I need help ! I feel like I’m get more and more depressed.

about 8 months ago i realized i had these spots appearing on my vagina. i went to the doctor they told me i have herpes and i couldnt believe what i heard. my boyfriend was my first. i remembered when we broke up he had sex with another girl, (long story) but he never had any outbreaks until this day!! i had gotten 3 test done one month after another month and it all came back negative. i had done about 5 tests ! ever since then every time my bf and i have sex, i get re-occuring infections and his skin gets dry and red. i had another out break and gotten a swab test done and a blood test and it came back positive but for HERPES TYPE 1. and his tests came back negative.
we went to so many doctors , and even a private doctor and everytime we get different answers. i dont know what to do anymore , im very confused. i dont want to believe that i have it since it really doesnt make sense but on the other hand i feel like i have no hope in finding even just a genuine answer…i feel so lost. this made me super insecure , honestly all want are some answers as to what this could be , how this is possible and it if is why is it happening the ways it happening.

do you have any photos?
sounds like you are having a rough time of it all round

no..dont have much photos. and yes its been super difficult