I do exercise, 3 times a week, Booaika, Zumba and PT. I took these up before I felt rubbish. As I wanted to kerp my body flexibke so I could still walk around in my 60s/70s and 80s!
My diet is wuite healthy, though, I am over weight, always have been, I can live with that.
Its all the other things I mentioned. My husband of 35 years has no understanding what so ever and thinks I am rejecting him. How do you explain that your sex drive has just got lost?
My children, 30, 27 and 25 are all trying to help me, in fact told me to join a forum. I am 58 and like I said just started to enjoy freedom and had money to soend on me, but has just had a big slap not only in the face but all over! I feel like 's**t' most days.
I do not want to go on HRT!! Do not take any meds and dont want to. Am I being stupid?
Thanks so much for listening x
Sorry fat fingers and loads of spelling mistakes!!! 🙄
Hey yeah I can relate to all of that and more... try to keep busy and do things for you... when I’m at work I want to be home when I’m home I want to be somewhere else I cannot make my mind up about anything , my brain is foggy my tummy bloated palpertations anxiety emotional about anything and everything , your definatly not alone with how your feeling , I feel like my body has been overtaken by the perimenopause and I’m not liking who and how I’m feeling , I find sitting thinking makes it so much worse ... hang in there Hun and remember your not alone 💕
Hi there
Rrrrr bless you, I'm the same, use to be out with friends and what ever, then hit 50 wham the menopause kicks in, worse nitemare ever, hot sweets, depression hit bad, and going to bed was a nitemares as couldn't sleep, and was very irratable, kicking legs around as tho I'm fighting with the bed lol, I live alone which is good job as I think I would of killed some one if they were in the same bed as me😡
It's been 3 years now and things are slowing down a little, but that maybe because Iv been put on high does of antidepressants which mite of help a little...
I still don't want to go out the house to meet friends, but in time hoping I will get back to being me again..
I can't have HRT due to blood clots on my lungs a few years ago, but maybe talking to your doctor may help, and see if there's any thing for you, don't sit and suffer in silence if there is a chance for you to feel soon what better about your self ..
I agree there's a lot of us out there all the same, fighting the menopause, and the one thing to hold on to is that there will be a end to this alfull menopause...
When, who knows, as we are all different woman, but u will ...
I wish u all the best, and a big hug to you, take care 🙂 X
Thanks so much for replying 👍🏽
Ditto to what you said. I am at work now, fighting back tears, emotional wrek!! It seems I have been taken over, my mouth comes out witg what I am thinking, not always suttle!! Not like me at all!!!
You take care too and thanks for your care x
What a loveky lady you are to taj time out to reply to me. Never thought that I would get any repsonces. I am not a convident person.
I can relate to all what you said. There has been times that I have moved beds to get away from my husband, cuz as quite a placid person normally, I did feel I could have stabbed him just for disturbing what little sleep I was getting with his snorning!! Sleep to me was so easy before the menopause, so sleep deprived now, its horrid.
I did go to GP, but with only a 10 minute appointment, I felt under pressure just to get how I was feeling into that time!!! So, have an utrasound appointment tomorrow, to check my pelvic area!! HRT, I have read so many different reports, which are confusing to say the least, especially when I cant make decisions!!!
You take care and thank you so much for taking the time out to replt 😘 I know it can take years!! I just want me back ☹️
I’m 45 and last year I was like 25 and super fit and feeling like a superhero!!! Then all of sudden I was hit with rashes, eye swelling, crazy tight muscles(to the point I have tendonitis in my foot and elbow now!!)
Feel exhausted trying to find cures which increases stress and now I have crazy chest tightness.
I feel like I live at doctors insteD of the gym.
It blows!!
I’m going to look into HRT.. it’s worth paying to balance this nightmare out.
I can’t take pills bc I’m allergic to the fillers.
I get what you mean tho I feel like I’m becoming withdrawn and trying to stay positive isn’t always easy.
But I’m trying to keep my mind strong with light exercise and music to keep my soul happy.
Baby steps
It's the cruelest joke of life, isn't it? I remember those years where I thought, "Oh good, when the kids are gone I'll have all the time in the world to do this stuff." Yeah right. No one told me I wouldn't want to do any of those things, my sex life would be in the dumpster, vaginal atrophy would set in, and I'd feel like garbage and have muscle pain all over.
I'm sorry you are also going through all this. I really thought I had sailed through because I really didn't have hot flashes and night sweats. But many of us have these less obvious, under reported, symptoms.
Hi Sjane yeah I do completely have a husband and two teenage boys thought exactly like you but then perimeno struck I also don't no who I am anymore have every symptom goin aches everyday fatigue feeling bloated dry eyes not interested in doing anything it is so exhausting you are not alone Hun sending 🤗
I also had to go for an ultrasound and transvaginal examination so know exactly where you are coming from I could murder my husband most days 😩😩
Thanks for posting.. I feel like this most of the time.. just lost!! I used to be the rock-- able to do it all. Now, I feel like 'a wasted person' who can't make decisions or even function. I should be out in the yard, doing house projects, shopping and just having fun like most woman. But for some reason I don't feel like it. Whenever there is free time I'm tired or just spaced out. I'm sure my husband appreciates it cuz our credit card bill is lower.. ha ha
Hi SJane!
You are definitely not alone and you came to the right place! I found this group a few weeks ago looking for answers. It's been a life saver! Finally people who understand! I had a hysto 16 yrs ago and am post meno according to my doc, but I now have atrophy and symptoms I never had I'm having now. I had almost convinced myself I had some horrible disease until I found this site! I have suffered panic and anxiety for over 20 yrs and it's worse now. But I take medication for it, plus I have heart and blood pressure issues and have to take meds for those too. I hate it. Last week I added Estrace Cream to my list of things I do not want to take! Not to get too personal or give too much info, but I'm rather surprised with the Estrace Cream, it has, in only a week rekindled my interest in sex. I have atrophy and in July my world came crashing down, aside from the crazy symptoms, dizziness, moodiness, never enough sleep, heart palpitations etc, I'm happy that my interest in the bedroom activities has made a come back! It's not like in my 20s but at this point I'm happy. Vaginal hormones won't deal with your other issues but it's something to talk to your doc about and depending on what you and your doc decide on maybe that'll get that area sorted out. I use 1 gram of Estrace Cream at night, for 2 weeks then I'll be cutting back to 2x a week, but when I go in a month for my recheck I'm going to see if I can switch to Vagifem instead bc it's just a tiny pill you insert and no mess.
Hang in there! I'm told it gets better..
You sound like such a sweet, sweet lady, and I hope all goes well with your ultrasound, I know I think you said not keen on taking tablets, but if I'm right u live in England ??? Yeah?? Going by the doc ten min appointment lol, yeah they don't seem to have enough time with you, it's as tho they want u in and out, so not to make them late for others...
Iv tried ' kalms' tablet as they are herbal from Heath store or most places sell them, and they are to help take the edge of the menopause, and anxiety, they do have a good review from other woman taking them, you can buy of the Internet as well, just thought I'd tell you about these, incase u feel in the end that you need to try some thing, and with them being herbal they may not be as frightening for you to take..
I wish you , all the best in the world, and keep talking to others and on these forums like this, to give you some courage your not alone in going through this, I'm here for you if you need to rant and rave, I will always lend a ear, on here or you can always email me personally ...
You take care u wonderful lady 😁 X
Thank you for taking the time to reply to my post.
My daughter, 27, encouraged me to join a forum. It's was just by chance this was the top of the list on Google.
I have had a few responses and all are very supportive, helpful and friendly, just like yours 😊
At my Dr appointment I did ask for help with vaginal dryness, am
nd had researched the pill that is inserted. So, yes, I do have a prescription for the tablet, just have not used it yet. Do you know if it has any side effects?
I like you thought my whole world was falling apart, read into my symptoms and came up with all sorts of dark things....thought I was going to have a heart attack!! Palpitations are terrible and makes me feel very anxious which then has a knock on effect, like a vicious circle!!
Thank you again for your lovely response 😊
Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to my post. 😊
I am really unsure about taking HRT....I have read so many reports about it. One being that it only delays the symptoms and when you stop taking them the symptoms come back!
I have started Zumba, Booiaka and have PT and like you enjoy dancing, even tho I am 58! I to go to gigs Clean Bandid, Craig David, Two Door Cinema Club, Rudimental, etc, etc, so am keeping young in that way, but feel so ancient in other ways due to these disabilitaing symtoms! x
Thank you for the 'hug" sending you one back 🤗
Thank you for responding to my post......not great is it the way we feel, especially as I was really looking forward to being just a little bit selfish and spending time on me, after many years looking after and out for my husband and children.
Now, do not have the 'get up and go' to do that!
I do try to keep up with Zumba and Booiaka classes and have PT once a week, but, gosh it's a struggle some weeks!
x
thank you for your response..x
My husband too is very happy that I no longer want to go out shopping spending!! ha ha
I always did think life was the wrong way round, when you are young and need money and got energy to go out and spend it, you have no spare cash! Then when you are getting older and have money to spend have no energy or inclination to go out and spend it! 🙄
Oh wow, what a lovely responce 😊
People used to think I was a lovely lady 😃, but, not so sure they think that anymore. I have been keeping my distance from a few of my friends recently. I really can not cope with 'high' maintainance friendships! I have found that some friendships have not helped me one bit with how I am feeling. Very disappointing to be perfectly honest! Especially, as I have always been 'there' for them through their tough times (not menopause).
You take care and yes, I am here for you too. You can email me xx