Health Anxiety ruining my life
I've never posted anything like this before but I am sat here at the point of crisis and despair. I've suffered panic attacks and anxiety for years where I have thought I couldn't breathe and I would die but nothing like this. I don't know exactly what happened or where it started this time but I'm losing control and my mind. I'm so distressed I can't eat I can't sleep I can't relax or think of anything else.
I have had a partial denture now for 8 years and it was replaced 4 years ago. I havent taken the denture out since or been to the dentist or cleaned it properly. Suddenly about 6 weeks ago I don't know why but I became obsessed with my mouth. I took out the denture finally and underneath felt all spongey and weird so of course I googled it and I'm convinced I have oral cancer. My hard palate behind my teeth is wide and feels rough sometimes and smooth sometimes, it is uneven and I feel like it's changing everyday I can't stop feeling it with my tongue. I obsess over my gums, the palate my teeth etc and it's all I think about 24/7. I have bought steradent and now clean my denture every night and sleep with it out. I've bought advanced gum defence toothpaste and mouthwash and brush my teeth three times a day. I'm 100% convinced i have oral cancer and I'm dying. I spend all day every day feeling around the roof of my mouth convinced there are lumps etc and that i can't swallow and I'm going to die. My mouth/jaw feels like it's constantly under pressure and going to collapse and by a night time my gums feel like they are burning. I'm convinced I can't chew when I eat or swallow. I can't sleep or eat for worrying but I'm too scared to go to a dentist because I know they will tell me I'm dying. I can't escape the thoughts and the fear I feel like I'm losing my mind and I don't want to be here anymore. I did have abdominal surgery two weeks ago and had to take the denture out for that and I keep reassuring myself that the anaesthetist would have noticed if something was wrong when he intubated me but would he have even looked???
I'm also seeing the number 23 everywhere over 10 times a day and I'm terrified it's a sign that something is going to happen to me. Clocks read 23 past or every day i see 23:23. It's on tv, Facebook everywhere. Something is trying to tell I'm dying. I don't want to die. I just feel like I need to escape but it's myself I want to escape from just to get a break I feel like clawing at my own head. I am honestly too frightened to see a doctor or dentist about this as I know what they will say. Tonight I have also looked in the mirror and noticed one of my nostrils inside my nose is almost closed its like a slit and I can't breathe through that side but have no mucus. I'm convinced this is the cancer spreading to my nose.
I can't explain how much this is affecting me. I am going crazy and losing grip on reality I can't go out, read books, watch tv there isn't a second of the day I don't think about it.
Just to add I know I probably sound absolutely crazy but to add some background I have a high level manager job and I am very good at hiding this. Nobody in my life including my family or partner have any idea that this is going on.
you haven't been taking care of your mouth big time. only a dentist or oral specialist can help you with your problem and give you the reassurance you need you made me an opinion and a second opinion before you feel confident.
I have always brushed my teeth at least twice a day with the partial denture in as its only one tooth. I didn't mean I never cleaned my mouth, sorry if that's how it came across.
You still need to clean under your partial. And you didnt have bad breath??
First of all they do pre surgery bloodwork before they use general anthesia. They do vitals and check bloods. So any raging issue would have been detected. At least that is required where i live. So what you need to do now is go to the dentist or a periodontist and let them examine you and fix it.
Sounds like you are catastrophizing things. You might benefit from seeing a good cognitive therapist, Leigh, since your thoughts seem out of control and obsessive. You really don't have to live like this. I will be praying for you.
leigh I am a believer in synchricoty of numbers and the number 23 means I dont know if you believe in angels or other beings but its letting you know they are around trying to help you stay positive I always see the numbers 555, 11:11 or 111 so its not about anything going to happen my love
Thank you everyone. Can anyone tell me what their mouth feels like on their upper gum behind the teeth? I have a horizontal flat bit that suddenly dips and curves back to my throat. I have what almost feels like inner tubes behind my teeth and then some smooth bits and dents on the flat but.
I know it sounds ridiculous but I am too frightened to go to a dentist I can't bring myself to do it. I have tried to shine a torch up and the bits I can see look a normal pink colour. My partial denture still fits it isn't loose or very tight so does this mean the shape of my mouth up there has always been this way?
How do I get myself out of this mindset of constantly 24/7 thinking about and feeling around the top of my mouth? I genuinely feel like I'm going to lose my mind and that I'm going crazy. All I keep thinking is that I'm going to see a doctor or dentist and they're going to send me straight to hospital because I have oral cancer and I'm going to die.
I know it's stupid that I never took the denture out but I am only 25 and I was so embarrassed by it. Now I am using steradent tablets morning and night and cleaning my teeth with a pro gum health. My
Gums are not bleeding which I think is a good sign?? And I don't have toothache. My jaw hurts and I feel pressure which makes me think my mouth is going to collapse but I don't know if this is due to stress? but then I add in other symptoms like feeling so tired and no appetite and an upset tummy etc and think I must have cancer. I'm losing my mind I'm going to end up in a mental facility I know it.
They did take blood but I think this was just incase of a transfusion. They checked my vitals and they were all fine and I had a laparoscopy done and other than endometriosis they didn't find anything. I had to take the denture out for surgery so when the anaesthetist put the tube in my mouth would he have seen the roof of my mouth and noticed or would he not have looked?
Thank you so much. I've had CBT twice before due to panic attacks but the second time I didn't feel helped so I stopped. I have also been on sertraline in the past but stopped as it was affecting my sleep I was waking up at 4-5am and only having 3/4 hours sleep a night. I really want to believe that this is just anxiety but it is so hard to convince myself. I am suddenly very aware of death and it's hit me that I will die one day so why not now?
I was just too embarrassed to take it out and too scared that it would break. I never suffered from abnormal bad breath and I was cleaning teeth anyway twice a day with the denture in and never noticed anything unusual.
let the dentist examine you without expressing any of your concerns then express your concerns and let him examine you again
Yes, the anaesthetist would have seen the roof of your mouth when you were intubated.
Go and see your dentist and ask her/him for advice.
You must go to the dentist. Call and tell your doctor you need something to calm you because your having extreme anxiety but must go to the dentist.
Hi I suffer with anxiety too and the symptoms you were just saying the achy jaw and upset tummy ect .... I get all this when I'm anxious sometime my lips and mouth tingles too. It's so hard to just think anxiety is causing it but it really is it does crazy things to your body and you convince yourself your ill. You really should try and go to the dentist just to put your mind at ease. Also I didn't tell anyone for a long time that I was feeling strange and I got so scared I ended up telling my mum , it's the best thing I ever did its so much worse keeping it to your self! Xx