I feel like nothing is real, I feel life is just an illusion, my mother blames me for bring a laptop and leaving it at school, now she scolds me, my friend is trying to commit suicide, I cannot handle any burden anymore, I should tie a noose, and make it quick.
I feel no love to my parents, I'm forced to go to school even though am sick, I'm restricted to almost every social contacts, my parents doesn't love me, I don't see their love, I only feel their knives pointing at me, when I turned my back, I feel that when I asked my father or mother, they are mad.
I haven't cut my skin yet, I only see nerves of hate going through me, I only have 2 friends, yet others was just fake, I became nothing, no one cares, no one loves me, my mother has more love being given to my brother, and to my other cousins as well, but once my mother go front of me, her smile becames the bolt of pain that will surround me, I became limited, instead of becoming the unlimited millenial.
I'm still a student, in the grade 8, people are calling me weird, except for my two friends appreciating my intelligience, but I just show my fakest smile, fakest joy, I only sense hate, my mother stripped me off, now I'm just using a laptop that she gave me only once, she limits me over the media, where all informations are there.
I feel this, reaching my neck to strangle, I just let it be, while my parents are gone, I tried to commit suicide, secretly, by using my own made ropes from old wires.
I'm nothing, no one really needs to see this, only people who cares.
I'm happy to be nothing.