Group therapy going great not really it seems everyone is feeling the same at week 12 out of 20. Had a bad day sorry been on the vodka most probable why I am being bad and to be quite honest I don't give a Fk, I am feeling as if the whole world and their friends are against me and paranoid that I am not alone and I am not safe. My grand-kids were around earlier and picked up my mobile I grabbed it off them but too late my blade had fallen out felt so embarrassed and useless when they asked what is that I said nothing do not touch it, put it out the way at least they didn't see the pills too. How F *ing stupid pathetic irresponsible am i but then they shouldn't of touched my phone, nothing else was said but after they left I cried and sobbed my heart out felt so useless.. Did speak to Samaritans to try and deal with this I am currently making plans to go escape my head and thoughts feelings everything. My work is going to pieces, my health isn't that great and I am so tired of fighting everything. Everyone is against me I do not know who to trust anymore everyone is out to get me I am not longer safe.I am open to persecution. Good night everyone hopefully see you in the morning. xx
Please try to stay safe xxxx
I hope you are feeling a bit better today and your hangover wasn't too bad! The trouble with drinking when you are depressed is it just makes you feel even worse doesn't it? After a few bad sessions like yours I must admit I am very reluctant to go there again and I keep a very careful check on how much and what I drink. x