Hey Sophie!!
Don't stress! Some people, from what I read before my surgery, recovered in 6 weeks. Recovery times vary. Debridement only happened for me because they were restitching it anyway! I think mine was just an unfortunate case with several times it got infected and I was on antibiotics. My healing time was prolonged by these things, they don't happen to everyone!
My first surgery was Day surgery. I went home as I had people who could look after me and I didn't realise how difficult certain things would be, such as toileting and getting dressed.
After my second surgery, I stayed in hospital for a week before I felt like I could toilet myself and dress myself.
I only saw a general surgeon, although he had experience with this sort of thing. No plastic surgeon for me. And I don't regret that, maybe on my groin it would've been nice as the scarring ain't pretty but my underarms are great!
I'm not sure why it split open. I think because so much skin and tissue were removed, and I didn't have a skin graft, that it was one of those situations where it needed to heal from the inside out. Each day, the wound got shallower and smaller in width. It turned out great! Maybe I was moving around too much, or maybe it just needed to heal inside out. It was a bit of a set back for me, but it was worth it for how it turned out.
It was definitely harder being independent with stitches in. You can't do much as you don't want the stitches to bust. Trust me when I say, don't push yourself!!
Keep in mind, debridement mightn't be needed, I figure mine was done as they were reoperating anyway. The pain was not nice, particularly the first week after the of the surgeries, but it did become bearable. Thank god for pain killers!!
You will be okay. It's so normal to be nervous, I sure was! Just know that you will get to the other side of it and I feel it will be better for it. It isn't four months of complete unbearable pain, it wasn't for me. If you have pain management plans with your doctor, you'll be more than okay.
I'm not too sure on what else helps. I think my flare ups are less worse when I smoke cigarettes less, if you smoke. Some people have found dietary links with their hidradenitis, I haven't. I don't wear deodorant as it would irritate it (I don't need deodorant now anyway, byebye sweat glands!!) and I use skin sensitive soaps. Heat and sweat definitely make mine worse, so I make sure to shower when I've been super sweaty or to try my best to keep cool in heat. I'm not too sure in what else helps.
Honestly, the surgery wasn't the best thing in the world and it was a long process of healing for me. I'd do it again in a heartbeat. It was difficult to get through, but it is completely possible to get through. Just keep the thought in your head that this may lead to not a single cyst returning to those areas. Thats what got me through it. That, and strong pain killers. Seriously though, the pain was bearable. First few days are the hardest and then it starts to get better and better. Hang in there!
No worries on the questions, feel free to ask any others you think of. It sure helps knowing what things will be like, makes you more mentally prepared for it!