Everybody says "You shouldnt look on the internet" about symptons you have or procedures you are going to have.
The reason they say this is because most people are stupid , cant put things into perspective and have the tendancy to exaggerate.
So you need an endoscopy? You must be in extreme pain then? I was telling my stupid doctor for 4 years that I either had an ulcer or stomach cancer and that I wanted an endoscopy or barium meal, she just laughed. Oh well she knew best, until I was hospitalised.
So make sure you need an endoscopy, dont just seek it unless like me youve spent 4 years rolling on the floor for an hour 5 times a day in intense agony that the GP doesnt give you pain relief for.
Ok, you are definitely having an endoscopy now. Thats it, you are in. You are having it done , you will survive and this will help.
Dont bother asking them any questions. The questions you want to ask, they will avoid and distract you. Everything happens very quickly.
Throat spray or sedation?
I had throat spray.
Survival guidline.
Consent form. You might as well tick "take all my dna and body tissue" -I ticked the box which stated "I do not want my samples to stored" - thought that was pretty clear yet she questioned me on it and in short of getting into a political argument about my property I just asked her "why bother with the consent form if youre just going to get pateints to change their tick boxes? I read and understood everything, which part are you having a problem with?"
Tell the nurses you want to make their job as easy as possible for them and if there is anything you can do to help. Its nice, it will put them at ease and they might give you a few extra pumps of Lidocaine like they did me. Tastes like banana. Nice.
All of a sudden your throat feels like its constricted, exactly like you have a golf ball stuck in your throat. DONT PANIC. You can breath. Your throat is numb and your brain has stopped receiving signals tricking your body into thinking you cant breathe. Breathe. Its normal.
On a bed, lying down on your side. Forefinger in a pulse reader.
Little green mouth piece with air hole - bite down ( youll notice in endoscopy pamphlets there is a warning about maybe losing crowns and fillings but it doesnt tell you how this might happen- given that I was biting down on this thing for my life I would say that whatever is about to happen to you for the next 10 minutes and you find yourself biting down just REMEMBER your teeth- your mouth is numb you could smash your teeth out with a hammer and you wouldnt feel it!
Ok , here we go . Its just a little wire with a tiny camera on the end. Going to have a good look. No. Its not a tiny wire with a camera on the end. It should be a tiny wire with a camera on the end. Its 2013, we're into nano technology and space exploration. Its a pipe. So stop thinking kettle flex and start thinking hose pipe.
I goes in, you do not feel a thing. No pain. But this is not a painful procedure anyway.
They fill your stomach with air - didnt even feel it. No pain or unusal feeling.
This lasts for 10 minutes while they look around and take photos.
How you deal with these 10 minutes is up to you. I was convulsing and choking for most of the time but kept brave. The nurse kept telling me to breath but since I had a pipe down my thoat I found it a little difficult. I was calm and constantly giving them the thumbs up as I they seemed to freak out as I was choking and fighting for breath while at the same time trying to lie as still as possible. (stomach tearing is a rare complication , and this is probably when it happens so I was aware of this incase I survived) You do feel like you are dying and you could believe that the nurses are not aware that you are dying but you have to trust that they know what they are doing. But you do really feel like you are going to die from lack of oxygen. Its like drowning. Thats not an exaggeration, it is like drowning and knowing you are going to die.
Now it turned out I had an ulcer and a hiatus hernia and the reason I was gagging and choking all the way through the latter part of the procedure was because of the hernia so it may not be as bad for you. However, I look at it like this. Youve got a hose pipe all the way down your throat.
I'd have sedation next time. The reason being is that that is the option that the nurses try to steer you away from. Knowing what I know about doctors and nurses is that they want to make it easier for themselves during procedure. If you have sedation , they have to do a little bit more work, they have to monitor this and that and it takes longer and you're more of a dead weight to them. Im assuming sedation means you are completely out of it.I had loads of marijuana in the morning which took the edge off the horror. Also reading people experiences on other website leaves me feeling a little cheated. " Oh its nothing, you lie down, they put you under and you wake up ands its all done"....excuse me? As far as Im concerned, if youve been asleep the whole time at some magical surgery then your opinion is somewhat limited.
Im pretty tough. I know pain. This is something else. Probably on a par with being waterboarded with no secrets left to tell. For those ten minutes just think of yourself as an empty vessell that needs examining and it will be over. The worse outcome is going through all this only to find nothing there. So make sure you definitly need an endoscopy, i.e. you have constant agonising pain.
Remember, its a hosepipe. Not a wire.