im thinking allsorts about going to work today, i dont want to but feel as though i have to go for my own benfit, i feel lost, out of control, thoughts are totally bad, i feel like not even going out of the house, doc told me not to go yet as anything could trigger me off again :-( i feel so alone and that noone wants me at all, is this right to feel like this? i need help real bad, and im trying to stay strong, i have loads of thoughts about hurting myself etc ( i wont go into detail ) life would be easier without me in it, the wife can have peaceful life ( she assures me she wont ) shaking here writing this with tears in my eyes ,
You poor thing. Why have you decided to go to work if the doctor advised against it? I'm sure your wife will understand. Are you suffering with depression?
I have just had four weeks off work with depression amongst other things. I am going back next week against advice but I am finding being at home worse. I have a lot of support at work so feel safer there. My family are great but they work and I struggle to be alone. I have also had thoughts that my husband would be better off without me as sometimes I feel he is nothing more than a carer but he assures me constantly that hes ok and happy to support me. I cant leave the house alone, answer the phone or open post because of the paranoia. The one thing I can do is work, it gives me a routine. See how you get on but see your doctor if you find you cant manage. Sending positive thoughts and hoping you turn a corner soon.
depression and anxiety grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr first day back went ok scarey but ok sat and spoke to the manager and she understood others were okish towards me but didnt know what to say etc i said be yourself and dont change, my wife picked me up came into my workplace had a cuppa tea and said she is very proud of me, i upset her on the way home saying things about another bloke arrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh i dont wanna upset her as the things i have put her through are hurting me too, i told her we are gonna have a wonderful weekend etc, im still seeping little thoughts, my mental health lady rang when i got home and gave me support and said well done you, and i have to see her for 1 and half hours on 11/8/14 for a talking to, feel a little better today for going to work and not staring at 4 walls, even if the doc said no to work, i needed this, my manager is away till 1st sept and me being a supervisor have to step in and im looking forward to it as its challenging, all i know is i love my wife millions