I wrote on here the other day but for some reason I can't get back to it.
basically my anxiety is taking over my life. to the point I can't even leave the house without having a panic attack. I'm on mirtazapine 15mg. I have a psychiatrist who comes out to see me and a support worker to help me get out (so far I've been out once) . I had my first panic attack last year when on my way to a doctors appointment. my hands were clenched and I couldn't open them, my lips and face were tingling I couldn't move my feet, my chest was tight, couldn't breathe properly, crying I told my dad I think I'm dying. anyway it took 3 people to come help calm me down in the car and get me inside. was told I was having a panick attack and it's all started from there. I physically cannot go out of the house without going in full panick mode. if I know I have a doctors appointment the day before I have it I panick myself. my symptoms are chest pain, shortness of breath, lump in my thirst, sweating, fast heart, heart palpitations, my thirst feels tight, shaking, feeling sick. this is how I feel everyday even if I'm not anxious I have some of these symptoms which obviously because my anxiety I think ive got something but my doctor says it's anxiety. my psychiatrist wants me to have a full blood test done which hopefully I can get in soon get it over and done with. I refuse to believe anxiety is making me feel this ill everyday to the point I don't even get it of bed because it's my only comfort zone and I just feel so run down and rubbish. I remember feeling anxious at school having lumps in my throat and being insecure and out of my comfort zone but never went to the doctors about it so could it really be anxiety, I'm scared I have something wrong with me or the C word every symptom I google I'm scared I know I shouldnt. I worked since leaving school and was always out and about but for the past few years I've just been house bound and only last year did I go to the doctors about it. I've also got depression, I've been trough a lot I've just turned 21 and I'm already fed up and want to give up on life. I have suicidel thoughts but I want to get better. I want to go back to work and be able to go out and be a normal person but at the minute I just feel like such a failure and like I'm just existing💔 Also having great trouble with my eating, I'll go days without eating to the point I'm shaking and can't eat because I just feel so sick and it's just a vicious cycle. I've felt like this for so long I can't see me ever getting better i feel like such a failure. Sorry for such a long post
Hi megan123
We note from a recent post which you have made to our forum that you may be experiencing thoughts around self-harm. If we have misinterpreted your comments then we apologies for contacting you directly. But if you are having such thoughts then please note that you are not alone in this, and there are people out there that can help.
If you are having these suicidal thoughts then we strongly recommend you speak to someone who may be able to help. The Samaritans offer a safe space where you can talk openly about what you are going through. They can help you explore your options, understand your problems better, or just be there to listen.
Their contact details are on our patient information leaflet here: https://patient.info/health/dealing-with-suicidal-thoughts, which also offers lots of other advice on how you can access the help you may need.
If you are having such thoughts then please do reach out to the team at the Samaritans (or the other people detailed in our leaflet) who will understand what you're going through and will be able to help.
Kindest regards
Patient
Hi can you help me. Have you changed the forum or have I messed my phone up. Used to go to mail. Now had to get an old post out of trash and go to discussion and press on the flashing star. Any way I can get back to going through mail or am I being a bit thick? Thanks
Hi Edwina I IAM having the same problem as you on this site . I have to go my trash can . and I have got the flashing 🌟
Hi Megan, it sounds like you have health anxiety and agoraphobia. Having either of them is bad enough but to suffer bith must be hard work for you.
As for the agoraphobia you could put yourself a plan together as to where you are going to go every week, for example on week one your goal is to just go outside by the door and stay there for a few minutes whilst you listen to the sounds around you, the smells and what's going on, do this once a day for a week, then for second week, the goal could be to get to the footpath etc etc... It doesn't matter if you feel anxious doing it just tell yourself "at least I'm doing it, and this anxiety will go".
How long have you been on Mirt? If you don't think it's working let your psychiatrist know.
Your going to have to be patient with yourself and you will get better.
Neil
Suppose I'll get used to it. Thought I'd messed my phone up, or deleted everything, glad not just me , thanks for replying😊❤️
Forgot to say, also can't flag posts anymore if reading and busy and want to go back later😳🙁❤️
Same here hun so it's not your phone
Thankyou for replying. I have been taking mirtazapine for about 3 months now I started with 15mg then psychiatrist upped does to 40mg. 40mg made me extremely drowsy so I stopped taking them. which made me feel really sick and dizzy which I read were sides effects of coming off them. told my doctor, she put me back on 15mg. supposed to take these at night but depending on how I feel in the day I'll take it. but recently I take it as soon as I wake up because they make me drowsy and tries and I can just sleep all day again because I just don't want to be awake. thankyou for the advise about trying to go outside, it's a vivacious cycle. I just don't feel well in myself which makes me not want to go out as well and just stay in bed. I'm just stuck in a fut and don't know what to do X
they make me drowsy and tierd and I can just sleep**
Ive just come back from CBT , I do have anxiety cause quilt. She told me that we all human and we make mistakes. We cant changed what happened but we may learn from it and become better person than we were before. Cant live in the past. People make mistakes but it doesnt mean they have to pay for it for the rest of their life.
Hi Megan you really need to stop skipping your medication take them on a regular basis to see if they can help you.Neil is right you must try to set yourself small goals and start to increase your confidence.Also try to do some relaxation so you are not constantly obsessing about your symptoms.You need a lot of support from your family and a good therapist would help you a lot.Accept you suffer from anxiety and start to rebuild your life.lt is hard work however you can do it.
Hi Megan, many years ago I was exactly where you are, I struggled so much to get out using every excuse you can think of, I started drinking as I know that feeling of wanting the day to pass and just sleep, I didn't confide in anyone as I felt no one would understand the weird stuff in my head. When drink stopped working and affected my health i eventually got medical help . I , at that loony felt like it would have been easier never to leave the house, . If you are taking your pills now to get the day over with quicker it's a definite warning sign. Please don't waste your life as I almost did, and I caused a lot of worry for my family. There is such a lot of help now and gps etc see this so much. As Aspinan said a plan would help, baby steps, something to aim for each day. Know if your like me you'll be tempted to put this off but please don't. I have a life now, yes, I get anxious and my head can drive me mad but I push myself a little harder , . Lots of lucky people bounce out of bed each morning, unfortunately I've never felt like that. But I can look back on my day with a sense of hapiness if I achieve something small or just generally have a good day now. I took all the help available, by far the best is talking, people posting here know how you feel and will support you give you great advice, I don't think anyone, even though they try can understand unless they have walked in our shoes. There is hope Megan. I used to scream at people who used to try to force me to go out and do things, now I thank them.😊❤️