I'm writing this now to share my struggles and to seek advice or help from others who may have had similar experiences. As I'm writing this now I'm 17 years old (male) and I want to start from the beginning.
My struggle with anxiety and health started when I was 11 after suffering a full blown panic attack from a close call with carbon monoxide poisoning. For the next year or so I experienced severe health anxiety and panic attacks. I would get myself into the cycle of researching disorders and diseases and thinking that I had them, despite having no real reason to worry. I even visited a therapist with my parents once, but I found it uncomfortable and unhelpful so we did not go again. As I grew older and matured, I began feeling normal and even to this day I do not believe I have suffered a full blown panic attack since those times.
For a year or so everything was normal, school was great, and I had little to no anxiety and definitely no panic attacks or symptoms. Fast forward to the summer (age 14 now)— I was out of town and in a hotel the night before my cousin’s wedding. That morning I woke up feeling very strange and past anxieties began to come back. It was so sudden- I was feeling normal; great, even, and these symptoms came out of nowhere. I woke up and was extremely lightheaded, to the point where I felt like I was going to pass out. To this day, this feeling of lightheadedness, although not always as severe, has persisted to the point where I don’t really even remember what feeling normal is like. Visits to the doctors began- emergency room at first, then my pediatrician, inner ear specialists and finally the cardiologist. I had an echo and an ECG, both of which came up completely normal. I was diagnosed with POTS, although I was not convinced as I’m dizzy all the time, even when lying down and I do not have the sharp spike in heart rate upon standing that is typical of POTS.
For the next year my health anxiety was back, although now without the panic attacks. The worry this time around was on my heart. I would get palpitations (feelings of a skipped heart beat) and this new and scary feeling, along with my lightheadedness, would send me to the internet researching heart conditions. When more severe symptoms began, such as waking up in the middle of the night with episodes of tachycardia and passing out/near passing out when waking up, we saw doctors again. Tests were done, and the cardiologist was not worried and still associated this with POTS and anxiety.
After a year of this (now almost 16) my mom read something about sleep apnea and its ability to cause fatigue, lightheadedness, and palpitations in the night. I got a sleep study and to our surprise it turned out I did have moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, at the age of 16 without any of the normal causes such as obesity (I’m pretty thin), old age, and abnormal mouth/throat structure. During the sleep study they did detect a heart anomaly and this furthered my anxiety. I was given a CPAP machine and I desperately hoped this would resolve my symptoms, but it did not. It did help, though, as my fatigue was gone and my school performance increased from decent to good. I did, though, still struggle with lightheadedness and heart palpitations.
Fast forward a half a year or so, and I am experiencing worsening heart episodes and still the lightheadedness. I visited the cardiologist again and got an ECG where they found me to have inverted t waves in all leads (V1-6). The doctor seemed worried and immediately ordered multiple tests, such as an echo, stress test, and cardiac MRI. The echo and MRI showed the same thing- a very normal structure but slightly enlarged, about 1 extra centimeter than normal, left ventricle, which he said should not be causing any symptoms. The stress test showed multiple PVCs, so he ordered an event monitor which I wore for a few weeks. In the end it showed nothing severe but it did show that I was having hundreds of PVCs every day. The doctor explained it to me that the inverted t waves do not signify something seriously wrong at the moment, however it does indicate something could develop in the future and my heart should be tested annually.
This was about 2 months ago, and my heart has been gradually bothering me more and more. My anxiety is getting worse and now I feel like it’s interfering with my life again like it use to way back. The rational me says nothing is wrong and I’m just experiencing symptoms of anxiety, but there’s a part of me worried that something is seriously wrong. I don’t want to go back to the doctors, though, as I feel like my parents have spent enough time and money dealing with what is probably just anxiety, although spending another 10 months to my next exam feeling the way I am now seems unbearable.
This is where I’m asking for advice. Do I go back to the doctor? Is there medication for anxiety that I should try first? Should I try seeing a therapist again? and has anyone else had a similar experience, and what worked for you? If you read this whole post I sincerely thank you as I know it was drawn out and poorly written. I just needed to vent and honestly it has made me feel a little better. I really want my life to be straightened out before going off to college and I appreciate any input somebody has to offer