Girlfriend with anxiety came of meds

Mental health
1

Hi

I have another post on this matter so if you want the full picture of what’s going on then you can look at that but basically what’s happening is I have a girlfriend who I’ve been with for 6 months now and the last month and a half have been really hard as her depression and anxiety have become really bad. It first started with her wanting to break up for reasons that didn’t seem big like I was only complimenting her to get approval or I was just using her for sex and that I was going to cheat on her which none of them were try but she thought we needed to break up because of them.

That’s the background now about 2 weeks ago she turned off her phone for a week because of her anxiety so I left her to it then after that week it was the holidays and we started talking again, we met every day for 3-4 hours and she was really happy and things were going good, so she came off her meds 2 days into us talking again, for the next 5 days after that she was very happy we had our 6 mounts anniversary and we were very in love, however the day after our anniversary she had a bit low and thought she wasn’t doing enough work for our exams in 6 weeks, the day after that she says we need to break up for exams and talk after which he really upset me as the way she said it made it look like we wouldn’t see each other ever again and this was a full break up as she was saying things like I might not like her after the break up and that I should just see other people and that she doesn’t want to say we’ll get back together because she doesn’t know how she’ll feel then but said she still really wants to be with me but this is the best thing for her grades.

 2 days pass with no contact and she starts messaging me saying she really needs to tell me things and the things she tells me are not really that important like on of them was that she saw a really nice car down my road. The day after that we see each other and she wants to get back together but needs to think about how she can do I leave it over night and today she says we can’t do this she doesn’t want the distraction of me and that even when we were broken up in class she was still thinking about me and that she can’t get over me. I know it’s all really confusing and she really does want to be with me but at the moment for me to get through this I just need the reassurance that after the exams she will still want to be with me. 

Sorry for this being so long

2

Hi Matthew,

I'm really sorry that you're having a rough time. I don't really have much experience with these situations but I think she needs more professional help. I don't think it's a good idea to just come off medication, from what I understand it should be done slowly, with the help of her doctor and when she feels good in herself. Has she been back to her doctor? Are there any family members you/she can go to for help and advice? 

With regards to you, I think it's too much for you to take on alone. Like you said, you have to study and it will affect your life too. 

I know that she can get better, I know of people who have come through these dark periods and are living a normal life now but there is a process that she needs to go through. I wrote on another post some of the things I would do if I had any health problem (and wasn't already doing it) I think the things I suggested are the basics and any health problems remaining should be sorted out by the doctors. 

Any questions just ask.

Good luck,

Sharon x

Here's what I said on the other post;

I'm no expert, and I don't really suffer from anxiety attacks, but I listen to many doctors who say that it's amazing how the body reacts to your thoughts and feelings. So I'm not saying that your doctor is right but it is possible that your brain is playing tricks on you.

I have no idea of your situation or how you live your life, your life might be perfect and you might already be doing all of my suggestions, and a lot more, so the suggestions I'm making are just what I would do if I had any health issues.  

If I were you I would take a step back and evaluate my life, make sure I'm only eating good, natural food.... cut back on sugar, bread, pasta, pizza, meat, dairy, all the foods that make you feel tired after eating them. Eat lots of vegetables and salads, smoothies and drink lots of water.

I would also start listening to guided meditation videos on YouTube, you can just sit, or lay somewhere quiet for 30 minutes or an hour and listen to someone talking you through it, I love it. There's a song that I listen to called Ho'oponopono, I think it's the most beautiful song in the world, try it.

Yoga, walking or any kind of exercise is really important too, even just 30 minutes per day, or whatever you can manage, will help a lot. 

I would stay as far away as possible from negative people and stress, they do great damage to your health.

Simplify your life as much as possible, try not to take any drugs that you don't need, make sure you're getting all the vitamins and minerals your body needs to be healthy and get rid of as many toxins from your life as possible. Unfortunately that's easier said than done, they're everywhere, in our toiletries, household cleaning products, food, even in our water, it's a good idea to use a water filter if you can. 

One last thing, try to think about everything you're grateful for in your life, the good feelings you get from it go a long way towards making your body healthy.

Obviously you have to listen to your body too, if you carry on feeling ill go back to your doctor, but try to forget the illness side and focus on being happy and healthy.

 

3

Hi Matthew, anxiety can make our thoughts distorted and it sounds like she is pushing you away because she’s feeling insecure. Anxiety makes us think in a negative way and she probably thinks she needs to save you from all this. It sounds like she’s come off her meds because she was feeling better but she could probably have done with long term medication until she was feeling stable for more than a few days. This is a lot for you to take on and maybe space is a good idea with exams coming up. Just reassure her that you do want to be with her and that it’s ok to take things easy with no pressure while you are going through exams. After that hopefully she will be relieved they are over and able to focus more on your relationship. All the best.