I don't know how to help someone who is struggling with his counselling

Mental health
1

I have been with my partner for 3 years and about a year ago we moved for his job after leaving the armed forces. He has really struggled with this as it is so different. He also has a lot of issues with his father from the way he was brought up (his father has also sadly died this year). Thankfully he knew he needed help and started going to counselling . After his fourth session two weeks ago he came home like a completely different man. He was cold towards me and said he wanted me to move back home. I'm not the only one he has taken this out on after blaming this on his family. I'm so sad because he says he's so messed up and doesn't want to upset me. Since talking he says he misses me, loves me and does want to give it ago and thinks we will be happy but he's scared. It upsets me because he keeps getting so upset by it but then pushes us away. Although he has said he needs space I'd hate him to think I'm not there for him anymore. He is the love of my life, I just don't know how to handle this. Can anyone help?

2

Maybe he does need a bit of space (and time) to unravel himself.

Could it be that you also need help and support to cope with him?

Try to find some back-up just for yourself.

Start with your GP and explain the situation to her/him just as you explained it here.

3

Hi Shirley 

your right im so confused and don't know what to do to help him. I will get straight to the doctors to see if they can help. thank you 

4

Hi Hayley,I was in the services and yes it's very very different leaving the big family behind and heading into civvy  street,but,he has also a responsibility to sort himself out and you are sounding extremely supportive,glad he's gone for the counselling,maybe he needs time on his own to put his head together ,wish you all the best

5

Thank you Ellen it's really nice hearing from someone who has gone through it them self. I'm hoping his counselling will start to make sense soon and start making him feel a little better. I'll keep giving him his space and pray he starts to make sense of everything

6

Hi Hayley,I've gone through coming out of the navy, not depression,but I can imagine