Woke up this morning and i have no idea why i feel so empty and numb today, cried for no reason for at least half an hour this morning!
Feel like an idiot with my emotions running away with me.
Why do i feel so numb and alone right now?
I have no answer for you Dawn, as I'm going through similar as you will know. It can be a slight comfort to know that you are not alone.
Tomorrow is another (and hopefully better) day
Take care
Rodders
Sorry you're feeling so low. Are you seeing a gp, therapist or psychiatrist at all or taking meds? Any changes in meds recently?
Hope you have some support, if not we're here xxx
Hello Dawn
To know your concerns makes you half way there to understand your condition and rectify your depression.
What has caused this emotional roller coaster at this time, ? You sound very lonely
Thanks Rodders, today is not much better but still keep plodding on
Take Care
Dawn
Hi
I am under my gp and taking citalopram 20mg daily, i see my gp next friday as it happens.
I have an amazing friend but sometimes i dont want to burden her with everything as she has her own life too.
I journal most things but i dont know why i am feeling this way right now!
I am on 20mg citalopram and see my gp next week.
Far too much history to list on here, a snapshot of me though would be not the best childhood, school i got bullied so didnt do well there. Mum and dad split i was 16 not a great start there! everything has gone downhill from there. Lost my granny who i was very close to, never got to say goodbye to her before she passed which was my only request but my mum refused to let me do that, hence i am no longer in touch with her! after that too much to list.
I have a good network of close family and friends. My hubby is great and i have a good job which i enjoy.
I just dont know how to stop feeling like this!
On a close family death Parents like to keep their young away from death.
and sometimes this can have negative thoughts supplanted into their brain as far as the child is concerned. The UK is bad handling a death it has become sanitised. Families generally were present at the death and they were allowed to lay out the body and talk to the deseased. in the 19thC and early 20thc. Now of us die in the bland wards of hospital and many people then feel a lack of closure.
You need time to discuss your loss and cry if need be. Also you need to share the experiences you had with the dead and this in the past we possibly done at a Wake. All I can suggest is you need to let out your feelings and explain your loss ofyour Grandma. You should be able to do this with family members or relatives, this is what makes a family grow and come to terms with a loss.I feel this period for you has not been allowed.
Generally a loss of a close relative can take upwards of two years, until you understand the memories you have of the deceased, will comfort you and help you move on
I was not a child i was 22 when she died!
Whilst i understand the grief process i was not given my final wish which i made very clear!
I have cried several times and i dont feel any better for it!
Dawn
Sorry if I have upset you I should not assume. I do not feel I called you a child, just a young person.
I lost many of my family in my twenties and was generally pushed to the back when we lost someone close, it is not very nice as we all need to make our peace and say goodbye to someone who we have loved over the years
that is all i wanted but i got ignored, nothing new there with my family!
Is there any way we can help ?
Death of family is a very hard place to recover from.
I was brutalised at one loss and eventually I would show no feeling, I would look after and visit family members and assist until my relatives died. Generally it was me who stood up in my side of the family and helped them to cope. This happened for a long time and it ended about three years ago. I walked away from my family members and they now do not know where we are. I am sixty six now and I have just gained closure of a very nasty period that controlled my life.
Dawn be kind to yourself, you sound a nice considerate person.
BOB
Thank you Bob,
I am in some way like you, i am the only one who takes my only surviving grandparent shopping every other saturday, all hospital appointments i take her and i dont feel i get the recognition from other family members that i deserve! i am the only one of 8 grandchildren that bother!
Yes you are dawn,eventually I had to disappear from my family as my life was becoming to complicated I could not see any way where I would be able to have a decent retirement without unreasonable demands.and needs You are a very kind person. It is so very important you do not burn out as demands can become to unreasonable. Your family members need to pick up the slack to allow you to have a life
Keep a hold
BOB
I know how you feel dawn, many a day I wake up and feel nothing, completely numb and cry for ages with no real reason. I don't want to get up, go out or do anything or speak to anyone.
I feel like I am not good enough for anyone or anything, if I can't love myself then why should anyone else