James: what a great club we all ( on this site ) belong to, most just want to feel better and the rest only to understand what is wrong with them.
Sounds like you have a pretty good idea of what is causing the problem, so whats going to help you feel better.
I live in the U.S. - when you say Physio does that mean ( physical therapy ) ? I'm guessing it does.
My injury dates back to 1986 when I was 28 year old. While lifting a cardiac arrest victim from a car my L4 L5 disc ruptured into 5 fragments. After 5 operations it was about 11 years later when I had my fusion at L4 L5. My profession at that time was Golf, I played a lot and worked a lot. I noticed a lot of weakness in my leg and was dragging my leg a lot and after testing and several injections I was told a fusion was the way to go. I had no idea the screws would be so big and the procedure so painfull. I was back to work after 10 weeks feeling a bit better.
Over time I noticed pain in my neck, down my arm and into my fingers. The MRI revealed a C3 C4 nerve root impingement and the Dr felt surgery might help but he also said I could get better over time if I took care of the muscles in my arm, shoulder and arms. I had pain but mostly the symptoms were very much like those you described, I needed help cutting my steak, I dropped things and my hands would ache, cold weather made it worse to. I believe the fusion put more stress on my neck and that caused my neck problems.
Most of the help and relief I got for my back problems came from a Chiropractor so I decided to let him have a crack at my neck problems. Lots of moist heat, ultra sound, interferential muscle stimulation and trigger point deep massage. He also helped me find stretching methods that would isolate the areas of my neck, shoulder and arm to bulid back the muscle strength i lost. Nearly 40 at the time I knew how important it was to make the treatments a priority along with the stretching and soon after I added about 20 pounds of weights to build up my arm and shoulder muscles. Maybe I went a bit overboard but I got to the point where I was doing the exercises nearly every day. After a few months my neck was bigger by 1 inch and I had larger arm muscles. For my fingers I found a tool used by guitar players to build finger strength - it allows the user to isolate the fingers that need the work - all 5 or just 1. My little finger and ring finger needed the most work and the tool was perfect for just that. The other thing I used were very inexpensive stretch bands, I would lay on my back and find ways to isolate any muscle in my neck or shoulder I could think of. You might be surprised at how many different ways you can find to work certain muscle groups just by using your own imagination.
I went to the Chirpractor about 2 to 3 times a week for the treatments he could do and the rest I did on my own.
Never have I had a Physical Therapist that would really take an interest in my problem, it seemed like i was just another half hour to kill till the end of the work day had come.
I believe that a lot of problems stem from a few different things; Swelling, weakness and then muscle atrophy - oh yea, dont forget stress - stress can do more harm to the neck and shoulders than an injury. My Chiropractor was able to show me using a mirror just where the swelling was and its that swelling that will trap the nerve coming from the neck into the arm and shoulder. My wife is a painter and she complains of shoulder and neck pain; I can see the swelling in her shoulder / back / just below the shoulder blade. What works well is to concentrate on the muscles that start near the base of your neck and down to below the shoulder blades. Thats where most of the swelling is and that can radiate into the arm and fingers.
Sounds like a lot of work and time; I'm 57 now and Ive had 12 operations on my back. Im in lots of pain but its those exercises that do keep me going. If I get a sharp spasm I know the muscle that needs stretched and it works. Its a lifetime of takinbg care of your body / neck problem and if you dont take care of it the problem will come back and bite you in the ass.
Its been years and my neck has been great, sure once in a while it flares up but I know how to fix it and feel better. Yes I take pain meds for my back pain but they only do part of the job, the rest is on me to keep in shape and to keep the muscles that suffer in shape at all times. You can slow down the damage that a pinched nerve can cause by doing the exercises - 30 minutes a day or even less can make all the difference in the world and as a result you have much better quality of life. If you chose not to take care of the problem you can count on nothing but more of what you have now but much worse.
For good exercises you can find them on a good web site and come up with some of your own. The equipment - stretch bands and the finger tool is cheap and some you can do with no equipment by just finding ways to stretch or apply a nice moist hot pad. If you re-injure your neck use ice for about 48 hours then back to moist heat.
Do your best to avoid surgery, even if it works it will create scar tissue that will bother you later in life. If the problem gets to a point where nerve damage might cause a severe problem then surgery might be your only option and you will know if that time comes.
Lastly - always maintain a positive attitude, it makes a big difference.
Good luck James,