Had a wobble......

Bones, joints and muscles
1

Hey guys, been feeling a pretty rubbish all day.....

Had to see my (lovely) GP today for a refill and review of pain meds, and as soon as I got in her office I broke down in floods of tears! Sobs, snot, the lot!  I dont know why, but everything just hit me like a sledgehammer this morning - TKR 7 weeks ago, OA in un opped knee deteriorated to the point I can hardly walk, with the pain off the scale but surgeon unwilling to carry out surgical intervention until at least 6 months after 1st TKR, exhausted from lack of sleep, made redundant 2 weeks ago, having to claim benefits for the first time in my life, unemployed for the first time in 32 years, daughter waiting for major kidney surgery which may end up with her losing a kidney, and finally daughters pussy cat (she doesnt have kids, her cats are literally her babies) has a massive kidney tumour and has at best a few weeks left to live, maybe just days........

As I was spilling it all out,  it kind of hit home that Ive got rather a lot on my plate! My GP, bless her, provided me with tissues, lots of reassuring noises, a 6 month sick note so I can speak to the DWP and hopefully get my benefits sorted out (if I dont claim, then I lose NI contributions which will screw up my pension in later years). Shes renewed all my meds, and given me a very low dose of Amitriptyline, which at a higher doasge used to be used as an antidepressant, but apparantly at a lower dose its a very effective nerve pain reliever, and can also help with sleep. I could have kissed her! 

So all in all, I think I hit a particularly spectacular low today. So the only way is up!

Thanks for reading, hopefully my humour which is missing in action right now, will be back before we know it. 

Heres to a (relatively) pain free and (hopefully) sleep-filled night, xx

 

2

Oh Terri you poor thing xxx. It did come all at once for you.   Nice company you worked for, I must say, kick you while your down!  Glad your GP was able to help.  The Amitriptyline will help you I think.  The only way is up and don't you forget it.  All good wishes to your daughter too.   Xx

3

Well that's you sorted ! Seriously you have been very brave and I am sure that sense of humour is only dozing and waiting to pounce with new found energy.

Tkr is no laughing matter (apart from those of us who have either sailed through it effortlessly for which I am 'well jel' to the rest of us who have aches and pains in places we shouldn't) but hang in there it can only get better (?)

4

Oh Terri what can I say except bless you!!! Ive laid on the bed and cried and said horrid swear words and that was only with the TKR lol . Hopefully if you sleep better ul be better able to cope cos sleep is a great healer. Good luck to you let us no how you go on and moan away if it helps lol x

5

Oh Terri how awful for you. Hopefully now that you've had a wobble you'll feel better. Hope everything works out ok for you and your daughter. Bless you. 🙏

6

Hope getting it all 'out' helped as does the medication.

Thinking of you.

Kind regards,

Gill X

7

Oh Terri, that's so much bad news all at once. I'm glad you have a caring doctor and that you were able to spill it out, it does help to talk about these things, much worse to bottle it up.

I do hope you have a better day today and into the future. Well wishes for your daughter and her pussy cat too. I am like that with my dog too and I'd hate to count the number of times my heart has been broken because of pets. 

8

Hi Terri, how is it that one person has to cope with so much? You have had one hell of a journey evacuation, and all your news today, it is a wonder you are "sane"

Work: the bosses there should know that what goes around will come around, and they will ( hopefully) one day need someone to be sensitive to their needs, let's hope not.

Daughter: I will say a prayer for her and a speedy recovery. When does she have her surgery? 

Benifits: I know just how you are feeling, I had two car accidents 2007 which forced me to leave work,  you might find as I did that you will have the right time to recover from this terrible operation.

Amitriptyline: I was given this for Athritus of the spine neck and all other joints, I find it helps,

I hadn't thought about it till you said but I have had 6-8 hours sleep most nights since my op maybe that is why 50mgs nightly with tramadol and paracetamols????

I can just see everyone going to docs Monday morning asking for a prescription. 

The cat, it must be very hard to know what to do for the best especially as she / he is loved like she/ he is. 

I think it was good that you had a good cry, have another one! It helps,

 I did this week. Then I thought b..... This pain and promptly went for 3 mile walk!!! I wanted to prove that I was in control not this new knee.

guess what, the knee won it is in control,

I will not be doing that again for a while( physio) told me off anyway.

Any way enough of me. You will be in my thoughts, and I hope things start to turn around for you and your family, take care and don't forget the knee is in control!!!!!

we are all here if you need to talk xx

9

Thank you all for taking the time to read, and reply. Your thougts and good wishes are very much appreciated. 

Daughter has her pre-op assessment at the beginning of June, and if it includes MRSA screening, she will be operated on within 2 weeks of the assessment.

Shes trying really hard t be positive, and is planning on going in to work next week on massively reduced hours, shes been signed off for 6 weeks (she was in hospital 5 days after I was discharged!) and shes going stir crazy! 

Im usually a great believer in everything happening for  a reason - maybe the redundancy is a blessing, as I dont think work would have tolerated 2 long absences back to back - this way I got a bit of a pay out, which gives me a bit of breathing space to hopefully make a full recovery. 

Ive kept a bit of a daily diary for the past few weeks, just noting down activities, pain levels, medication etc - reading back today Ive definitely become a little lax with the ice and elevation, so its back to basics from tomorrow - actually from tonight, my legs are up and iced now as I type.

Thanks again everyone, its great knowing that others know how rotten this journy can make you feel at times. xx

 

10

You will come out the other side - feel for you - the meds will help - I took them for 28 days and feel better. Sleep is so important and stress makes your muscles tighten up so the knee suffers. Hope things work out for you.

11

Ive kept a bit of a daily diary for the past few weeks, just noting down activities, pain levels, medication etc - 

I did this too, for the first ten weeks post op, just so I have a comparison for when I have my other knee done. 

 

12

You are entitled to a wobble. Hopefully your doctor has given you a bit of breathing space to get everything into perspective. Take it easy one day at a time.

13

Well Terri, I think, considering all thr pressure you are under, you are doing remarkably well.   I am four weeks post op. And had a melt down myself a couple of days ago.  Everything seems to hit at once sometimes doesn't it?  So glad that you have an understanding GP.  Keep your chin up,  we will get there. Try to focus on the end result.  Cheers.  Sue S

.  

14

Sometimes life just isn't fair, Terri, but thank heavens for your GP. You really needed a good cry at least, and sharing all of that with us, however much we feel for you, just isn't the same as having someone there to listen.

I sincerely hope that your daughter gets through her problems (not easy, our 4-legged children) but if she's anything like her mum, I'd say you won't have to worry about her for too long. I can't say more than everyone else already has, just know we're all thinking of you, and may your employer get his just desserts in a spectacular fashion.

Denise from Oz x

15

Aww, poor you. But it will get better. I had my breakdown too. When my ever so good husband came in the door from work one day...I was waiting for him. I let go, crying and sobbing, I can't get out( it was ice and snow in NS Canada, a hard winter) I'm going crazy, etc. he didn't know what to make of me. I felt better after. Lol I had my left TKR dec 5 2014 and the other will be done soon. It's a long journey but the time is going to pass regardless, so before you know it, or so they tell me, we'll be good as new. I still get swelling, but every day is different. Keep at it and do your exercises, but you must rest too. All the best to your daughter with her health and her poor kitty. Your daughter will recouvery nicely too. There is light at the end of the tunnel. I went back to work at 12 weeks, modified duties and my work is so accommodating. I am more than greatfull. 

16

Sorry to hear of all your troubles. So many bad things going on for you now. I also take a low dose of  amitriptyline and I am sure that helps with pain, as along with pain killers my pain has been manageable .  Do persevere with taking it as in the beginning it can make you feel sleepy but that passes.   Also like you the exercises etc have made my other knee flare up ( I had a choice what knee I had done first).   I  am going to try and  wait for a whole year before I have the other done as I really want my body to have totally repaired its self.  It's a horrible time for you to have been made redundant as well. I hope everything resolves itself for you x

17

Your timing was perfect. Now she sees you as you are, emotionally and physically naked. I think often times we go to the Dr f o r a specific reason and the a lot of the entire picture isn't reveled. We walk out with a prescription which only touches on a small portion of our real problems. The cross my wife has to bear, Parkinson's disease, is a perfect example. There are so manyvside issues, digestive, anxiety, depression, fatigue, memory loss, falling and uti's that the average doc only sees her for his/her specific field of expertise. She is fortunate to have a neurologist, a Parkinson's specialist that can unravel the issues but then he refers her back to the specialist in the fields that are affecting her at the moment. Having a doc that sees you at your worst means your chances of feeling better soon have greatly increased. Hope you have a quick turn around and all goescwell for your daughters. Having kids with issues of any kind is a tremendous load to carry, no matter how old they are. Last year our oldest son went through a divorce after 33 years of marriage. It was almost like it was us going through it ourselves for a few months. Hang in there, it will get better or at least you now someone else that knows your story that you can lean on a bit..

18

We all have wobbles Terri. Part of our makeup.

Hope you manage to sort one or two things out.

Don't try to do it all at once, one thing at a time.

Take care and keep in touch.

Praying for you.

Lots of love

Sarah xxx

19

You have certainly had rather a lot on your plate recently . .Fingers crossed that things can only get better.  When you are in pain, lack of sleep, etc. the worry of your daughter's illness  . .it is all just too much for you and thank heavens you have an understanding GP who is trying to help.  Hope you had some restorative sleep last night . . Sometimes a good cry is not a bad idea either!  Let out all that stress and worry.  Fingers crossed you are already feeling a bit better, and good luck to your daughter.

20

I have the deepest sympathy for you Terri, which sadly is of no use at all to you right now.Life has dealt you some awful cards, you WILL get through it because there is no other choice. You are in my thoughts and I wish you lots of peace.