I have a hit abit of a wall. This week back to my usual routine on my own of getting up before the birds, cleaning house, washing, cooking and get the children to and from school. I literally can not move with exhaustion. I can't even speak I am so tired...I have had to go to bed today.
Is this normal? I typically have a full on start from 6am to 10am which is non stop ~ and nons stop again 3pm to 8.30pm or 9pm. In between I was hoping to go for walks, exercise and get things done, as I am not working at the moment (goodness knows how I would do that as well) but I am feeling floored by the time I scrape through to 10am.
Still have mixed nights, as I can't sleep on my side or move all night, lying stiffly on my back until check up. I am waking most nights, not the end of the world, but wouldn't expect to feel this level of tiredness.
What levels of rest did you need at this stage?
Did you need to rest a lot?
Am I doing too little, too much? I keep trying to force myself to do things and then my hip starts to really hurt, as well as the fatigue. I am feeling worried that I just cant get anything done, and am wasting my recovery in a chair. I don't want to see my friends, or go anywhere. I just want to be at home. I don't think I am feeling down, I feel okay just really really worn out....I hope it will get better....I thought by now I would be really doing so much more (running theme I can see) but I really did think I would be more or less back to normal.
Basically you are doing far too much and need to rest a bit between your two periods of concentrated activity. Possibly also need to cut a few corners in those times too
Healing properly takes up to a year so in that context 6 weeks is not a long way down the road. Your body still needs lots of rest as it has been through such a lot
Most people are signed off work for 3-4 months not 6 weeks. If you had broken your leg you would be in plaster for up to 8 weeks. You haven't, you've had a hip replacement. When I moaned at my GP that I didn't feel I was getting better he said....you have had a major operation. The surgeon removed the top of your femur and hammered in a spike with a ball on top. He then drilled a new socket into your hip and stitched all the layers of cut muscles back together. It takes up to 8 weeks for the bone marrow to start growing around the prosthesis. You need to rest to let this happen.
I shut up after that. Like you I am active but although walking about a bit is good you must rest. This is your body screaming at you to let it heal.
Sorry, am not lecturing but please listen to your body, exhaustion is not helping you to heal xxx
Thank you Maggie, I thought I was me. I wondering why I can't do anywhere near as much....thank you for telling me it is normal, and yes I will definitely try some short cuts. I have been telling myself off all morning for being lazy when I literally could not bear to carry on, I was close to crying like a long distance marathon! I can rest in peace now.
Rose, sounds like your having a bad day but you seem to be doing so much and doing so well! Your only a week ahead of me. As Im not weight bearing and my children are older I'm having to do very little. I clean up a little but it takes me an hour to do what would normally take 10 mins as I'm on one leg and 2 crutches. So I stay up until about 2 or 3 am and get up early as I'm not tired as I'm not doing anything all day. I've little pain as I'm not using my leg at all. I've only just started sleeping through the night but have broken the rules and have been sleeping on my good side for a few nights, with a cushion between my knees. You seem to be doing really well and as already said you've had major surgery. Give yourself a break and rest, you deserve it!
No, quite the contary Kate it is really helpful to know why I am repeatedly feeling this way late morning. I am SO tired. When you really think about it, it is major major surgery as you say, and unlike the spring chicken I think I am,we don't just bounce back over night.
I am very active, well I used to be, and still am in my mind at least with the to do lists!! But I am not anywhere close to my life before my hip started its shennighans, and maybe I have always done too much (?) but now even the basics feel like a back breaking slog. Literally back breaking.
I am going to go and rest and try and put a few people off, I feel so bad that I am not seeing anyone, and haven't for ages. I just can't manage a conversation like this.
Thank you Kate for putting it in perspective. I have just turned 6 weeks and felt quite excited thinking it would be a 'breakthrough' but it isn't...it is just a little more a long the way slowly like a little snail, but hey we will get there!!! All of us!!
My surgery was on 12/29/15, so I am about 2 1/2 weeks out. My short term disability representative called Tuesday to tell my that I have been approved through Feb 9, which would be six weeks. I advised her that my next Dr appt is not until Feb 12, so she said she would extend it until Feb 16, which will be 7 weeks post op. It scares me to think about returning to work that soon. I know I will improve a lot between now and then, but I'm worried about over doing and not having the stamina to deal with an everyday job on top of everything else.
I would make the most of it Vicki is my honest answer. The minute you can weight bear possibly you may feel a similar pressure, I sincerely hope you won't though, because it doesnt help you recover or heal. Quite the reverse. In your position you have to rest, and take it easy there is nothing else you can do, and in some ways that is forcing you to really rest up, and get better which is exactly what you need to do.
Since my husband went back to work, I have to do everything, some things are not getting done, but some things are essential. After six weeks of resting, there is a list as long as my arm that I haven't even thought about. I have a little bit of help with the vacuuming etc which is making a difference but not much.
Everything takes forever because I am so slow, so making the beds is half an hour at least hobbling around with a crutch trying to remember to walk properly, not the usual ten minutes, the girls try to do theirs, but need help. Everything takes hours and hours!!!! I am on go slow
Make the most of your time now I would say!!! If I could rewind I would, the days before seem idyllic and restful now. I will rest more, I have to because I am not sure I can keep going endlessly otherwise even with helpful children..and now I have read the posts I do think I need to, I thought it was just me. I guess we all feel this way in the early stages.
I'm 6 months on and having number 2 in 4 weeks. You are doing really well and although all different ages and fitness we all go through the same kind of healing spectrum. It is normal!
I drove at six weeks but only a mile to a shop and back, came home and had a sleep! Didn't drive again for another week!
Everything happened slowly so be gentle on yourself, its not lazy, it is healing time.
I think this op changed my whole outlook on life and I no longer race around at top speed as I did before. Right off for a cup of tea before cleaning me chickens, and then, well another cuppa I expect, hah x
What is your job? Can you work from home some of the time or at the beginning? A week can make a big difference...but it is tough even at this stage I am tired. If you have an office job and you can line up good seating, rest periods you might be okay...although you will need to plan for very quiet evenings with lots of help at home. I am on my feet for those hours, and it is having an impact I have to be honest with you
Are you able to tell your employer closer to the time if you are able to go back? Alternatively if you are not ready, ask your surgeon to sign you off for another few weeks, they can't argue with that!
Janie most people are signed off for 3 months in the Uk with few going back to light duties a bit before. Talk to your GP and move the goal posts. I would think you will be off until end March. Employers would struggle to get rid of you before 6 months depending on contacts/time worked etc. Worrying about work does not help healing
I am driving very short distances, but even that is tiring! How can that be! I am despairing at my inability to be frank, but I think you are right. Something has changed in me forever. My old life looks stressful and rushed, my new life is that everything has to be considered and thought through first, and basically takes forever, so mindful in it is own way
I am no longer going to even try and resume my old life, better just to accept that this is the new one and relax a little.
How are you feeling about number 2 coming up? Are you excited/nervous all of the above?
When I am better I am going to get some chickens (A life long dream) so you must give me some tips!!
Rose your expecting too much of yourself. It's good your children are trying to help but I know how frustrating it is when the housework isn't done to your usual standard. It's ok people saying to let it go but I feel like my head will explode at times as no one really cares as much as I do (I am a bit ocd) I do as much as I can, transporting things round on my little trolley. I really think they are all getting a bit fed up of me now! My husband is working 6 days a week, doing the housework and most of the cooking. I just build up little lists of jobs for him and the girls when they come home at night!
I know I'm very lucky that I'm not in your position and think you deserve a medal for coping with all you are doing at the moment but you need to give yourself time to recover and look after yourself . X
I think we are the same on the house front. When I finally emerged from the fog of the operation I could only see the carnege Had a bit of meltdown when I saw the car, and the house, and the garden...and just felt the need to scream!!! But managed to compose my face into a look of gratitude to exhausted harrassed looking husband to commend the things that he did manage beautifully ( the children and animals are still alive but the rest is looking a little ratty!)
It is the one time in my life when I wish I was a little more untidy and much more carefree! Really, do my kitchen shelves have to be in order, does it matter that something has died in the bottom of my kitchen bin, will it change the world if someone has dyed my daughter's favourite top a distinctly nasty looking shade of washed out grey...no...but we now feel sufficiently well to see these things. Before I was happy in bed in my room with my eyes closed, and now, well, it is a different matter!
Thank goodness for your husband and girls!!!!!! You are very lucky! And what a kind person to come home and do it all for you. What a good idea to do lists during the day, perhaps I should do the same I can just imagine my husband's face, I am sure he has developed a hearing impairement in the last month or two!!!
I think I am bordering OCD to be honest, like you I like everything to be spotless, organised and tidy and unfortunately it just isnt possible at this moment in time! :0 no matter how much I seem to do, it is a losing battle!! It was before the op so it definitey is now....
Deep breath, everything will be fixed, repainted, cleaned in the end Maybe by the summer...so for now the winter sunshine can stop pouring into my house showing the damage over christmas, and I will sit down and rest for once...
Yes, it is a desk job but it can be pretty stressful. Maybe I'm looking too far ahead. It's just from what I've been reading on here, it seems that most people are given a longer time to recover than they seem to want to give me. I will definitely talk to my doc about this if I don't feel I can handle the returh to work date they seem to have imposed.
You are doing far, far too much Rose, your body is complaining, and rightly so I'm afraid
I was doing small amounts of work like food preparation, washing up etc, at 10 weeks and that was enough for me. Your work list makes me feel tired, just looking at it !
Oh that nasty little voice in our head !!!! I recently started a thread about hitting a plateau and I am 18 weeks today - It is so disppointing isn't it ... I feel like a sloth -
a whale .... can't stand myself at times -
however ..... healing takes energy from the body - I wake up with a plan for the day ahead - I am up around 6 AM - restless and all that - do my things and at 10 a wave of tiredness comes over me ... I do my meditation at that time - being careful to not doze off - weather is bad so not too motivated to go out but when I do it is for a one-stop grocery shopping , maybe 2 when it is sunny ...
It is not only the surgery and surrounding areas but also (I read somewhere) the rest of our body that is healing as well -
you are doing a lot darling -
I can tell myself that I had 2 surgeries, accept that this is what it is, but oh so many times recently I get fed up with this so called status quo -
So I am right there with you ....
Now, remember that "normal" (at least for me and what I consider normal) seems in another life -
Oh, I rented a stationary bike - PT advised me to do more and this is a great option - will be delivered next week ....
Haha 'carnage' that made me laugh! It's so silly isn't it when considering what we've been through this is what we moan about. You sound just like me. it's nice to know I'm not the only one who feels like this.
Eventually we will get everything back to how we like it. I blame my mum who loves her animals, horses etc,.. She never really bothered about housework so I'm the complete opposite. Enjoy your rest x
Omg you are doing way way too much!! You need to slow down!!! Don't be a hero and end up hurting yourself like me and set yourself back by weeks!!! Look after yourself as no one else will!!! You need rest and sleep !! Take care. Xx