Hi Ledgy,
I have had many accidents, injuries, tumors, operations, sicknesses (infections of all kind) in my life since the age of 6yrs (a month in hospital, scars for life on my body), so nothing can really throw me easily and I have a half full glass approach to life, otherwise I would drown.
When docs tell me 'this one does not look benign' I am the one saying 'let's wait and see after histology report'. (sure enough was benign twice)
I have to have a half full glass approach to life,
since I have now to deal with a very, very chronically sick child and that is much harder than being seriously sick and in ICU myself.
Watching helplessly my child in agony, severe pelvic pain, tears, unable to walk at times due to pain, vomiting often until oesophagus tore and bled is harder than anything.
Yes, your mum is right and also because, small problems can be solved by big ones. If one has not experienced much so far (like my dad), every for others 'small' things are huge (where I roll my eyes at when he dramatises a little toe injury or possibility of diabetesII)
Nevertheless those problems, that others would wish to 'only' have, do feel huge for them, like for you at that point of time and this must not be dismissed therefore.
It's important to feel understood and helped, or at least understood and heard.
For my child we also are in psychological treatment (which she hates as it is far to luhdiduh for her) in order to keep sane with all the burden of pain and return quickly to normal life, once burden falls, which we still hope will one day.
There are apps that help meditating
and I highly would recommend such an approach.
We got the mindfulness app for example (in severe pain impossible to listen to, but when in moderate pain)
There must be something for adults, too.
You seem to have your mum around or some 'help' to look after children for a bit of time, who could care for your children for a few hours and children feel comfi with?
Then I would really go in your case and look where there is some relaxation, meditation, time for yourself to destress actively.
(Also search net for gastritis friendly diet trials)
Maybe a one-off psychologist (expensive!) could help gather all the info you need, where to get professional good relaxation help or which apps to listen to in order to not fall for some dogdy things, as we are vulnerable to when being sick or anxious.
I am very happy to hear that your gastritis symptoms have eased a bit.
(just the tablets made a difference?)
That's good.
Gastritis can be a long road and yes, I am impatient too, like quick fix and often it is so not the case, very frustrating.
If symptoms get to a point of being controlable, it's already a win.
Know what our phsychologist said, which made my girl almost angry: if you have severe pain and manage to do a few things (by kind of forcing yourself to e.g. bath, walk, 15min reading, 1 min sitting up straight), it's already a win even pain is the same.
I don't totally agree with that, but I see her point:
You must never ever let pain or anxiety take control of your life.
That was the message.
In order to do so, you need some help, some deep breathing, some small steps that prompt you: I can do that!
You had your scan by now, haven't you. Once you know, that there is nothing big organic to be found, you have time to cure your body.
Also as I like to look at things: if something is found, it can be tackled.
I sometimes scream outside into the garden: bring it on life, what next!?
You have to think of everything you manage to do as an achievement, every improvement as a win.
You can do it! You are here! You are wonderful. You are not crazy.
You experience something the first time, that you are actually vulnerable, that is scary, but that is life.
Please look into something like mindfulness app as a daily basis (daily!) for a few minutes (hard to get with children at times, but maybe at nightime?), take care of yourself actively, your body requests it!
All the best!!