Hi I'm 21 and have seen a doctor twice now about my depression and he had signed me up to a councillor which I never went to - I realise I should of but I was too worried about it all.
I have been working for almost a year now with what I thought was depression but never went to the doctors till about 2 months ago to confirm it. I don't self harm I just don't eat and since I drive and have a car I drive erratically and without a seatbelt on, on purpose.
My depression took a turn for the worse on Monday when I was shouted at by my boss. It seemed to just let everything pour out that was bottled up inside me but I fought through it and decided I'd go to work Tuesday but on my way there I was getting more and more worried about the day and I threw up. I started shaking and getting very emotional. I just couldn't drive. I decided I'd just have to drive home and call in sick.
Now I haven't been to work since and today I didn't even call in sick I just turned my phone off and stayed in bed all day. I still live with my parents, they're complaining and telling me to "man up and get to work" which is definitely not helping.
I absolutely hate my job and don't want to go back there but a part of me thinks I should. I'd like to talk to a doctor but they were full today and now I'm stuck thinking I'm going to have to go to work tomorrow.
I'm scared that instead or going to work I'll just get in my car and drive somewhere.
If anyone can give me some help I'd greatly appreciate it.
I know that feeling. I've been sick so much my teeth hurt before because I don't want to deal with a stressful situation. Also when you don't eat, the sick is more acidic!! I can't imagine feeling that way and living with your parents and them giving you "encouragement!/hassle" too. If you can force yourself to go to work do it. It will not be anywhere near as bad as you think. Trust me I know. Also the longer you leave it the worse it gets. Then schedule counselling sessions, whilst carrying on your life, some counselling can be done over the phone too, and it does help. If you can force yourself to work do it. The further you let things slide, in my opinion, the worse they get. But that really is just my opinion.
I get the throwing up thing though, every time I am stressed it instantly goes to my stomach, and then out of it, one way or the other.
Definitely try the counselling route before medication. I have no idea if medication helps. Certainly in terms of antidepressants. See of your doctor will give you 2mg Valium, again in my opinion, and take one, to take the edge off the panic. Just to give you time to breathe. They are addictive so don't take them daily, and only ever take enough to chill you out a bit. Then y
You can possibly go to work.
But try therapy and mild and I mean mild doses of Valium before taking antidepressants.
how about grabbing the bull by the horns and apologising to the boss for your behaviour. Then if you really hate the job, look around for another one before you give this one up. They may already have decided you are not for them anyway so what have you got to lose.
Be strong
Richard
You might try anafranil--it worked for me when nothing else did, after trying the SSRIs like prozac and zoloft, which used to work for me, but eventually stopped. Anafranil (Clomipromine) takes a full three months to work, and you actually feel a bit worse during the build-up time. But you have to ignore the dry mouth, the slight weight gain, etc., and after 3 months, it kicks in and gives you your life again. You must get this from a psychiatrist--and try the SSRIs first--if they work for you, fine. But don't give up until you've been on a regimen of 100 mgs/day of anafranil for three full months. The SSRIs take a coule of weeks or longer to come into effect, too. You just have to be patient and try the med regimen. I know a bit about this subject--I have had depression episodes for the last 15 years or so, on and off, and the above is what worked for me--it brought me completely out of a 3 year depression during which I was tempted to give up, but never did.