I'm pretty new to these kind of forums so sorry if what I am about to say sounds utterly bonkers, but I've developed this fear of getting cancer, I feel like an utter coward and a fool for feeling like this and especially selfish to all the brave people out there fighting it.
I can't really define what has triggered this fear as my family thankfully are very healthy specimens, however I know alot of family friends that have got different kinds of cancer, some lucky and still in remission and others not so fortunate.
I constantly fear that I have cancer, a tummy ache and i have stomach or bowel cancer, a headache and i have a brain tumour etc I am constantly poking and prodding at anything i think isn't normal for me. Its gotten so bad that i have myself in a routine now to keep myself sane, I wake up in the morning and read something awful that has maybe happened to a young female like myself and all of a sudden they have either been diagnosed or have died from cancer and then i totally freak and will pick up my laptop and check symptoms and then convince myself that I have it and then will end up having a panic attack followed by uncontrollable crying, I can't do this anymore. I have a great loving partner but this is a special year for him so he needs to be committed to the project he is working on not being my carer 24/7. I can't eat properly any more or even go out the door without fearing i might take a panic attack, I am trying to keep positive some days but I'm finding it tough, we have recently moved to Bedford so I don't have any friends to go see or talk to and take my mind of this.
Is it always going to be like this? i feel so trapped and bullied by my own mind at the moment. I just want to be normal again.
I would really appreciate any advice or tips on how I can kick this.
Thanks everyone.
x
im exactly the same as you. It's terrible feeling. I get myself in such a panic. Iv been the docs an they have put me on clitrapram. An Iv also been for cognitive behaviour therapy. Which I found really helps. The more u think u have a pain it becomes real. Iv also found by asking all these lovely people on this difrent ways to relax. The one I find help is reading. Takes your mind away from everything. But I really think cbt really helps. Hope you find something to help you. Xx
everyone has their own personal fears and anxieties so don't feel alienated it is perfectly normal. We all fear death and this thought about getting cancer may be linked to general normal fear of dying. Keep talking on the forum and you will get lots of advice.
Richard
No one here will think you are bomkers! You won't be judged here as we have all got our own anxieties and cancer is a poular one if that is the right term! I think personally its time you saw the doctor, CBT is very helpful and you might need some meds for a while to lift you out of the fog...hope this helps, and hope to see you sticking around for chats, we're very freindly here
Hi I want to be...
I am new here too but I have found reading words of encourangement here very helpful, simply knowing that I am not the only one feeling this way helps a lot. Sally recomends reading, I read a lot too, I also find walking helps, especially if the sun is shining, anything that distracts you from your worrying thoughts helps. I have been assured that this will pass and I believe that (kinda have to dont we).
Keep talking anyone who will listen and that includes us.
*hugs*
Hi I know excatly what your going through as I am the same. It's awful most days I wake up and think about it. I find it so hard to because I have a 2 year old boy and I just think what if I don't see him grow up etc. It brings me to tears most days.
I find going on long walks helps a little bit and chatting on here as you know your not the only one who is going through this awful aniexty. I suffer bad with the dry mouth and stomach turning so bad with my aniexty.
Make sure u write on here and we all help each other.
Everyone fears disease, but to obsess only makes matters worse. I read similar concerns about the fear of cancer, well I've had an aggressive form of cancer which was diagnosed in 2005. I don't know why, since I used to have panic attacks, but I didn't have major anxiety.
I always thought positive, followed the doctors advice, and even worked out after the procedures. Your mind can be of great help, or not, that's your prerogative, you can stress. or you can accept, accepting is the great healer. To always worry is counter to feeling well.
Many find it easy to give anxiety labels like it's a mental disease, which IMO is wrong, it's an elected disease brought on by a fear of the unknown, then it manifests into physical problems.
Yes, many need help, but to obsess when there is no disease is self defeating.
I do see what you are saying, our anxiety is not like a disease, but there is often a chemical imbalance or a hormone issue, and looking after our mental health is just as important, if not more than our physical health. Some of us have better coping strategies than others, some have to be taught, some had them but forgot how to use use them and needed reminding... Its just our nature
@ Trikkerguy
Saying that anxiety is an "elected disease" is like saying we elected to have it, we chose it - I never thought to see that here. You say it is someones "prerogative to stress or to accept" - accept what?
We know that to "obsess when there is no disease is self defeating" we are not stupid, but all that sense doesn't help when you are gripped by the fear, anxiety & panic.
I am feeling bad as I write this, I am sure you did not intend to upset anyone but you did, I am fighting my anxiety, as we all are here, we dont want to feel this way. WTF is this forum for
Thank you so much for your words of comfort, it means alot to hear from someone else experiencing this too. I am going to go see a Dr within the week and I feel i will be able to explain this better to them now that I know I'm not alone in this. I used design and illustrate but since the anxieties have taken over not so much and most definately i love to read.
Maybe I need to get myself back in those things to help me think more positively and less time being a worry wart.
Thank you xo
Thank you Richard for your reply, I feel a slight optimisim knowing I'm not alone with this and that people are here to listen and help out.
Thank you for your reply to my issue, I am definately going to see a Dr now that I know I'm not alone in this and talking to you's will definately give me the courage to explain this to them. I feel alot more optimistic now.
Thanks
Hi sandraJayne,
Thank you so much for the reply, it is nice not to feel alienated with this, I do believe there is a light at every tunnel but for the moment I'm still in the tunnel and the only way I'll get out is getting proper help and talking to all you sweet people. This has definitately lifted my spirits a little and I feel less self destructive.
I hope you will get passed this too
x
Hi Rebecca, thank you for yor reply, it really means alot to me. I'm so sorry you have this as well especially when you have a child so young I can only begin to imagine that you face tough days too.
I feel more positive now since i started talking to people on this, I feel more brave now to talk about it to my Dr.
Take care and thank you for the advice.
Well one thing is for sure Hun. You are not in your own, many people fear illness and Cancer being I think " up there" as the mist feared.
So a lot if the time our anxiety is not caused by the thing we obsess over. It's usually a build up of things that caused the anxiety but then we get fixated on a certain thing. In some ways I think it's our minds way if trying to distract us from the real issues.
You said you had recently moved home and your partner has a big project going on. They are both major things that may of caused you to worry. As well as all the other things in life,like work,running the home. We can get overwhelmed and then a simple thing,maybe a advert or even a thought about cancer,sent us over the edge. We are then fixated on this thing because that's where we noticed the anxiety..truth is if you look back,,,,it was probably fizzing beneath the surface for a while.
See if there are little adjustments you can make to your life to make it easier and I'm sure once any little niggles are sorted out,,,the cancer thing won't be so overwhelming xx
Thank you for your reply. I'm so sorry that you were diagnosed with cancer, you are obviously very brave and have a stong willed mind and I'm grateful for your advice.
However, I never chose to feel like this, we are all different and so is our coping methods and how we choose to deal with things. Its not the unknown that has scared me because I know what this horrible disease does and have seen how it destructs people. Anxieties and mental problems are just as destructive to a person and how i'm coping with this at the moment may not be healthy but I never chose this. I never 'elected' willingly to feel this way. Since talking to other people on this though it has given me optimisim.
Thank you again for taking the time.
You really need to try an get back to what you enjoy. It's really hard. But it dose help. If you ever feel alone you can always talk on here. People don't judge you an are very reassuring. I'm very new to this. But people have really helped an give good advice. Iv been so scared to go out incase I faint or have a heart attack. Iv made all kinds of excuses. Iv also had pancreas cancer bone cancer an many more. All in one week😁. But I'm slowly getting there. I hope you do to. Xxx.
Nobody willingly chooses to be this way Hun. I mean seriously........
Option 1- I will give you loads of symptoms and major paranoia making you feel like you may have cancer,but really you know you haven't but I will just send you a bit of panic just to make you believe it a bit more!,
Option 2-You can pass and have a normal life!
Like anybody chose option 1 ppfft
These things happen when our minds are vulnerable so unless you know all the signs running up to it,then it's almost impossible to prevent. I look back now and see the signs and my behaviour and way running up to this but at that time I was so busy that I didn't notice and if I did,I was to busy to slow it down and realise the consequences.
In time we will all be ok. Some will take longer than others but we are all trying to get to the same place in the best way we know how. That place is easier to reach if you can share your experiences,get reassurance and empathy from those who know just where you are coming from.xx
When I was obsessed with the hyperventilating I elected to keep thinking about it, I elected to obsess with the feeling, I brought on the panic, I brought on the anxiety, me, no one else. I was fixated on that incident, I kept reliving it, I brought myself to a world of mental anquish.
What I mean by accept, is accepting what this anxiety is, it's our fight or run inborn instinct, we all have it. i elected to trigger this instinct, this fear, this fear that fed on itself creating a panic attack.
I know you can't be logical when there is fear, I know that in order to resolve this fear we must accept what it is, "OUR MINDS ARE BLUFFING OUR BODIES". We give authority to our fear to create more fear, which breeds, and increases the flow of anxiety.
So, after time I accepted what I was doing to myself, I was conditioned, I had a very bad habit, and all habits can be stopped, not forgotten, but controlled. That is accepting, coming to terms with yourself, realizing we do have self control that we may have tempoary lost, remember we, us are always changing, never staying the same, lets give us that chance.
I have this exact same fear . I have a good gp who has helped me through this in the past. I am going through it again now and its hard. First time I have used a forum but I hope that talking to people with the same fears will help. Hate this happening its so hard to get out of. Seeing gp again this evening re horrid tummy pain. Try not to Google symptoms though that much I have learnt!