im proper stressing out today....
3 weeks ago i have my medication increased and as when i first started taking it, i had sooo many side effects, but i struggled on to work anyway (just cos i need the money!) anyway, i ended up having a total breakdown in front of everyone i work with an around 200 guests and going home...
2moros my first day back since, its been 2 weeks, and im soooo nervous! mainly because noone i work with knew about me having depression until that night, an now i wonder what they're all gonna think or say when i walk back in....
i know im prob being totally paranoid over nothing but was kinda hoping someone might have been through the same thing and could reassure me that ppl are a lot nicer than they seem, an that everyone at work wont be laughing at me behind my back....
xxx
Hey Rachel,
I can totally understand why you are stressing out but sorry to say I cannot reassure you that it will be easy walking back into work.....
However, I will say that you are being super strong in considering going back to work only 2 weeks after leaving - im certain that the vast majority of your colleagues will be caring and considerate towards you and will want to make sure you are ok. Those who say anything behind your back are the kind of people that end up lonely and disliked by everyone else.
I haven’t taken any time off between being diagnosed with depression and now, and have gone from 20 to 40mgs in that time too - it’s been almost 6 months. But that’s purely due to my own doing, im too scared to stop working thru the fear of how people will judge me for it and not being able to get back into work if i left.
Do your best to have belief in yourself and ignore those who don’t understand you, but relish the support from those who care. Depression is a horrid illness and those who tell us to \"snap out of it\" or say \"What have you to be depressed about when there are starving people in the world\" are idiots. They don’t see beyond their own ignorance. It’s only us sufferers who know how we feel and that’s why this forum is so great - we're all here to support and help build confidence in one another to enable us to carry on with happy lives.
Generally people are nice and i believe you have nothing to fear except you own paranoia.....you can do this and do it well.
All the best, have a great weekend.
Thanks hightower...
i do agree with you about the people who care an those who dont...unfortunately at my work, theres a lot of bitchy girls and 2 of my best friends there have left while ive been off so im gonna feel v alone anyway!!
i really dont want to go back, its purely because i get paid by the hour an have run out of money that im going, given the choice id have a few more weeks off yet!!
thanks for replying to me though, its nice when im stuck at home alone to know that i can come on here an talk to people who understand xxx
Hey Rach,
Sorry to hear some of your best friends have left, wont make going back any easier but im sure there must be some other really nice people there.
Bitchy girls....i know all about those lol But they are purely morons that are normally jealous of something you have. The more you ignore them the easier it'll get.
I check this site everyday a few times to see how people are doing....its been such a relief to speak to people that know how i feel.
You are far from alone buddy x