I need help :(

Mental health
1

hello I really need some advice this is my last resort im going to cut a long story shoty. 

Im 22 f and I have suffered from depression from my mum leaving me when i was about 13 I have always been socially awkward and paranoid since then, I Dont have any family to talk to my dad has been on a downward spiral ever since. 

My problem is that I am obsessed with people who have hurt me,  I Had had friendships and they have all took advantage of me and hurt me, I used to be someone who befriended anyone helped anyone and give my full self to somebody who was nice to me this hasnt got me very far. My bestfriend went with my boyfriend and i lost all my friends, I got another friend who robbed me.. I spend all my time stalking there facebook, twitter, ect.. I see them all the time as well it such a small corrupt area were i live.. 

I stalk them because I want to see if there lives have been hard to see if they have felt the pain that i have been feeling, Its driving me mad, Im so lonely and bitter I just spend my days doing pointless stuff. I care so much what others think about me, I have no friends and no life. 

I used to be full of life full of love and energy but people have just took that away frm me. 

How can i change? How can I get out of this vicous cycle? I just want a friend someone to understand and someone to trust. 

 

2

Janie ... Girl I really feel sad for the way you have been treated by the same friends who you helped going out of the way .

Nothing in this world is permanent , what has come will also go some day , so girl just move on an live your life the way you want to .

Stop hangin over to the thoughts of what has happened with you in the past.

Make some friends .. Get involved in some work ...have a daily routine and I am sure you will fly

3

Dear Janie im sorry to your situation ,you dont are alone .Who dont trust or understand is just self fisher.Sorry my english .Jen

4

the first thing that you need to do is forgive your mother for walking out on you.  If you can move on from that trauma then things could be so much different.   How were you behaving at 13 and how do you behave now.  It is up to you to change but counselling may help you get over your past.

Richard