I have had severe death anxiety in the past (2010), which was crippling ... but with medication, exercise and seeing a therapist I am now able to self cope with no assistance.
I also have minor social anxiety which I feel like is a lot better now then it was when I was younger. So that really isn't a concern.
However, for the past year or so I just get these really dark thoughts. Not about hurting myself or others... but about them getting hurt and how awful it will be for me and how I will not be able to go on. Example ... driving today I just started thinking "what if a bomb was dropped on me right now, and my car would crash and I would die... but my children would still be alive strapped into their car seats.... what if one of them got out and just wandered the woods and the other one starved to death in the car... you get the just. And then of course those awful thoughts start to give me an anxiety attack and I freak out.
I obviously need to talk to someone again. I am just worried that it isn't anxiety and I have some other mental health issue that I am in denial about. I know it isn't normal to have thoughts like this.
Hi Zenthae,
Actually, you would be surprised by the numbers of people who have these same dark thoughts. You are not alone with this. And you are not abnormal, either.
It really does sound like anxiety. You have insight. You do not believe that during the night someone will deliberately bomb your car, do you? You just constantly have 'what if' thoughts.
This is anxiety and it is horrible. Therapy and medication will really help you. I do suggest that you go to see your doctor right away and start getting some help.
Let us know how you get on.
Nope, that's just anxiety! Nasty, right? Those are intrusive thoughts. Even if you were having thoughts of hurting someone else, they are just thoughts and mean absolutely nothing. Try not to get upset by them, they will only persist. Try to have a little humor with them. The next time you notice an upsetting thought, just tell yourself, "oh there's my anxiety again" and gently push the thought aside. You are in control, not your thoughts 😀
Sarah
If it makes you feel better I am right now going through the same exact feeling. This is my second month with this anxiety/panic attacks and I am soooo.... freaked out. I pray constantly for guidance. I actually think I'm dying and I will drop dead and my family will have know idea what to do, because I am the rock of my family. And it's scares me to death that I'm in tears now😪😢. I actually read these forums for uplifting and they do work. And yes! It is anxiety. I am on a anti depressant, never been to counseling and have all other ailments going on currently( possibly needing my gall bladder out from the abdominal pains, sinuses is off the chart) hang in there sweetie, I'm here with you👍🏽 We can support each other. But prayer is powerful.
You poor thing! My heart goes out to you. I've been telling everyone to please go buy the Anxiety and Phobia workbook. It explains what a panic attack is. Usually people only need a few sessions of therapy to deal with them once they understand what they are. Your brain is just misinterpreting a physical sensation. Your brain feels your heart race and translates that to "I'm going to die". If you can train yourself to accept the physical feeling for just that, you will have less and less attacks in no time at all. Please buy the book. Also watch Monkey Mind on youtube. He is monk that used to suffer from panic attacks. I haven't had a full blown attack since I got the book understand Monkey Mind.
😀
Hi
I have the exact same thoughts and also suffer from GAD predominantly health anxiety and death anxiety!
I always imagine the worst possible scenario and it involves me dying and how my children would feel and cope without me. Its scary but judging by how many other anxiety suffers have the same thoughts it is clearly extreme anxiety.