Hi,
I belive my partner is and has been suffering from Health Anxiety for 7 years.
The doctors are unable to find anything wrong with him that would explain his unability to live a normal life, leave the house and work. Sometime even leave the bed.
I would like to know what can be done to help someone who does not belive they have health anxiety as it seems no one is taking control of the situation.
Our lifes have fallen apart and he is still trying ot find a physical answer to his illnes and believes that anxity makes him worse but is not the cause.
I just feel so lost and like we will never get him better unless we address the health anxiety.
Thanks
have you seen a psychiatrist about this?
Richard
I can not get him to see one as he belives his pains are physical...
how about a GP apointment then?
Richard
Hi, I feel for you, anxiety has so many symptoms it can make you feel so ill and affect all the body in many different ways. It is difficult to think that it is anxiety when you have all these symptoms and feelings it makes you feel depressed after a while as feeling ill all the time brings you down. It does get better. I have been the same in the past, was ill for a long time but I got better. I am going through this abit now again after years of being so much better. I have to keep making myself do things as I do not want to go back there but it is very hard. I hope your partner gets well soon. Tina
Maybe try to do some excercises to do with proving it is not physical. Next time he has a 'health worry' that would need dealing with right away, ask him to post pone dealing with it. If he does this and sees that nothing will happen physically, maybe he will start to question if his worries about hisa health are accurate.
What sorts of health worries does he have? x
He is seeing a GP who is investigating him for Gastro pains and he is currently awaiting a follow up appointmanent at the hospital with a specialist after finding mild gastritus and duodinitus.
Other doctors have over the years said health anixity but only refered us to group classes explaining the basics of CBT and Fright and Flight. And as he dont belive it is health anixty he wont take any of it on bored.
He believe there is something wrong with his belly area. dispite extensive tests, he says the doctors havent tested everything.
I cant even get him out of bed on the bad days.
its a visious circle, i really feel there is not specilisms for this area in the NHS and they need to take control more.
How does someone with pains that hurt so bad accept there is noting wrong and listen to the doctors just trying to give tablets for anxity. he feels his organs are failing on him and he is not being taken seriously.
Hi Tina,
How did you come to accept your pains are not real.
Thank you
I read your post and know how hard it must be for you. As a long-term anxiety and panic disorder sufferer, I have put the physical symptoms down to everything from heart problems to hormones/thyroid- the medical websites only made me think I had everything wrong with me apart from what it is = Anxiety Disorder. I was not leaving the house, phoning in sick for work, only going anywhere if I could clutch on to my partner's arm. I then woke up to the fact that only the doctor could help me. Examinations showed no heart problems causing the palpitations and shortness of breath, along with choking sensation in my throat. These symptoms are classic Panic Attack. I was given various medications, such as Propanalol which calms and slows the heart rate, on a need to take basis. Then was prescribed Cipralex (Escitalapram) - a longer acting anti depressant effective for anxiety. Over a period of weeks, that did kick in and worked for me. I also underwent a 13 week course of CBT therapy. No more panic for several years. So last year I stopped taking it, thinking there was no more need for it. A month or so ago, however, after a period of stress, the palpitations started up again - as well as being short of breath, sweating and blurred vision. One panic attack after another, making me have to take sick leave from work again and hardly able to go out - I cannot drive for fear of an attack, nor even go shopping or to my gym alone. I now am back on Escitalopram, waiting for it to kick back in again (takes some weeks, during which time Diazepam gives instant relaxant during an attack) and get my life back as it was before I stopped taking it. Like you, my partner has a problem with this condition - it is not nice to witness nor live with, as well as me being off work and not earning to help the household expenses. My only social life is people coming to the house. I know it will get better again, but waking up each day wondering if the tightness in my chest is the start of another panic attack is part of the cycle. I can only urge you to get your partner to seek advice, medication and CBT therapy/psychiatric help. Good luck.
Hi, I do not believe the pains were not real because the anxiety does cause real pain it is real anxiety can cause so many ailments. The ailments are not in the mind, they really happen . Tina
Hi Anne,
This does sound so familiar with him, it is such a struggle.
He has agreed to see someone for anxity while still exploring the pysical side.
But i will need to pay for this privately as i can not seem to get someone through NHS.
Also it seems really hard to find someone who specialises in this area.
It seems there is no help put there and its so hard doing it alone
I know it is unfortunate that they are not more capable and I agree with what you think about their care of this area.
I understandit is a difficult situation for you both.
What does he believe will happen if his belly is not extensively tested?
For your own peace of mind and some ideas I would look up a book on amazon called metacognitive therapy for anxiety and depression. I read it for my GAD. I think it will help you, to help him because it is focused on countering the beliefs you have about thoughts, feelings and 'evidence' for worries. Im sorry I cant be more help! x
Sorry, i know they are there. I know that health anxity is proerly worse than having a actual condtion that can be cured.
I can see he is in so much pain which is why it is oftern so hard for me to only tell him it is health anxiety.. cause what if.. you know.
But how did you accept it was Anxiety?
He just feels the doctors are missing something, he is now mentioning that they have not done a colonoscopy and that he is going to ask for it.
He feels that he can not function because of the pain he is in. I have text him again this morning and he hasnt even got out of bed to eat or go toilet cause he feels if he will get up he will get dizy and collaps. although he never has fainted.
thank you for the book recomendation.
I just feel so helpless.
I know but there are people who have got over this so I hope that gives you some strength. This isnt a reflection on you and you are doing a brilliant job at egtting him the help he needs x
I am getting all the medical appointments/therapy through the NHS via my doctor. I don't understand why you would need to go privately, although some people prefer that options in terms of getting a quick appointment. In fact, today is a big day as it is the first session - at the surgery - with their in-house therapist, to assess my case and discuss referral to either a CBT therapist or mental health professional. I have for years avoided the latter (the 'stigma' of the words mental health), but now I feel if this is going to be a recurring trend in my life I need to get to the root cause to properly deal with it rather than be on medication all my life. It takes a big crisis to launch into the doctor/therapist/specialist circuit and I am sure you and your partner will recognise when that day has come.
Can I just say that your story sounds like my life for the past ten years!! I've put my partner through a lot of rubbish because I've never been convinced I have health anxiety!! I've had pains everywhere! Bowel problems, heart palps the lot! The trouble is the symptoms are real and there's nothing to say you can't have a illnes or cancer or anything else! There lies the problem you will never convince him as I was never convinced! He will reolise in his own time that he's got anxiety and that he is wasting his life worrying! Just support him if you can or if you want to as this could go on for years! Sory but it's true!
The way I reolised what was going on was I had a full body mri scan costing £1500 and a complete mot bloods the lot, cbt helps plus taking away stress from your life! But it's down to him as you will not convince him I know!! If it is anxiety that's making him poorly then after a couple of years and he's still alive and kicking then maybe he will except it as anxiety!! Good luck simon
Hi. I accepted it was anxiety after being ill for a long time with it. My doctor put me on antidepressants which I didn't really want to be on. After a couple if months I started to feel a lot better and found that I wasn't worrying about every ache and pain I got and the symptoms wore off I felt much better physically and my head felt clearer. I kept saying to the dr that I wasn't depressed but he said these tablets were more for anxiety. Now ten years later I am feeling the same again even though I know deep down it is probably anxiety I still think in the back of my mind what if it's this or that. But I have been ill for three months with gastritis caused from H Pylori so where this has dragged on I think it has brought me down. I do hope your husband feels well soon. Tina
Sounds like it could be depression. iI have had depression for many, many years, and anxiety goes hand in hand with depression. Anti depressants did make the depression and anxiety go away. Last year my doctor got me off the medication, the depression is not too bad, but the anxiety has come back with a vengeance. Perhaps I should have stayed on the medication.
People do not like to admit that they may be mentally ill, and would find the diagnosis hard to deal with. Your partner should discuss all his sumptoms with his GP. If they feel it is physical, or anxiety, and not depression, then at least he has the answer.