This is the worst symptom of peri for me. I can be in my office at work with ten other people and feel alone and scared, visit my family and feel like I'm the only person in the house, etc. When other symptoms are bad or I've got another doctor visit coming up or am worried about a new symptom, it feels like there is nobody else on this planet. My mom went through a few years during her peri when she could not be by herself and now I'm like that, too. It is just horrible and isolating. It makes me think that everyone else's life is easier because they don't have these problems. But I know they have problems of their own... just can't see past the peri sometimes.
I feel the same way as if I just wrote this post myself! In fact I so hope other woman write on here about their feelings of loneliness and being alone. I don't read a lot about this and feel very isolated , it's absolutely depressing, I have felt ok for the past 5 days after feeling just dreadful for about 6 straight weeks that I thought was never going to end with anxiety and all the other symptoms that go along with it. I was actually out and about and cleaned my house and mopped my floors and when all done bent over to wash off feet in bathtub and pulled my back out, so now woke up today feeling like I want to cry and go through this awful lonely anxiety for who knows how long this time. When I get like this I can't even leave my house I don't dare because if I stray too far I'm out a few miles away and feel I can't get home because the anxiety kicks in! Then when I get home the doom and gloom crying all the time my life is over I have nobody to turn to I feel so all alone takes over ughh#!! What a horrible vicious cycle these peri symptoms are... Your not alone in sure feeling it and wish this would just all go away!!!
Also forgot to mention that I think a lot of this for me comes from the fact that NO we don't feel like we can or want to be alone for whatever scared reasons we have, but that I don't have a choice, I feel like I don't have anyone that can honestly be here for me and that sucks! ( very lonely time) kids are grown and gone, parents are elderly now and need me, and hubby so over hearing me say I don't feel good can you just stay with me for 20 minutes before you have to go. I look around and here I am alone in my house with all the dreadful symptoms HORRID..
I feel the same. Kids grown, dog died, husband works long hours and is often abroad. I quit my job a few years ago as I hated it ( taught high school for 25 years). I'm now a student again but part time. I hate being alone all day, wake up alone. A year ago it didn't bother me. It's just horrible.
Oh Lana bless you! Yes both my beloved dogs just died too one in April and the other in May a few weeks later. I cried for days! Hubby works long hours too. Not that he would want to be home with me anyways I think I'm giving him anxiety as he was just diagnosed 1 year ago with Afib and that makes none of this any easier! But as I said he's so over me saying how bad I feel, I think they think we can just snap right out of this and that's just not the case! I work from home when I can, (small online business/hobby) but haven't been able to keep up with it right now as I need to be able to go out shipping for my inventory and just can't.. Do glad Liz started this post hope many more woman reply. Take care ❤
Suppose to say shopping not shipping, and so not do ooppps
Yup. I get you. And I feel so guilty about being in this lousy state. I should feel so blessed and grateful for what I have. I am but it is just like the spice of life is like a flickering candle threatening to go dark. I can't get myself to do research I need to do. I look for housekeeping jobs to do around the house! Crazy. Hope it passes soon. So sorry about your dogs so sad.
What is your business/ hobby?
The guilt is the worst for sure, especially when it comes to my grandkids that I haven't been able to spend much time with lately since all this crap started. And I have a brand new grandchild that's 2 months today and don't even really know him like my other 2 it's just so heart breaking , especially since it would be me watching them all the time if I didn't feel so bad with peri/meno. But what can we do... EBay/internet sales is my work/ hobby, it use to and one day again keep me super busy. Along with my other hobbies which keep me busy like shopping for old broken furniture and making them shabby chic again!
Hi Liz
and Lana and Gypsy.
I feel very thankful for this website. Even though for the most part I despise what technology as done to us, its experiences like these, being able to reach out to other women around the world who feel and are living through this same thing.
I too relate to the loneliness and isolation. No one gets what you are going through and its as if you are in a bubble. This hormonal shift i my life though has brought on depression and anxiety.
I do know that when you are around people but don't feel engaged, and just 'there', its a classic sign of depression.
I don't have a spouse or significant other so it is just my kids and I. It is heartbreaking when you don't have it in you to engage and be with them. I just force myself to anyways, and they know i'm faking it, and that hurts all the more.
Just wanted to chime in that im there, and im with you guys, and I get it.
xx
I just wanted to chime in that it really is awful to be going through this
Lana, Gypsy, and Kauaiblue, I'm glad you're here. It does feel like being in a bubble. I am single without children but have a sister, nephews and parents who are in their 70s. I work in a tech office with a lot of young men in 20s and 30s so obviously have nothing in common. Fell into job years ago and many attempts to find something else have failed. I relate to your words about family and feel that I wear out mine with all my problems. Have wondered if I am depressed for a long time.
How old are you Liz?
Im 53 now, and lovin life!! 
I have one friend, dear friend who lives in houston Tx. She was the one who clued me in on what was going on months back. Shes 54.
What is scary is that this shift that we are in doesn't get better necessarily right away. Some women are lucky and are done with it in a year or two. Then there are others that just deal with it year after year.
This is what scares me the most, and that is why i am beginning to do my research to figure out anything I can do to find relief and peace.
You sound very much like me. I watched my grandson like a full time nanny to a few years. I have another on the way. I haven't spent much time with my grandson for a few weeks and it is awful. I miss him and it is just so hard to explain. Hugs and hope we can be positive thinkers and get out of this. Xx
Dear Liz - please just hang in there. There are alot of ladies going through this and you are not alone. Part of peri symptoms in some woman, like myself, is having to cope with anxiety. The anxiety lingers into what they refer to as General Anxiety Disorder - one of which order can lead to monophobia,isolaphobia or autophobia. I think these are the names refering to this symptoms. In short - fear of being alone. My fiance had to take a days leave recently when I was booked of sich and had to stay home alone. I almost though like I was going to loose my mind. We went away for a weekend and had to come home the next day as the fear of being away from my home also triggered my anxiety. Luckily - these are treatable with CBT (Therapy). A therapist will help you to cope with your fear and teach you techniques to overcome this. Some will suggest taking calming pills for a period of 4 months to get over the worst. All of this is caused by the hormonal imbalance in your body and once you learn how to deal with the fear and your body slowly adjust to these hormonal changes it will get better. Also use calcium, magnesium, vit B and D.
Hi ladies. It is very comforting to know I am not alone in all of this mess. You guys have given perfect descriptions of how I feel most of the time. This forum has truly been a life saver. However when I am feeling so much anxiety and doom and gloom like I'm dying I just wish my life was over. I know, that sounds terrible, but it is so bad I just don't want to take the worrying anymore. And then of course I feel guilty, because I know I am blessed in so many ways. My health anxiety also spills over onto my kids and my husband. I worry myself sick about them having something terrible wrong too. As if worrying about myself wasn't bad enough. And yes my husband gets tired of it. I was glad to hear someone else also asks their husband to just stay with them for a few minutes before they leave. Since all of this started, I have had weeks where I feel better, but when it comes back it's almost unbearable and just want to get back to feeling normal again. I pray this ends soon for all of us
Hi. Well your not alone. I felt like that about a year and half ago. And for the life of me could not figure it out Was such an odd horrible feeling 😔 Now I know it's all hormones due to peri. Went from that to worse. Anxiety crept in and leaves me scared to death on days. I am grateful to God the days I feel good Still treading along this path waiting for periods to cease and praying for balance again and becoming myself It is peri and your not alone by far Keep coming here. The post helped me sooo much. Just knowing your not alone makes it easier It's so hard I know. But try to keep as busy as you can That's what I do. Feel better.
Dear Liz - it is normal to worry about everything once you have fallen into that hole. I have to visit a lot of clients in my profession. Some clients staying as far as an hour and a half's drive. Iv'e done this so many times and now find myself not able to do that anymore. I get panic attacks before leaving, having to deal with them on the highway thinking the worst. Therapy helps a lot as mentioned because they teach you techniques to cope with your fears. Keep a dairy and write down your good days - when having a doom and gloom day, go back and read "your good days", this will re-kindle your brain and overcome your fears of anxiety. Motivate yourself by diverting to your good days and tell yourself in your bad days, this is just hormonal and anxiety. I don't always feel like this, I have good days and the anxiety will pass again. You have to teach your brain how to deal with anxiety and the only way to do so, is to stay motivated and tell your brain, anxiety you "b***h" I have good days and you will not take over my life. I am going to fight you and will have a good day. I know this might sound stupid, but this is what therapy teaches you. I am so scared of the dark, and the other day I pushed myself to the limits. I went into a dark room, waiting for the anxiety to kick in, and then practiced my techniques to overcome the fear, and you know, I actually did. It takes time, but the brain is a very powerful organ, and you have the ability to re-kindle it. Also, look forward to the time every nasty symptom will pass. You will have no more responsibilities, you will be able to have zest in your life again. I am telling myself, yeah, this is a s****y road but one of these days I will have time to go to the gym again, only cook when I feel like it, taking up my painting and crochet again, do what I want when I want and only if I feel. he therapist mentioned that having anxiety and thinking about it and being scared of when it will strike again, causes more anxiety and that anxiety leads to more anxiety. Accept it, don't fight a panic attach, when having one, sit it out and whilst having it, talk to your brain, and tell your brain - you are not dying, its just a panic attach and it will pass. This way you learn how to be less scared off it and you are still in control.
I do trust that my post is not stupid, and will make sense in some way.
excellent post. I am out of peri, have nt had my period for two years now. I am only now, getting this awful anxiety. It is mild but there. It began with health issues I kept having. Mine and my adult kids and it became health anxiety and then general anxiety. My husband is abroad too often from work and once while he was away, I had post meno bleeding and read all about it and freaked out. I think this is what developed into the health anxiety and then general anxiety and uncomfortableness being alone. I am controlling it, with a low dose once a day of zanax xr .5, mindfullness and hypnotherapy through you tube and hopefully will start cognitive behavioral therapy soon. I am hoping to get off the xanax. Before the xanax,I must say, that when I felt awful, I would have a glass of wine and then sometimes another one or two. Sometimes I would have a vodka and tonic... It became almost daily 1-3 drinks. I am totally off alcohol now, off caffeine as well. I used to be so busy, so strong, juggling work and 4 kids and running a home. I just dont know what happened to me. So it is good to know I am not the only one.
I'm 46 and started having peri symptoms about 3 years ago. I've also tried a lot of different things to feel better and get healthier. Still trying!
I hope that your friend in Houston is safe following the recent hurricane and floods. So much devastation there.