Hi. I am a sixteen year old male who has suffered with minor anxiety such as phobias of elevators until recently, about a month ago, when I experienced a panic attack for the first time. This event started my time with severe anxiety, progressing into depression and later insomnia.
After I experienced the panic attack, and then some more that following weekend, I began believing that something was seriously wrong with me. This sent me into a small period where I wouldn't eat because of my fear of going insane and loosing touch with reality. Besides this fear I had numerous others such as fears of harming myself, fears of harming others, ending up in a mental hospital, doing things I would never want to do and becoming so mentally unstable that I would not be able to lead a normal functioning life(I had OCD at a higher level as a younger child than I currently do now, and I know that OCD takes play in my intrusive thoughts).
After I opened up to my mother about these fears, she took me to a psychologist who prescribed Citalopram(SSRI). I've taken this pill for 8 days and have saw a change in my sleeping habits. I know that the antidepressant will take about 4-6 or 6-8 weeks to fully work, but I need help with ways to calm my anxiety/depression and the crazy thoughts I have.
Today my anxiety brought back the same fear of self harm and I began thinking of it so much I started questioning if I were suicidal and then later began believing I was. This was such a scary feeling that I cannot describe it. The only way I managed to calm myself was by looking online and kind of relating with what other people said about these thoughts. I managed to get out of that thinking pattern, but found myself worrying that I will start to think and feel that same way.
My anxiety makes me scared, thinking my mind has more control over me, and that I will loose control and end up doing things I don't want such as harming myself or others. My anxiety also tends to make me think of anxious/depressing feelings and thoughts when I'm feeling tranquil and not worrying.
Can anybody list ways to help deal with these anxious thoughts and help me understand that I won't actually do things such as self harm? I need to learn positive thinking and stop thinking of my fears. Thanks so much for the help!!!!
P.s. If there are any good shows or books to help with how I am feeling, please let me know. Again THANK YOU SOO MUCH!!!
Hi anthony.. FAB work joining up to this web site.. not only will you be able to find support but tons of ideas by reading other peoples experiences and living with mental illness.. Just remember that the thoughts you are getting are ONLY thoughts.. Can I suggest writing down an action plan eg; breathing, meditation & relaxation music, awareness of senses such as touch, aromas etc., check out the huge range of things to try. If something does not suit, find another. Busy yourself searching for alternatives, try peoples advice & what works for them. Its important to keep your mind busy but not in overdrive where you will be overwhelmed & become anxious. Massage is a good way to relax also. A little pampering is what we all need & deserving of it.. Im sure you will have many replies to your post.. stay strong, keep your appointments, increase them if you feel they are helping you refocus & control your thought patterns. Diet is also something that should not be overlooked, I prefer to call it 'brain food' lots of proteins, nutrients & vitamins.. create your own shakes (nutrient drinks) vegetables, fish, meat are all important.. Keep posting & share how you are going
Anthony, first and off the subjuct, reading your post, it's hard to believe you are only 16. You write stunningly well. A pleasure to read. Now let's see how I can help. All of us in this forum are dealing with anxiety, so we know just how you feel. That is important for you to know. Most people who have never been there don't really have a clue what this scary thing is. After many years as a counselor and now retired I thought I understood it. Until it came and knocked on my door, I never really got it. Many doctors, nurses and counselors really don't get it and sometimes take it lightly or even laugh at the idea of the hell it can be.
Those terrifying thoughts are ALL anxiety talking. It's not real. They are only thoughts and cannot harm us unless we let them. The first step has been taken, you are on meds. They will help ease the anxiety to a point that you can think more clearly about everything. When those nasty terrifying thoughts occur, I literally say, oh no you dont! You are only a thought and not real, so get lost (or SHUT UP) Immediately, I refocus. Physical activity works best, play with the dog, do some tai chi, yoga, shoot hoops, go for a run, do push ups, anything to divert focus. Doing something you like a lot is also good for calming the emotions which are being beat up by your mind
Now, food. I know you are young and living at home so you only have so much control of what food is available. Google "foods that help anxiety" and then, "foods that make anxiety worse." Make a list. If your mom is open to discussing your problem, show her the list and talk about it. If all can't be perfect, see if some changes can be made. Actually, since I did this and changed over I am eating lots of better healthier food that tastes wonderful while it calms me. This is very important. If I eat or drink even one of the things on the no no list, I feel the anxiety rise within minutes.
That seems enough to start with, don't you think? All will be well, believe that, and remember that those thoughts are only thoughts.
Keep in touch. I will be happy to be a coach and cheerleader. I trust that you will hear from others of the terrific people in this forum. Take care
Something occurs to me, Anthony; with your writing, grammer and punctuation skills, consider writing a book, or column for young people with the same challenges you are handling.( there are thousands) If I am right, I think you have a sense of humor. Perhaps writing from a humorous viewpoint. Like a situation comedy. It can be a tough, serious plot, but done in such a way the point is made AND people laugh. Think about it.
Thank you so much for the idea of an action plan and obtaining a better diet. I cannot wait to try both!!! Thank you for writing back to me, I seriously appreciate it.
Let me first start off by saying a big THANK YOU!!! Thank you tor complimenting the manner in which I write, but most importantly, THANK YOU for the informative response. I seriously appreciate that you took the time to create such a long response to someone whom you never met. Already reading comments from people like you and deb44437, demonstrate how supportive this website is, and I'm glad I decided to join
Thank you for the "Shut Up" method, telling my thoughts to get lost. I believe that this method will come in very useful. I'll also follow your advice and start doing more physical activity. Along with this, I will work on having a better diet.
You are so very welcome, Anthony. And, thank you, first for deciding to take action, and second for your lovely response. It's a great feeling to know I have helped. Keep in touch and let us know how you are doing and what you are doing. I'm so very proud of you for reaching out, and for taking action.
