Just been prescribed Mirt after 4 months of CBT not working!

Treatment and medication
1

I don’t think i have depression. I suffer panic attacks - severe, they have stopped me from driving / working/ going out day or night time unless i am with someone. So my life through 'panic attacks has changed 100% downhill and so for this reason (change of lifestyle) I am now feeling depression! Help, this is a downward spiral and I feel i am in the vortex, i can't get out of the suction and i am doomed. i am 47 and for the last 4 months my life has stopped. I cry every day for no reason; i feel lonely even when i am with people. I feel a 'freak' as no one else will have ever felt like me before! and i am 'certain' i am about to die, death is following me, trying to catch me. I have no drug addictions, stopped smoking, stopped alcohol, stopped tea and coffee, and i suppose i have almost stopped living, yet i cannot break out of this, oh and for 2 months i have had a mental health nurse - Alison visiting my home weekly, working on CBT with me, I feel that also is failing. I look forward to her visiting but it also sets off a panicky feeling of 'desperation in me that i need/want /have to get better' and it then dawns on me another week has passed me by when Alison visits and i have missed out on all my normal activities and routine including my job. Pressure is building up in me and is making me more ill, the stress of being unwell 'mentally' - an invisible illness that { I would not have understood before being a victim } Thank goodness i have the internet - i can speak here

- Sandy UK

Its nice here, i feel i have walked into a room full of friends - who understand ME

2

Hi Sandy UK,

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time but you are taking all the right steps towards recovery. Please don't worry about what other people think, there are many people suffering all sorts of depressive illnesses, having counselling, taking medication and suffering...you are not alone. I'm not meaning to be rude but if you are female is there any chance you could be menopausal? Just a thought. Keep going, try to keep smiling. Good Luck.

3

hi sandy

i know how u feel i was ment to be in center parcs this week but i wouldnt go because of panic attacks

i had to lie to my family why i wouldnt go and i break my heart knowing there all there having fun and i am at home

i had cbt for months but i feel like i am just saying to them the panic will kill me and then they say it wount it harmless

how can it be when ur feeling like this fear and killing feelings

but good news in on the way

u name it i been on it anit depressants i mean

but i started mirt last week and this week started the 30mg

i did go into norwich today i was so fed up i got out of my car and felt weard like a real bad panic was on the way

but i went with it and went to the shops

i felt like i was out of prison i spent loads of money and had a good day

i was even thinkg about driving to center parcs and join my family but maybe that to much at the mo

so i think these pills are going to do me good and i think as time go on u will start to go out more and more and noice ur not so panicky

but i am the same as u i feel i am alone no one understand

but i know why i got in this mess to much work worring about what every one think and to please others all the time

i use to think i needed to be never overweight always have the best clothes on and look great all the time for people to like me and for girls to fancy me as i never dream of asking a girl out for a drink

i thinking now more we got to change to for the panic to change

to people really worry how we look ?

worried if we have panics ?

i think we both know the answer is no

people worry about them

and we got to be more like it

i hope this help to know ur not alone i am in this one with u to i feel the same as you do everyday and i hope we both get though this nightmear

good luck anyway and i hope u find in you a ramdom thing to do like my trip to norwich

all the best

stefen

4

Dear Sandy I'm sorry that you are suffering in this way. What you describe here is classic depressive illness. It has taken a brave step to describe your feelings on here. There is nothing to be ashamed of. You are ill and need treatment which hopefully you are getting from the mental health team?m Do you have a psychiatrist? A referal to a specialist will always be benefitial? When you are feeling a little better then maybe seeking out some CBT or talking therapy might be benefitial and supportive. At the moment one day at a time is probably all you can face. It does get better. I have recovered from depression. I have become ill and become well again..

5

Sorry Sandy. Forget the CBT until you are feeling better.

6

I agree with Pooh, the CBT is best left until you are feeling better. Then you will have the strength to think about your maladaptive thought processes. I tried CBT when I was still really ill. I was in such a dark place I just couldn't concentrate on it at all, and in the end I felt even worse because I felt a failure. I've done some online since which has been quite good (and it's free!) Try MoodGym or Living Life to the Full.

Are you about to start mirtazapine or are you on it already?

Best wishes, it's good you've found a friendly forum - we've all been in that terrible lonely place, but you can recover, please don't give up x

7

I am a newbie here, and agree with Sandy that it is much easier to talk here and feel among friends.

I am suffering from social anxiety, and can't really tell friends why I don't want to socialise. I prefer to hide away and be on my own. I will be 50 next year, and my GP thinks I may be perimenopausal - varying hormone levels can cause depression and irritability. However, oestrogen did not help and caused more panicky feelings, so she has started me on Mirtazipine. I did well with venlafaxine but had to come off because of high BP. I don't seem to react to SSRIs. However, I am worried about the weight gain with Mirt. I have worked really hard to lose some of the weight I gained with venlaf. I have been on Mirt for one week, but feel worse....has anyone else found this? I am more irritable with everyone (inc cats!) and weepy. Just feel I want to give up job/boyfriend/friends as can't cope with it all, also food cravings are bad. Any good stories about Remeron will help motivate me!

Thanks for reading this long story :wink:

8

I was on mirt for a week a week of hell for me be care full with this drug ive been suffering depession for 10 years now it is really hard at times and feel for you guys but i just keep going and it is geting better slowly if any whats to talk my number is ********** IAN i have people i can talk to i no it must be hard if you got no one good luck

(Sorry but Patient Admin have removed either a telephone number, an email address, and or web address, from this posting, as it is the policy of Patient UK not to publish these on this forum.

If you wish to communicate directly with people, you should register, for free, with the forum (click Register in the menu list below the green banner above). You and other registered members will then be able to communicate with each other via Private Messaging (PM) or e-mail.)