Have been on all kinds of antidepressants, which made me go worse...was only very sad and lonely after late bereavement over my husband. I was put on different AD's and perscribed a low does of Diazepam, to help with the side effects, which again didn't help. I have lost too much weight over the last 2 years, and have gone much worse. came off the the last lot of AD's3 months ago, and now down to 1.5 diazepam 3 weeks ago... I feel so bad reducing these Diazepam, can't think straight, memory loss, not sleeping no appetite, anxiety through the roof, even equired OCD very bad and getting worse last March, the list goes on, did not feel like this 2 years ago, just very sad..... can anyone help PLEASE, I am so desperate... Hilary
I have had depression and anxiety for 2 years now, due to late bereavement, and gone worse. Pls help
Hilary I am so sorry for your loss and all the sadness that you are enduring. I am coming off diazepam too but they did work for me. Maybe you need a different type of anti depressant to help you. I felt like you for about 2 weeks and I found it unbearable. The fact that you have struggled with this for so long actually shows how strong you are. Please go see a DR and maybe try some therapy. Medication can stop working so maybe it's time for a change. Good luck. I hate to think of you suffering like this x
I'm sorry for your lost as well. I have been depressed since my mother passed away. She was my best friend, confidant, and the one who knew everything about me. I started taking Lexapro recently and it seems to he helping me a bit. I started having severe health anxiety recently with things I've been going through. Mom always took care of me while I was sick even as an adult. She was always there and it's hard now to deal with things without her. But I have to. I am going to a for a referral from my GP to therapy and I'm hoping it will help. I find prayer helps as well. I hope you find peace. Best wishes.
Benzos make everything worse. And yes, Benzos cause OCD and intrusive thoughts. Have you tried mirtazapine at bedtime? I take 7.5mgs.
Tknow hanks Joanne for your reply.... I tried all different antidepressants, and gave them long enough as well, but they all made me feel much worse. I went 2.5 years and felt fine, and then bereavement hit me, and felt very sad, but I did get on with it and still went to the gym, just waited 9 months for counselling, in the meantime the doctors said why not take AD's , right I started feeling bad, could go about my normal duties or even get to the gym, I started getting very scared and with in myself, it then went from 1 AD to another, lost my appetite, lost too much weight... I take Levothyroxine, and I think in my case they don't mix, I know they work for most people, and I did hope they would work for me, I have gone from just being sad to not knowing myself anymore, I am very scared, and this was not me 2 years ago... I haven't taken AD's now for 3 months, but still on the last of diazepam 1.5ml, was on lorazepam came off that to take 4ml diazepam, which was a big drop.... I think I am going through withdrawals, I cant think straight, full of anxiety and no appetite, don't get me wrong, they are good when your on them, but it's the coming off, I felt much better not on tablets, and I am aiming for that, and hoping i can get back to 2 years ago. I think in my case the meds have stopped me grieving, it's nearly 5 years since I lost my husband, and i am feeling more sad and lonely than I did 2 years ago. I have had loads of counselling, and CBT, and nothing has worked for me, had I have had it before Meds, I might have been in with a chance, this is why I want to be free of Meds, to see if I can get myself back, I think it's going to take time....do feel a lot easier of a night, but wake up in the night with a lot of anxiety and i overthink...... Hilary x
Thanks for your reply Kim,,, sorry for the loss of your Mum, there is no one like your Mum...I will pray for you... You also have peace
Hi Mike, I have tried everything including Mirtazepine, nothing made me feel any better, just made me feel worse, don't get me wrong, they work for a lot of people.... I did sleep well before Meds, but not now, wake up at the moment with very bad anxiety and feel very lonly, this lasts most of the day, as I looked after my husband for years and helped him with his hobbies and also worked a lot...do do some voluntary work, but it still doesn't help, wasn't like this 2 years ago before Meds, and didn't have OCD.... Do you know If I may be still going through withdrawals...down to 1.5ml Diazepam to which I dropped the dose by .5ml 3.5 weeks ago... this has been the worse drop, cant function on anything... very scared, worrying my grown kids... I live alone... do not know what to do, done a lot of counselling, and before all this, no one could say to me, yo can.t do it, I would prove them wrong, but not now.... don't know what to do... do you think this will pass?.....Hilary
Think you make a very valid point of trying to get off the a/ds which, although prescribed to help, do not really and we end up on meds we really dont want to take as they give us side effects. Like you every time they tried a new one it was worse than the one before.
there is no doubt that for some people these meds are a great help. I just wasnt one of them, and neither were you.
they also gave me a benzodiazepam which, being totally new to this, i didn't realise how bad it was and i now find myself trying to get off it. I am on 5mg at night so you have done better than me.
i am down to 2.5 mg mirtazapine, still dont feel great (withdrawals) but attempting to get off. Psychs just try to move you from one drug to another and im sure that has made things worse.
CBT hasnt worked for me, several sessions but although i understand the principle, i am not able to put it into action. What sort of woman cannot even face having a haircut due to anxiety? Wasnt like this before.
Yes, being free of meds is the goal, whether these ‘professionals’ have killed that possibility for me remains to be seen. I just want me back the way i was.
can i ask how you got off the a/ds, was it a slow process? Mine is taking forever.
i have found that if i wake at night i can calm myself down with a couple of paracetamol which helps me get back to sleep.
hoping the coming months will help all this as i didnt have fear of things before these tablets, and dont understand where thats coming from. Wonder if it will go once a/ds go or if its from the diazepam?
good luck to you, youre further on than me, we need to just get back to normal.
i know you have told me previously that benzos are bad and i know i need to try to drop down from 5mg every night, but i see you take mirtaz and i found that was bad at giving me nightmares and more anxiety. I have got it down to about 2.5 but still on benzos. Now which cut to make next?
Well it sounds like you have tried everything and stuck with it for some time. I'm at a loss what to suggest other than to speak to maybe another Dr. Explain everything you have been through and everything you have tried. Also tell them exactly what you want...ie no meds. I hope you find some relief soon. I know how consuming anxiety is. Also a lack of appetite and trouble sleeping drains your body completely. I am thinking of you xx
What benzo you on? Dose?
Diazepam on 5mg
Hi hilery...of course you felt sad. you lost your husband...you were grieving ,and your GP give you antidepressants.?? it amazes me why they think thats the answer to everything..Diazapam helped you, mayby your lowering the dose too quickly...Take it very slowly, you will get there, no point in putting yourself through hell...Have you tried camomile tea, ?very relaxing at bedtime,I am so sorry for your loss..its hard to get over it..I know..but try and relax and dont be hard on yourself..remember you have to greave. its part of the healing process...xxxxxxx.
Ann I don't take any AD's now gave them up 3 months ago, just on 1.5 Diazepam, lowered this dose by 0.5ml 3 weeks ago, thought I may have gone easier by now, cut it down by .5ml, and this has been the hardest drop. I suppose, everyone is different. I am going to wait this time for it to level out, till I cut again.... Hilary x
Hi Mike I was first given on this last occasion Lorazepam 1ml to help with the side effects of Fluoxetine, to which i was on for 8 weeks, that was last July, when I realised How strong that 1ml was, It was as strong as 5-10 Diazepam, came off it, and went on 4 ml Diazepam, to which on this occasion the Diazepam has not made me feel good, I probably had withdrawals from the Lorazepam too, but I have been on diazepam off and on for 2 years, mostly on... I have now cut down to 1.5, and feel very anxious and frightened, hate being on my own now, and the OCD has gone very bad...I was never like this before all these meds...My last cut of .05 diazepam was nearly 4 weeks ago now, wish it would level out a little... Is this normal do you think....Hilary
Hi Mariano, thanks for your reply.... Feel very stressed today and frightened, hate being on my own, never used to be like this, this last cut of 0.5 diazepam has been the hardest, OCD has gone worse, which I only got last March, is taking over my life.... How are you going on?.... Hilary xxxx
It is the Benzos doing this to you. I am going through it now also. It is horrific. I'm 23 days into a Xanax cold turkey jump. It is scary. Just get off the benzo as safely as possble. Go at a moderate pace, not fast, not slow.