I Had depression for over 20 years and am on medication. I had a crap life , my mum a sefish person and only bothered bout herself and the man shes with. My mum used to put me in front of her so my step dad didnt hit her. She used to take all my money , got kickes out when i was 17. And i still used to help my mum , i was a good kid and am a nice person now. I just dont get what ive done to deserve what i get, was in a violent relationship. I got out thank god, my dad has another family and they always come first. My latest rejection is my dad shouting at me on thursday, as i wanted them all to meet my new partner who is a wonderfull man. And my step sister said she couldnt make it coz she was going to dinner with a friend. And i feel she could made effort. Which i told her, shes told my dad and he was shouting at me . And told me its best we dont meet, they hurt me all my life but i still try, last time they all bullied me i came crashint down. And am scared its gonna happen again . I dont know what to do , iam heart broken , why cant they love me like i do them.
Hi I am sorry to hear your having some difficult relationships with your family. Its not your fault they have the problem and probally don't realise how much its hurting you. They seem selfish too. I have also suffered alot of rejection, my father rejected me at 11 and when i was an adult and tried to visit he would say i don't know you. I also suffered domestic abuse and think this goes back to my chidhood rejection as i had low self esteem and. All i ever wanted was to be loved. Thats enough about me. My advice is to get counselling and if you can find any courses on confidence and self esteem. This will make you a stronger person. It
won't give you answers but you will be able to deal with it better. Remember its not
you its them, they will have to live with their guilt. Look after yourself, get well, concentrate on your new partner. Best wishes. Hope this helps.
Thanxs for your reply , i done it all seen a therpist, councellor. I just cant get out my head all thats happened to me , that was a short version of little of my life. I try so hard , the depression alwaya there. I was on 300 mg of trazadone . But i couldnt function so its dropped to 150 mg. Will depression every go ?
Hi,
It's so sad that people can be so cruel, espically when its your own family.
I would confront your family, and tell them how they have made you feel, is there not sorry and still being nasty, then i would take a break from seeing them for a while.
It's not fair on you, and you deserve better. Concentrate on the good things in your life, and the people that do care about you and treat you with respect.
Take care x
I have tried to tell them how they made me feel , it dont get me anywere . Only the pain in me, i said to myself the other day no more there not gonna do it anymore. Am 43 and am tierd i dont have no more in me to fight anymore. I feel so alone in my thoughts , my kids try and help and my partner does. But they dnt understand depression. Bless they do try.... i feel so hurt and for i dont know how to handle all this again
I do understand beleive me. I have had depression for 38 years on and off, not continious thou just bad periods of depression. We can be prone to depressions due to genetics and bad experiences. In my case both. You will have good periods as well. Have you tried CBT or talking therapies these are suppose to be very good. I have had talking therapy and it greatly helped me. When you can do things you enjoy, eat healthy concentrat on yourself in a good way, your worth more than you beleive. Unfortunately you cannot change other people and make them love you, you can only change yourself, accepting people cannot love you is very hard and i hope one day you will see that its you that matters in your life. I t took me a long time to accept that i wasn't loved by my own father. I have finally come to accept that, thou he is dead now he cannot hurt me anymore. I hope for your sake that you find peace. Please get as much support as you can. Love those that love you like your new partner and accept his love in return. I still get negative thoughts i know that i cannot change the past. Think of your future. I know at the moment you cannot think this way but i hope you will get stronger.
I hear all you say elizabeth , and what you say makes sense. It be easier if it wasnt my family, i get and understand what u say. Iam a good person with a big heart. I have 2 wonderfull kids and without them i be nothing. And they say mum , your not gonna get what u want. Your searching for what os not there. All i wanted is my parents to be there and love me, you know pick up that phone anytime and talk to them. Like my kids can
How hard is it for parenta to love there kids , and i know i have to walk away before they destroy me anymore... And thats hard coz i got to accept it all after all these years of trying. I cant do anymore iam tierd ...
Thankyou so much
Keep positive, your children need you and they can see you hurting, give them your love, they deserve it.
Belive me my kids get all the love , there my world and they know that
its me that has the problem
Don't be alone with your thoughts, we are here to talk to.
i know it must be so difficult, but concentrate on your own little family, with your husband and kids, some people are truely alone, so at least you have them.
One day maybe they will realise.