Hello! I’ve been struggling with an eating disorder since I was 10 years old (I’m 20 now). It happens in the form of cycles: I lose weight and then regain it all back. Last year I managed to reach the weight of around 28 kg at the height of 160 cm, but I was unable to keep it. I feel like a loser and someone who doesn’t really have an eating disorder if I can’t maintain a desired number. Currently I’m about 40 kg, bingeing uncontrollably almost every day. I don’t know how to stop it and bring the control back. Nothing seems to work. 
What can I do?
Unfortunately, I can’t contact any specialist to resolve this issue, as I live in a country where it’s impossible, and paying therapists via the Internet is also unavailable since my country doesn’t support international payment methods.