Hello everyone,
My name is Matt, I'm 22 yo, I've had health anxiety (hypochondria) for about an year and a half.
It was so terrible at the begging where I would throw up every single day.
I had some ups and downs, I started seeing a therapist around February this year and things were going great, until recently. (been about 2 months since last time I went to the therapist)
About a month ago I got to meet up with my long distance girlfriend for the first time, we've been dating for about 2 years now.
Could only stay for a week because of work, but it was the best week of my life.
During this week though, every single day I would get testicular pain, like strong one, my dad told me that it was normal since this was my first girlfriend. I was also told that masturbation would make it pass, it kinda would but it would come back again. It would pass in the morning but be really strong at night. I went to the ER one day and was told it was fine and could be blue balls, but I was passed to an Urologist.
After my girlfriend went back home things calmed a bit and the pain would only be a bit uncomfortable some times, but nothing much.
So I made a bad decision to cancel the urologist appointment.
About 2 weeks later the pain started to get a bit worse sometimes, but nothing much again.
I decided to set an appointment with the urologist again, and from then on it's been all downhill.
Before the appointment the pain was getting a bit worse and I was starting to get anxious.
The appointment happened last Wednesday, the doctor touched the testies and all that and said it was fine, but he wanted me to do an ultrasound of it.
I had a lot of things to ask him, because I was also having some pain in the groin, and sometimes when holding to not pee it also hurts on the lower abdomen area.
But I didn't say anything which I regret.
The ultrasound is set for next Thursday, so here is when things started to get bad, I am dead scared of it being any type of cancer, like either testicular or even prostate.
From the day of the appointment till today, I've been feeling awful, no appetite, not being able to eat well, feeling weak, a bit of aches on my body specially in the legs, sometimes feeling feverish but no fever.
At night I feel super fatigued and my groin area and testicles hurt a bit more.
I am so scared of cancer, I really am so much that I feel like I get paranoid like reading that it can make the breasts go bigger, so I start to look at it all the time and even sometimes I think it is increasing.
My girlfriend says it's probably all anxiety or even an epididymitis, but would any of that make me feel so awful?
I would love any opinions or just advices, I feel so anxious and scared.
It's like two of my biggest fears combined one is fear of cancer or ultimately dying, the other is not being able to have kids.
Thank you for reading, I needed to vent a bit.
Cheers!